Story Is this real hope?

[Dragonfly100]

I've been holed up in a hotel trying to ctb for almost 4 days now (tried ctb by bleeding out but drunkenly gave myself a few superficial neck cuts and passed out :/ ). Finally settled on the night night method for when I'm ready.

I escaped from an abusive family and managed to be financially independent before losing my source of income due to Coronavirus closures.

This morning I woke up SURE that it would be my last day but I was put in contact with a safe house through Instagram.

Now my anxiety is through the roof. Ctb is hard but so is continuing to live and fight for things to get better (so many things have and can still go wrong).

Its looking like I have to put all my eggs in one basket and I don't know what to do..

Scared I may somehow make things worse or never get this chance again

Only reason I can think of for continuing to live is for my dog but it's not even guaranteed that I can keep him..

 

[Gregorius]

Hello Dragonfly, I wish you all the best, hopefully you will find your peace :Herz:

 

[Hopeindeath!]

I'm so sorry for your suffering. I hope things get better for you.

 

[PoisonedJuliet]

Feel free to send me a PM. I get it. Life is so tough. I'm here to help you up and dust off your knees if you want. I'll be here for you if you ever need me

 

[It'llNeverEnd]

4 days. I'd just eat a lot and diabetes would take over and kill me off by then.

if you take it I'm glad you get a second chance, they always feel good even if they turn out crappy. I'm on my 5th chance by now.

if you choose to keep going I hope it's successful!

 

[Dragonfly100]

Just found out the safe house wasn't legitimate :/ but thank you everyone! It looks like today's the day after all. I am hoping for peace for us all

 

[faust]

Hello,
I am sorry life is not fair for you...
You are very desperate now and when you are in hurry, this is not a very good thing.
E.g. I would not be able to do night-night method from the first try, it requires some practice.
The best thing to do right now would be to take your time and prepare better.
Have you found your carotid artery? Did you try to press it until you feel dizzy?
I think you have already scrolled down the resources compilation, but just in case leaving the link there:

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/resource-compilation.3/

Sending you hugs