I've been thinking about ctb so often lately

[liberty_222]

I keep coming back to this maybe i should just go permanently

 

[outrider567]

I keep coming back to this maybe i should just go permanently

Yeah--me too

 

[FuneralCry]

For me, all that I think about is wanting to leave this world. Death would take away all my suffering and would mean that I would not have to endure this life anymore, only I wish that it is easier to leave this life behind. I wish you the best.

 

[Lost Magic]

I know how you feel. The thought of death sounds very liberating to me. I would finally be free from all the bs that is going on in life. Sleep is a good escape for a bit but then you have to wake up. That's the hardest part, I think.

 

[Idontmatter]

I keep coming back to this maybe i should just go permanently

I think about it 24/7. I try not to but can't stop

 

[nixdeath]

All day I fantasize about killing myself with a gun, it would be my favorite method, but I do not have one.

 

[universe]

I totally understand how you feel. I think about it 25 times a day or more. I get up in the morning telling myself what horror I am on earth, realizing that I was dreaming all night. Standing up hits me hard at reality. Then on the way to work, I constantly tell myself that it would be better to throw myself under such a car or such a train on the way to work. When I'm at work, I feel out of place, when I make a mistake, I don't care and I tell myself that I won't stay on earth for long anyway. And it's like that, all the time, all the time. It never leaves me, it's horrible.
I have the impression that I have one year left to live, that I am at the end of my life, like a terminal phase, and that despite all the occupations that I can find, it is obvious, it is my destiny, it is inevitable.

 

[Achlys]

It consumes my thoughts. Makes me question why I bother trying...

 

[cnel]

I keep coming back to this place. I use to be such a resilient person. But now I'm so burnt out by life. I'm tired of trying so hard and things never working out. Or I get a bright spot where I think finally my life is turning out the way I want and then I get slammed back on the concrete again. I don't know how much more I have in me to keep going through these ups and downs over and over again. I want to stay alive on the strength of maybe it'll get better and my life will start looking how I want it to. But every time I don't kill myself the maybe never arrives or like I said previously it comes and right when I get happy it goes away again. I have children and a grandchild that needs me, but I'm having a hard time living for anyone else. Even my love for them is not giving me the strength to keep trying. If things haven't gotten better by 1/1/23 I think that'll be the end for me. I'm MF tired. I don't know how much more I can take before the last bit of sanity I have snaps.

 

[mateodolores]

Me too.

 

[cnel]

Me too.

Hugs