Is there any point to making friends here?

[UnwindingStar]

I mean, seriously, is it? Any friend I make here has the potential to die soon or later, including me.

Yet, I really want to make friends here.

I need to feel less alone feeling this way, even if our friendship only lasts a short while. I'm tired of convincing people this is what I've always wanted. I want someone who understands.

From the moment I understood death, I thought it would better to kill oneself over having no control over your own death. This was before I became obsessed with suicide in general to stop the pain and abuse I eventually suffered shortly after.

I have basically been dancing around with death and breaking up with them when life gets a little easier (not better, not ever better). Then I come back like an embarrassed ex-lover saying "I was wrong....can we start again?". And death always tells me "I told you so" and we start up planning the end of my life.

If anyone has similar feelings and would like to be friends or even chat existentially about life in general, shoot me a PM. I would love it.

 

[dinosavr]

I think in a long shot it would cause more harm than good and it's worth it and eventually you'd pull each other down.

 

[derpyderpins]

My experience trying to make friends here has been mixed to say the least, lol. You do have to remember that we're not all the most stable people (myself absolutely included!), so in addition to ctb you could run into unexpected behavior. If someone gets close to you, try to be understanding.

My DMs are open but I've adopted a "not reaching out first" policy. I will lend an ear to anyone who needs to vent.

 

[_AllCatsAreGrey_]

I mean, seriously, is it? Any friend I make here has the potential to die soon or later, including me.

I've made a couple friends here that I'm glad to know. (Not meeting up irl, but sometimes chatting on other platforms.) As pointed out, we're not exactly the most stable people here, so be understanding that sometimes people don't have the capacity. A few people I've befriended have abruptly disappeared. (Heck, I did that myself for a time.) Some have ctb. So it can be a mixed bag and challenging at times, but worth it ime.

 

[UnwindingStar]

I think in a long shot it would cause more harm than good and it's worth it and eventually you'd pull each other down.

Sometimes, I feel like it literally may be the point

 

[Agon321]

Some people on this site have built good relationships.
There are relatively many people here, so I think you may meet someone interesting.

It all depends on you whether you want it or not.

Just be careful who you trust and don't necessarily share confidential information with others.
There are definitely people on this site who have no good intentions.
Emotionally unstable people can be easy targets.

 

[dinosavr]

Sometimes, I feel like it literally may be the point

I could agree that when you want to feel lower, you might benefit from it, but the problem begins when it's you who causes someone else's suffering.

 

[Dianaaa]

En serio, ¿no? Cualquier amigo que haga aquí tiene el potencial de morir tarde o temprano, incluyéndome a mí.

Aún así, realmente quiero hacer amigos aquí.

Necesito sentirme menos sola sintiéndome así, aunque nuestra amistad dure poco tiempo. Estoy cansada de convencer a la gente de que esto es lo que siempre he querido. Quiero a alguien que me comprenda.

Desde el momento en que entendí la muerte, pensé que era mejor suicidarse que no tener control sobre la propia muerte. Esto fue antes de obsesionarme con el suicidio en general para detener el dolor y el abuso que finalmente sufrí poco después.

Básicamente he estado bailando con la muerte y rompiendo con ellos cuando la vida se vuelve un poco más fácil (no mejor, nunca mejor). Luego vuelvo como un ex amante avergonzado que dice "Me equivoqué... ¿podemos empezar de nuevo?". Y la muerte siempre me dice "Te lo dije" y comenzamos a planificar el final de mi vida.

Si alguien tiene sentimientos similares y le gustaría ser amigo o incluso charlar existencialmente sobre la vida en general, envíeme un mensaje privado. me encantaría

Creo que valdría la pena, supongo que solo hablo por mí pero encontraría reconfortante saber que alguien se tomó el tiempo de leer lo que escribí, me refiero a que por lo menos en mi vida, no encuentro a absolutamente nadie que esté dispuesto a escucharme, siento que eso empeora mi situación, porque es como estar desolada y rota a la vez, como si estuviera en medio del desierto, herida, sin nadie más, sería bueno encontrar a alguien, no importa si igual está herido, solo me gustaría sentirme un poco menos sola, aunque eso pueda ser peligroso, pero si lo pensamos bien, la vida ya es bastante peligrosa

 

[Minsu]

I agree with you. There's no point in making friends here in a long term

 

[LaVieEnRose]

Transience is the normal state of affairs when it comes to human relationships.

