ihatepain

ihatepain

I never wanted to be born.
Mar 24, 2019
142
All things considered, do you all think nembutal is the best method?
 
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HelensNepenthe

HelensNepenthe

Thoughtful poster
Jan 17, 2019
835
Yes. Nembutal has always been seen as this peaceful method of exiting. You overdose on it. You fall asleep. You die peacefully in your sleep.
 
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dandan

dandan

One more attempt on life.
Feb 18, 2019
1,298
yup, the best way... however, a heroin overdose would be more socially aceptable than a suicide... but heroin is not easy to find here.. and an OD shouldn't be easy... so yess. N
 
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N

neveranyhope

Member
Mar 27, 2019
56
Stupid question I know, but is nembutal the "getting N from A" that everyone's talking about? Or is N something else?

I can get heroin easily if I put in a little effort, I'm sure. It's all over my city. I'm more worried about cops and getting arrested tbh because I don't have any relationships with dealers I trust anymore.
 
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dandan

dandan

One more attempt on life.
Feb 18, 2019
1,298
Stupid question I know, but is nembutal the "getting N from A" that everyone's talking about? Or is N something else?

yes, N is Nembutal, and A is the only legit supplier....

I would exchange my N, for a big dosis of H (heroin)... I rather go as a drug addict who OD, than as a suicidal... thats more like socially accepted... damm..
 
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N

neveranyhope

Member
Mar 27, 2019
56
yes, N is Nembutal, and A is the only legit supplier....

I would exchange my N, for a big dosis of H (heroin)... I rather go as a drug addict who OD, than as a suicidal... thats more like socially accepted... damm..

Thank you, @dandan ... personally, I used to use a lot of drugs (never H but other pills, cocaine, etc; still a daily cannabis user), and I think my family would be more humiliated if I died of a drug overdose than committed suicide. Weirdly it's more socially acceptable in certain social circles to kill yourself than be a dirty loser drug addict (not my assessment of drug addicts or users, mind, just the people I know). I'm not sure what country you're in but in the US, we don't look kindly at drug users. It's viewed as a failure of will or something, I don't know. Never mind the Sackler family who lied and pumped this country full of oxy getting everyone hooked for twenty years to make billions of dollars...
Question, is barbituatepharmacy.com not to be trusted? It doesn't really pass the sniff test (ie, seems too good / easy to be legit)
 
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dandan

dandan

One more attempt on life.
Feb 18, 2019
1,298
I wouldn't trust barbituatepharmacy .com , no way.

In my case, @neveranyhope ... i'm clean, never used H or was a needle user...
so a OD of heroin would be like, hmm... im a clean guy, who doesnt drink, go to work everyday, hey he took heroin once, and died.... bummer...

thats the scenario I was talking about...

but suicide... my mom is gonna have such a hard life if I decide to go through with it... she'll be destroyed... im even doubting if I'll do it...

but if I decide Not to.... what can I expect out of life? Haven't had anything good going for me in the past 18 years, cant expect things to go better... thats ridiculous... im having a hard time debating in my mind if I should kill myself or not
 
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N

neveranyhope

Member
Mar 27, 2019
56
I wouldn't trust barbituatepharmacy .com , no way.

In my case, @neveranyhope ... i'm clean, never used H or was a needle user...
so a OD of heroin would be like, hmm... im a clean guy, who doesnt drink, go to work everyday, hey he took heroin once, and died.... bummer...

thats the scenario I was talking about...

but suicide... my mom is gonna have such a hard life if I decide to go through with it... she'll be destroyed... im even doubting if I'll do it...

but if I decide Not to.... what can I expect out of life? Haven't had anything good going for me in the past 18 years, cant expect things to go better... thats ridiculous... im having a hard time debating in my mind if I should kill myself or not

I hear you, making it look like an accident. Yeah, I understand that. That I think is understandable. My family just looks down upon anyone who even thinks about using substances (never mind the fact they're all alcoholics...) so they wouldn't look kindly on me about it at all.

I think if you have a good relationship with your mom, try to lean into it? I'm a terrible one for this because I feel like if I only had a good relationship with my family (they were abusers), I would never have wanted to ctb ever. I'm sure I don't understand having the feelings and still being close to loved ones.

Do you have work? What do you think would need to happen for the feelings to go away?
 
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dandan

dandan

One more attempt on life.
Feb 18, 2019
1,298
I hear you, making it look like an accident. Yeah, I understand that. That I think is understandable. My family just looks down upon anyone who even thinks about using substances (never mind the fact they're all alcoholics...) so they wouldn't look kindly on me about it at all.

I think if you have a good relationship with your mom, try to lean into it? I'm a terrible one for this because I feel like if I only had a good relationship with my family (they were abusers), I would never have wanted to ctb ever. I'm sure I don't understand having the feelings and still being close to loved ones.

Do you have work? What do you think would need to happen for the feelings to go away?
I had to feel hope...
that I'm able to hold conversation with people... what good is living is I am all by myself... and dont talk to people, I can have minor conversations... but meaningless..
I hardly have fun, I can enjoy watching Seinfeld, he's comedy is way too smart..
I would need to forgive many big mistakes I've made, which I live with regret...
I hate the fact I lost money.... and when my mom gets old... I'm going to have to be working from 8 to 6 and wont be able to be with her....
not even when she gets sick... and old... I fucked it up


oh I have a job, but im aint working, I have been paid to study for the last six months....
I've been studying software automation tester, but they have me on different courses, so I cant be an expert on 1 thing... they want me to learn many different things, thus not becoming an expert in anything....

plus my bad memory haunts me... I forget things way to fast.... that is a major point of ctb.... why do I want to live if I cant function properly?

my memory sucks, cause of drug abuse and eelctroconvulsive therapy and 3 hard hits to the head...
 
dandan

dandan

One more attempt on life.
Feb 18, 2019
1,298
Where would one buy nebutal

with A [ask some one to PM his email to you] or in a Vet Shop in a country, city, and specific vet shop, where N is sold without presciption (not many)
 
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ihatepain

ihatepain

I never wanted to be born.
Mar 24, 2019
142
yup, the best way... however, a heroin overdose would be more socially aceptable than a suicide... but heroin is not easy to find here.. and an OD shouldn't be easy... so yess. N
Why is that a more socially accepted method?
 
