Some times i feel somewhat okay, not really but sometimes my brain grants me some moments where I don't think so negatively, don't think about suicide, well it is still in the back of my mind but not that prominent for that period of time. I feel like cracking jokes and all but then i have this image of being a silent, isolated person and i feel like it will give people a wrong idea of me? Weirdly maybe? I just feel like i have this personality to maintain, and everyone will start to think that i'm doing well and am content when i'm really not. And when if i ever am resourceful enough to ctb then people might question why? As of now they know i haven't been doing well. I don't know what to do here. Does anyone else go through something similar?
I go through this ALL the time and I've been like that for as long as I can remember. Sometimes I can even appear to be a confident person (and feel like it briefly) but then I remember why I hate this world so much and why I don't have what it takes to survive in it for very long and the facade starts slipping or I lose all of my confidence whenever I manage to have it. Some people probably would be surprised if I committed suicide, but not all of them.
probably everyone. if you feel that way try to explore that before giving up. you may find a way to live the good with the bad and vice versa.
