Antigonish
Mage
- Sep 19, 2020
- 593
I haven't been feeling alive lately. Don't think I've ever felt alive. Except when i was in second grade and almost died in a car accident. The excitement, the ecstasy, the finality... but now everything and everyone is so bleak. I feel like a clean blank piece of paper surrounded by a world full of ink. And the only way I can put words on my empty pages is through pain. It's literally the only way I know I'm living. The only way I know I'm alive. I dont wish to die, just that I never existed. I stayed away for some time. But now I'm back. Cause this feeling never fades. It fuels my depression. Knowing I don't belong in a existence where I should exist. Life sucks. Being dead inside sucks worse.