Venting Is it so hard to just say "I support you"?

[grssknt]

There are two people in my life I've trusted enough to tell them that I'm suicidal and I have plans. It's been like this for almost a year now, and even though I'm in therapy and I've upped my antidepressant dosage, been in a psych ward, tried all sorts of things, I don't feel any different. But they still just belittle me and tell me I'm not trying hard enough and that if I do it they'll be angry at me for the rest of their lives. I know they're saying that to try and stop me but all it does is make me certain that my last moments will be filled with sadness and guilt.

All I want is someone to say "It's not that I want you to die, but if that's what you've decided, I love you and I support you." They don't need to help me or anything, just support me and respect that I know what is right for me. I'm not a child throwing a tantrum, I'm a fully grown adult who has thought about this extremely carefully. I just want someone to love me enough to give me this one thing.

 

[Suicidebydeath]

"It's not that I want you to die, but if that's what you've decided, I love you and I support you." is pretty much how I feel about it with other people.

Saying they'll be angry and things seems kind of manipulative, but not judging as a lot of people would say that.

 

[Pluto]

It's hard when most people have their own self-interest. Their feelings of guilt or anger tarnish their responses. Good thing we have this website (for now).

 

[Sherri]

There are two people in my life I've trusted enough to tell them that I'm suicidal and I have plans. It's been like this for almost a year now, and even though I'm in therapy and I've upped my antidepressant dosage, been in a psych ward, tried all sorts of things, I don't feel any different. But they still just belittle me and tell me I'm not trying hard enough and that if I do it they'll be angry at me for the rest of their lives. I know they're saying that to try and stop me but all it does is make me certain that my last moments will be filled with sadness and guilt.

All I want is someone to say "It's not that I want you to die, but if that's what you've decided, I love you and I support you." They don't need to help me or anything, just support me and respect that I know what is right for me. I'm not a child throwing a tantrum, I'm a fully grown adult who has thought about this extremely carefully. I just want someone to love me enough to give me this one thing.

hello, I was also in a ward for 3 weeks, all they did was force me to take pills that at a point I was drooling. 8am wake up call, all breaks timed. The rest was horrible food, I don't eat pork, guess what was always on the menu, pork, I starved and took loads of pills on an empty stomach, we would just crash in the sofa the whole day and do silly games where the shrink told us all about his sexual experiences, disgusting guy with girls in the game. Never again. 10pm was bedtime and I was like finally a time for myself. I was lucky they gave me a room for myself. That was the only good day I got from those 3 weeks. Finally got a doctor When I was at a verge of suicide,he just prescribed me 3 things, made a huge difference , after so many doctors and being made a Guinea pig someone balanced my brain and all. Hope you find that help that we all deserve. A big hug.

 

[cambrai33]

Unfortunately these people can't understand as they have never been in the mindset, to them it's a completely illogical idea to ctb.

Don't be too hard on them, it's difficult to know the right things to say and they would hate to be supportive of ctb as it would feel like they had given up on you. That's just my opinion of course and I could be talking bollocks.

Essentially you should find peace that they care for you, don't expect them to support losing you though

 

[FuneralCry]

Those people are selfish, they want you to stay alive for their sake. People who are not suicidal themselves will never be able to comprehend what it is like. Many people live under a delusion that life is always worth living and are in denial of the fact that things can get that hopeless that someone would consider ctb. We have a right to exit this world at a time of our own choosing, and others should try to respect our decisions, it is our life after all. Personally, I never tell others about wanting to ctb, in no way would they ever understand.