So don't let that fact get in the way of cultivating relationships if you'd think they help.

 

[F&Inside]

Hello.
The point is the same as with any other friend coming from another place.
If it's a good friendship it's worth it, here and everywhere else.

 

[SoulWhisperer]

I thinks we're more or less mostly companions on the same boat. It probably will be tough to have long term friendships like outside of here but I think that people can mutually understand each other at least, even silently.

 

[UKscotty]

I'd say it's a very bad idea. Us on here are not going to be in good mental health.

Literally anyone could decide at any moment it's their time to CTB and be gone from this world 5 minutes from now.

 

[Kalista]

i've given up making friends here.

i'm going to share with you my experience in trying to meet people here which will also be partially a vent. some i actually wanted to try and make friends with:
- one was a misunderstanding that ended the contact completely even after i explained the truth of the situation to this user. this one actually fucking hurt me deeply because it's a similar situation from what triggered everything late last year which is the final straw. i've learned that people who fucking dismiss my explanation and only see what they want to fucking believe should not be given any of my time and energy. they refused to understand anything about me and what i'm going through. so fuck ALL of those people.
- personalities/energy that didn't match mine so it became uncomfortable and/or annoying so i stopped
- persistent pro-lifers or hopefuls trying to keep me alive when i've specified i have no intention of continuing after my project fails so i cut contact after a while. these are people who also have an intention of killing themselves. eventually stopped talking to them. fucking hypocrites.
- a few chose to live and go back to whatever the hell they chose to do with their lives. so when they asked how i was and i answer the same fucking thing as always, my situation ends up making them uncomfortable or they just don't respond after i vent. even though they have fucking vented to me about their fucking struggles and have given them attention.
- many others who did respond to a post i made about needing to talk quickly stopped talking to me after i vented. that part is pretty fucking annoying when my post clearly expressed how depressed i was. what did you expect the topic of conversation was going to be? full of unicorns and rainbows?
- one assumed my gender and stopped talking to me after asking and me revealing. this is very similar behavior i've experienced on other platforms. easily realized this person had an agenda after making a 'let's be friends' post on here. so be careful with those people.
- one said he'd hang out with me online but he stopped responding after a few messages
- some have been the typical one or two word responders
- one killed herself by drinking sn. this person is the only one that i actually miss talking to out of every single fucking one i've met on here. she's resting now.
- another also killed himself using sn. there was something off about this one that made me question things

overall, this is not necessarily going to be much different from the people you might meet in other online platforms except the majority are openly suicidal.

as someone has basically mentioned, it's entirely up to you if you want to make all the effort. keep meeting people here, or don't.

 

[3/4Dead]

shrug it's a mixed bag I think. As others have stated, the vast majority of us are not stable and can be a touch unpredictable, so proceed with caution. Relationships of any kind are what you make of them, for me, relationships on SaSu are about finding connections with people who I can speak to about my suicidality without fear of harsh consequences, as well as anything else we find to speak about.

 

[abchia]

This is a hard question. I'd say definitely don't get too attached and don't depend on friends here for your own personal health and well being, but you can meet great and understanding people here to support each other while you're both here. So probably not worth it aside from forum interactions.

 

[Temporal_Anchorite]

I'm inclined to say no, but that's generally my stance towards all online "friendships".

I'm sorry to say, but online friends will never be true friends in any meaningful capacity. As someone who used to have an active & thriving social life irl, I can attest that online friends just simply aren't fulfilling enough. You can't go out to the mall, to the movies, or to parties with online friends. You can't go out for late-night drives and get food, then walk around the neighborhood aimlessly at 3AM with online friends. There are so many different layers of physical and emotional complexity that are entirely absent with online friendships. You're nothing more than an immaterial faceless thing to the other person.