I can understand how Trump's presidency might feel like a game of Russian roulette, which would satisfy a suicidal person's fantasy—when will the merciful bomb come down and end things instantaneously? This is the stance of accelerationists on the far left.
But the damage he does is more subtle (yes, the world's least subtle man does subtle damage).
And the chaos isn't distributed evenly: certain populations endure violence on account of his actions, his failures, his followers, his failure to act when his followers get violent.
I'm sure I sound like a naive SJW when I say the rise of fascism in America is already happening, but I think it's more naive to pretend this guy's chaos is cartoonish and silly when in fact it's symptomatic of a dark historical development.
The way you present your view is interesting to me—you want to die, and you want society to collapse too—but zoom out far enough and I feel like the logic works in reverse too. The factors that make up this collapse have been in the works for a while, Trump being just a figurehead for them, and have probably contributed to your suicidality, and mine. Biden won't fix that, and neither would a Harris presidency, but at the very least I think I can trust them not to, say, put any more kids in cages or fail to enact a plan in the face of a pandemic.
Hope none of that comes across as too condescending. I can only respect certain strains of nihilism I guess.