Venting I’ve been so exhausted lately.

[Ardesevent]

College has been giving me so much work recently, that I barely have the time to sleep more than 3 hours a day. I had plans to hang myself yesterday, but I was so tired I couldn't even find the strength to start setting things up. I snapped at my only friend today, and even though I've apologized for it, she hasn't responded. Our friendship was falling apart anyway, I've barely had the time to talk to her thanks to the amount of work I have. It's probably for the better, I don't want her to miss me when I finally die. I don't even know what I want to do anymore, I'm just exhausted.

 

[theguineapigking]

I'm sorry to hear that. Do you have any will to live? Any hopes or desires?

On one hand I understand wanting your friend to feel distanced so that it's easier on her. On the other,maybe she'd be sad and understand why you acted that way. Maybe she'd be even more sad and wish she'd picked up on it or think maybe she could have done something. If you write a suicide note,maybe you should leave one for her. At least she'd have closure,rather than wondering if you've been distanced because you didn't like her or if it was Because of depression. It would be nice for her to know the answer to that.


Do you have family or anyone you care about other than your mentioned friend? Any other friends? Anyone you know of that would miss you?


Can you work with your schedule at all? Less classes over a longer period of time? Anything to lower the workload? Do you live at home with family or at a dorm?

If you decide suicide,just make sure it's what you really want. If you're unsure,don't rush it. See if you can lower the workload. Maybe talk with your parents if you can. It may be worth trying other options before you decide your life is over.


I can't really say life is worth it personally. However for you,That's something you would have to decide.But for what it's worth,I'm here to talk if you need to. I truly don't mind if you need someone to chat with . I may kill myself any day now. But if I'm alive,I'll reply to you :)

 

[Ardesevent]

Thanks for reaching out to me. My family's out of the picture, and I live in a dorm. I was lucky enough to not have a roommate this semester, so I don't have to worry about them, either.
I'll probably dedicate a section to my friend in my suicide note, thanks for the suggestion. It'll just be reassurance that it wasn't their fault, and there was nothing they could do. I'd hate making them feel responsible for anything. All of my other relationships have pretty much fallen apart, so they're the only person I'm worried about hurting.
I can't risk dropping any classes right now, and I doubt the career I've chosen will be rewarding at all. Suicide's the only answer for me.
Thanks for hearing me out. I'm here if you need to talk too.

 

[S1mpleme]

College has been giving me so much work recently, that I barely have the time to sleep more than 3 hours a day. I had plans to hang myself yesterday, but I was so tired I couldn't even find the strength to start setting things up. I snapped at my only friend today, and even though I've apologized for it, she hasn't responded. Our friendship was falling apart anyway, I've barely had the time to talk to her thanks to the amount of work I have. It's probably for the better, I don't want her to miss me when I finally die. I don't even know what I want to do anymore, I'm just exhausted.

I know that feeling, I'm exhausted everyday, having insomnia.