H

Hotsackage

Enlightened
Mar 11, 2019
1,027
with A [ask some one to PM his email to you] or in a Vet Shop in a country, city, and specific vet shop, where N is sold without presciption (not many)
What's A mean lol
 
dandan

dandan

One more attempt on life.
Feb 18, 2019
1,298
Why is that a more socially accepted method?
im talking about myself
if a friend OD, I'd be like: "shit man, drugs suck"

if a friend OD, I'd be like: "fuck man, what kind of youth that guy had," some people might blame my mother, or father, or they could think and imagine things... OD is more of a statement...

but really? If im going to be dead, why do I care? damm... thats very illogic
 
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ihatepain

ihatepain

I never wanted to be born.
Mar 24, 2019
142
yes, N is Nembutal, and A is the only legit supplier....

I would exchange my N, for a big dosis of H (heroin)... I rather go as a drug addict who OD, than as a suicidal... thats more like socially accepted... damm..
I never want to die a natural death or by any other way. I want to die by suicide and I don't mind if people knew that my death was a suicide. Am I the only one that thinks like this? I'm wondering
 
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dandan

dandan

One more attempt on life.
Feb 18, 2019
1,298
What's A mean lol
MOD EDIT: "A" stands for the name of a guy that supplies nembutal world wide via the mail. You can find him in the peaceful pill handbook.

I never want to die a natural death or by any other way. I want to die by suicide and I don't mind if people knew that my death was a suicide. Am I the only one that thinks like this? I'm wondering

quite a statement, you sure have some issues going on

maybe thats why i've been thinking about ..... I cant even imagine working from 8 to 6 for the next 30 years of my life , dreaming what it could've been if I hadn't lost my money.... its a daily complaint,,,, fuck
 
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ihatepain

ihatepain

I never wanted to be born.
Mar 24, 2019
142
quite a statement, you sure have some issues going on

maybe thats why i've been thinking about ..... I cant even imagine working from 8 to 6 for the next 30 years of my life , dreaming what it could've been if I hadn't lost my money.... its a daily complaint,,,, fuck
Well I don't see why suicide should be a taboo subject in society. In my opinion, suicide is the best way to die because I get to choose exactly when, where and how I'm going to die. Other types of death (especially natural deaths) are usually slow and painful. I don't see the point in living until I'm old and dying naturally because that would be horrible. I view life on the whole as a broken cycle.
 
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bigj75

bigj75

“From Knowledge springs power."
Sep 1, 2018
2,540
I dont care if it's socially acceptable or not. Ctb'ing needs to be done.
 
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dandan

dandan

One more attempt on life.
Feb 18, 2019
1,298
I dont care if it's socially acceptable or not. Ctb'ing needs to be done.

sure mate, wish you the best.... many people talk and say we are gonna do it... and many of us say its needed to be done too... but we still here, and thats not bad, but ctb'ing needs to be done...

its like any goal setting...
  1. When are you gonna do it? you need to set a date!
  2. What would you be drinking,,, make sure its enough
  3. Will you be undisturbed for 12+ hours?
  4. Take the antiemetics, do the regime or stat dose
  5. Goodbye beautiful world, it could've been a beautiful life...
 
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F

fisil

Arcanist
Mar 9, 2019
432
Who cares you are dead bitch bro
yes, N is Nembutal, and A is the only legit supplier....

I would exchange my N, for a big dosis of H (heroin)... I rather go as a drug addict who OD, than as a suicidal... thats more like socially accepted... damm..
 
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TAW122

TAW122

Emissary of the right to die.
Aug 30, 2018
6,813
Yes, assuming that one is able to successfully obtain it (legally or illegally - getting it through all the hoops and maneuvering). For me, it's too much trouble, but assuming that I could, I'd probably take N over the firearm method.
 
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WOODESITY

WOODESITY

Experienced
Mar 15, 2019
217
I think nembutal is best way to ctb
 
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A

AE496

Member
May 7, 2019
26
N seems to be the best method. However, I still worry about the risks of failure if done on my own, as opposed to professionally. There are many aspects outside my control such as getting the real stuff, using the right dosage, vomiting, etc.

I have been thinking of combining N with a noose around neck, while standing. That way if the N knocks me out and fails to kill me, then the partial suspension hanging will.
 
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C

CTB-London

Student
Feb 26, 2019
160
yup, the best way... however, a heroin overdose would be more socially aceptable than a suicide... but heroin is not easy to find here.. and an OD shouldn't be easy... so yess. N

I think that an apparently accidental heroin overdose is less socially acceptable and would be upsetting and embarrassing to those you leave behind.

I think committing suicide and leaving a note would be less difficult to come to terms with.
 
C

Clr

New Member
Jul 20, 2019
2
Hi would someone be able to pm A's contact details for N? Thank you :)
 
C

Codieb1

Student
Jun 18, 2019
178
You guys really shouldn't be saying his full name publicly like this, if people can't do their research then it's their loss. This info isn't super hidden by any means, but if someone really wants to look for it, they'll find it.
 
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Meretlein

Meretlein

Moderator
Feb 15, 2019
1,199
That and nitrogen. Inert gases like helium and nitrogen would be more popular if the setup wasn't so complicated.
 

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