Venting “It gets better” & my family curse

[burdenox]

People love to say "it gets better" but that feels like an unfinished quote in my opinion. Yes, it does get "better" in the sense that maybe things will be quiet for a week, but then it always gets worse, and it's 10x worse everytime. So getting better just means "brace yourself for the worst" at least in my experience.

I feel like my family is cursed. We just seem to be born and bred to suffer. Like some cruel social experiment. Every day I wake up and wonder which one of us is next. I fear every phone call. I feel like, the way it's going, life will kill me before I can even kill myself. It's ironic that in the last year of my nans life, her and her husband became religious because what kind of god could you possibly believe in that would allow this amount of pain.

Near homelessness, poverty, domestic abuse, severe addiction, 3 family deaths within this year, mental illnesses that infect and ruin every relationship, eating disorders, cancer and so much more.

Why would god make a believer of his suffer so much. If there is a god he's a cruel bastard with no love or empathy in his heart. And what's more? We just have to keep going. Zero mercy. Just waiting for the next godawful life event to come along. And with us all dropping like flies, I have no choice but to live.

Is it so much to ask for to have one month without a new knife stabbed into our backs?

This world is fucking evil.

 

[SilentSadness]

It's true that things rarely get better, the purpose of life is to suffer anyway so it wouldn't make sense for life to be good for everyone. I don't think there is a God and if there is I don't think he should be personified as one; he is a cold blooded torturer if so. Those things you went through are disturbing, I hope you don't have to go through that for much longer. Life really is such a pain and I want to leave more than anything.

 

[FuneralCry]

I don't believe that there even is a God, I very strongly believe that life is just an unfortunate consequence of evolution, there is no meaning or purpose behind life other than that, we exist in a world where existing beings suffer all for no reason. And I actually do believe that life in itself is evil, it disgusts me how all this meaningless and unnecessary torture exists here, I certainly believe that it would be for the best if life never existed at all.

 

[Gaga786]

It sounds so horrendous what you have to endure, and im truly sorry for that. I wish I could ease your pain, but this life is just immensely cruel. I believe this life is a test by God, because it just doesn't make sense, for me, for us to formed out of nothing. I often find myself dabbling in the rumination of life,existence and etc. Nevertheless, those are my beliefs. I do agree that this world is far too cruel and God isn't as loving as people portray them to be.

 

[Rational man]

Im sorry to hear about this awfulness situation and i relate in some ways. Living with chronic illness is like living in erternal purgatory like im being punished by a higher power. But i don't believe in a god, just the creator of planets and nature of which we are part. Theres no devine intervention and the sooner we accept it, the more we realise that life is random, short and chaotic. That life could be snuffed out in so mamy ways in an instant. Life is short, its impermanence and we all do suffer in some way until we return our last breath to the cosmic creator.

 

[burdenox]

It sounds so horrendous what you have to endure, and im truly sorry for that. I wish I could ease your pain, but this life is just immensely cruel. I believe this life is a test by God, because it just doesn't make sense, for me, for us to formed out of nothing. I often find myself dabbling in the rumination of life,existence and etc. Nevertheless, those are my beliefs. I do agree that this world is far too cruel and God isn't as loving as people portray them to be.

I guess with a god this cruel, who needs Satan haha

 

[Gaga786]

I guess with a god this cruel, who needs Satan haha

lol. Some people just didn't ask for this test or experiment, or whatever it is. There should be some way out for people like us in a peaceful manner filled with tranquility.