is it serious

[netrezven]

Hi, having this feeling to end life is something i'm used too from long time ago. I know - this comes inside your mind when you have no idea how to solve your problems. This trick of mind is something I completely realize. Most of the time when i can't solve a problem, it concerns personal relationships and trust. All the drama in my life is made from my mind only. I wasn't emotional, had no shame or regrets at all. I used to like myself, had ambitions, some free cash, will to go out with friends, mood.
Stage 1: used to it (sleep with it, woke up with it, but live it anyway)
Stage 2:can't stand it, and think of variants to do it, and variants afterwards for closest people
Stage 3:Say to yourself that you wan't it and is selfish, so forget about it
Stage 4:Say to yourself that others don't deserve you and the decision is yours only
Stage 5K, you can do it, but first lets create a crazy unbelievable to-do list before that happens
Stage 6:Say to yourself it will be better for everyone you love
I may be in Stage 6 from my list. Is it really dangerous?

Don't take any of this seriously. Will never do it. My mind may be fucked up, but my nature won't let me and will live it up anyway positively.

 

[SiArc]

Well hun if you know for sure you won't ever do it then it is just ideation and not a execution plan so just ride it out? Find things to try to reverse it be it therapy, pills, reaquainting yourself with things you like, finding a new faucet of interest, or setting new aspirations for yourself.

I am familiar with those steps. Been drawing out my own version for almost two decades.
My stage 6 is that it is better for me and I don't care about others. Resignation it shall happen and a kind of peace.