Notlikeforte
Member
- Mar 18, 2021
- 33
Right now I feel like I'm sort of in limbo. My anxiety feels too uncontrolled to bring up anything that could help my situation with my therapist, and my psychiatrist is only able to meet me for 15 minutes every 6 weeks. None of this feels like it is working.
I'm starting to miss the psych ward. I hate almost everything about those places, but at least you can see a doctor who will adjust meds promptly. With my current psych I'm often stuck with a med that doesn't work for 2-3 since "antidepressants take time to kick in." Sure, I could always get a new psych, but with the rising rates of mental illness lately it is almost impossible to find one who isn't waitlisted.
I just wonder if potentially finding a treatment that works is worth the gamble, considering I would likely have to spend around a week at minimum locked inside a hospital. The last times I went I struggled with the prison-like structure of the place and had to leave *against medical advice* since I felt severely anxious. Maybe that is something I would need to talk to them about as well.
Anyway, I just want to be taken seriously. Thinking of this all reminds me of something: my psychiatrist is an asshat and once told me that because I can check myself into the hospital I'm not too anxious to open up at therapy with my counselor. Yet for me I feel like this isn't the case as I never have been able to. There's a difference between zombie-walking to the hospital and opening up about triggering topics to a professional.
Should I just go back before I actually get acutely suicidal? I can't tell if something is building up or if I'm just being an attentionhog.
I'm starting to miss the psych ward. I hate almost everything about those places, but at least you can see a doctor who will adjust meds promptly. With my current psych I'm often stuck with a med that doesn't work for 2-3 since "antidepressants take time to kick in." Sure, I could always get a new psych, but with the rising rates of mental illness lately it is almost impossible to find one who isn't waitlisted.
I just wonder if potentially finding a treatment that works is worth the gamble, considering I would likely have to spend around a week at minimum locked inside a hospital. The last times I went I struggled with the prison-like structure of the place and had to leave *against medical advice* since I felt severely anxious. Maybe that is something I would need to talk to them about as well.
Anyway, I just want to be taken seriously. Thinking of this all reminds me of something: my psychiatrist is an asshat and once told me that because I can check myself into the hospital I'm not too anxious to open up at therapy with my counselor. Yet for me I feel like this isn't the case as I never have been able to. There's a difference between zombie-walking to the hospital and opening up about triggering topics to a professional.
Should I just go back before I actually get acutely suicidal? I can't tell if something is building up or if I'm just being an attentionhog.
