NSFW Is it worthwhile/possible for me to recover?

[MeowTheFlemishCat]

Time spend in wards for my OCD:

- 1 month Kortrijk 2020
- 3 months Ghent 2021
- 8 months Ypres 2022

Those 8 months were involuntary and my mom had conservatorship pushed. I got $1750 a month in disability payments.


Since August 11th, I've been in excruciating pain every single second with no relief. I don't want to die but this would be the primary reason to, to escape pain I can't resolve or find relief from.

 

[puella]

I'm sorry you're in so much pain. I could never understand the pain you're in as well as you do, and I can't decide something like this for you. But just know I'm here for you.

 

[overthestorm]

I feel you. I too have severe ocd, alongside severe depression. I can't function at all and like you, every second is hell. I last got out of a ward in May. They didn't even know what to do with me. I'm sorry you're in so much pain

 

[MeowTheFlemishCat]

I feel you. I too have severe ocd, alongside severe depression. I can't function at all and like you, every second is hell. I last got out of a ward in May. They didn't even know what to do with me. I'm sorry you're in so much pain

How did/are you enduring? I plan to hang myself

 

[HighFlight]

@MeowTheFlemishCat, I'm sorry to hear your in so much pain, and have spent so much time committed and your mom has a conservatorship. Hopefully, the money is still coming to you.

You mentioned the pain started on August 11. Im assuming that the doctors either don't know what it is or there's not a treatment. And they haven't been able to manage the pain through meds or other treatments.

What are they telling you is causing the pain? (Sorry, only answer if you feel comfortable, or PM me.)

You are so much braver than I. To survive this level of pain for 2 months, with little to no help. Before you make any permanent decisions, do as much research on the pain, it's causes and any treatment options as you can stand. At least you will be armed to make an informed decision.

I truly hope that you can be free of your suffering as quickly as possible, and support your decision regardless of which path you choose.

 

[MeowTheFlemishCat]

@MeowTheFlemishCat, I'm sorry to hear your in so much pain, and have spent so much time committed and your mom has a conservatorship. Hopefully, the money is still coming to you.

You mentioned the pain started on August 11. Im assuming that the doctors either don't know what it is or there's not a treatment. And they haven't been able to manage the pain through meds or other treatments.

What are they telling you is causing the pain? (Sorry, only answer if you feel comfortable, or PM me.)

You are so much braver than I. To survive this level of pain for 2 months, with little to no help. Before you make any permanent decisions, do as much research on the pain, it's causes and any treatment options as you can stand. At least you will be armed to make an informed decision.

I truly hope that you can be free of your suffering as quickly as possible, and support your decision regardless of which path you choose.

It's caused by OCD contamination which I avoided for 10 years being spread all over to the point I can't avoid or decontaminate ~ it feels imbued into my flesh and my brain won't stop harming itself

 

[FuneralCry]

That must be so horrible what you are going through, it's just so cruel how people have to suffer so much in this existence but anyway I wish you the best.

 

[overthestorm]

How did/are you enduring? I plan to hang myself

I'm not enduring tbh. I'm getting worse by the day at rapid pace so I need to get out soon