I

ineedtoleave

Student
Oct 3, 2020
133
Please be HONEST if this is possible for me.

I have severe gut issues, SIBO, leaky gut etc.
I somehow got severe stressed and something just 'snapped' in my brain.
Anxious, insomnia etc and when I couldn't fix it I chose to go with CTBing.
I am so anxious I cannot leave my bed my whole body is tense, my whole head hurts, i can't focus normally or talk normally anymore.
My whole gums are pulled back and my teeth hurt, I am cold all the time. My whole face changed. I am now really ugly, lost a lot of hair. I'm shaking most of the day. Scared of death and scared of being locked up forever. I feel sooo ill, mentally and physically.

I feel like i'm actually insane, like actually. I only think about how bad I feel and that I need to die but CTB gives me so much anxiety and leaves me even more sick.
What do I do? Is there a way out of this at all? Meds make me worse by the way, which is not funny.

Had anyone been through this and healed? And I mean with these severe issues..

Please let me know !!
 
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Life_and_Death

Life_and_Death

Do what's best for you 🕯️ Right now, I'm stressed
Jul 1, 2020
6,897
I can't speak for the physical problems although I do understand some of them like being cold. As for the mental problems, possibly. But it all depends on you. If you don't honestly work at it then it doesn't matter how basic or complex the problem is, the answers no. And yes I'm speaking from personal experience.
 
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I

ineedtoleave

Student
Oct 3, 2020
133
I can't speak for the physical problems although I do understand some of them like being cold. As for the mental problems, possibly. But it all depends on you. If you don't honestly work at it then it doesn't matter how basic or complex the problem is, the answers no. And yes I'm speaking from personal experience.
So you think no matter how f**ked up your brain is, you can still heal? Like I have high anxiety and suicidal thoughts and ideation 24/7. Can that truly be healed?I'm also exhausted obviously and feel very very sick, did you have that too?
 
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woknows

Experienced
Dec 12, 2020
264
Maybe you have undiagnosed medical condition. Even lack of vitamins/micronutrients can cause all sorts of problems. Unfortunately most doctors pretend people cannot have a lack of anything. Chronic stress is not good for you either. No one here can give the answer you seek. Maybe a good doctor can help you figure it our or you might simply be fucked for life.
I am asking myself a similar question. Just the symptoms are a bit different.
Check all the causes for SIBO and start with the ones that can be cured. One is nerve damage. That once can for instance be cause by lack of vitamins. For instance and move from there. Once you rule out fixable causes, you might accept that you are fucked.
It would help if you had access to a good team of doctors and enough money to get proper checkup. Most of us are not as lucky.
 
Life_and_Death

Life_and_Death

Do what's best for you 🕯️ Right now, I'm stressed
Jul 1, 2020
6,897
So you think no matter how f**ked up your brain is, you can still heal? Like I have high anxiety and suicidal thoughts and ideation 24/7. Can that truly be healed?I'm also exhausted obviously and feel very very sick, did you have that too?
I've been dealing with/dealt with constant dissociation for months, bpd, hallucinations, imposter syndrome, ptsd (to a lesser extent cptsd as well) multiple kinds of anxiety, lately I've come to the conclusion that I'm fairly confident I have sensory processing disorder ( what it is lines up perfect but the accounts I've read don't of course things are different for everyone), plus some other stuff. It took me 4 years but I am starting to get somewhere.

I have my own physical problems as well, constant back discomfort/pain, headaches, I get "randomly" sick here and there, I get random pains throughout my body.
 
T

the_final_countdown

Specialist
Dec 29, 2020
337
It's possible. I know a few people who overcame similar problems.

It's challenging though. I suspect it's similar to overcoming Stage IV cancer in terms of difficulty. Except you don't get any of the sympathy or pity from people because there are few medicinal tests designed for it. And that is just as psychologically overwhelming. I'm sure you've felt it.

It sounds like you have a Candida infection (a fungal infection). Or perhaps gut imbalance.

I'm sure you've tried just about everything to heal it.

From my research, different people exhibit different symptoms.

I have similar issues and similar symptoms. I've tried just about everything. Nothing has really worked but I keep trying anyways. There's nothing else to do.

I understand your desperation. And your pain.

I suffer like you do. I do.

There's a book about a man who overcame his problems with high doses of iodine and supplements. It took a few months.

Others who found a lot of success by switching to a probiotic heavy diet.

It's hard. I don't know what to say.

Keep trying my dear.

And if it's any consolation, I believe your suffering is immense. I do. And I understand and I'm sorry.

I'd hug you if I could.

I wish you well. You've endured a great deal.

God bless.
 
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L

lifegoeson

Member
Jan 16, 2021
34
Have you gone and been tested for the stomach issues? If you get a clear diagnosis it may help you with healing your physical problems which in turn may help with the mental issues. In regards to the insanity thing I believe that is a symptom of depression. The lack of control caused by depression/anxiety makes you feel insane (if you were truly insane you would have no or very little awareness of your actions and would just go about doing these things).
 
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BeansOfRequirement

BeansOfRequirement

Behind the guilt was compassion
Jan 26, 2021
5,747
One thing at a time, lad/lass. I believe all of those are fixable/manageable, but not all at once and it'll take a good while. You could rank them on pen and paper or on the computer and prioritize the ones that are causing you the most suffering, knock them down first and move down the list. The important thing is to write it down so you don't have a tsunami of important problems, annoying details, judgments and suicidal ideation swirling around in your head 24/7.
 
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Thegoldenapples

Thegoldenapples

Specialist
Aug 12, 2020
349
I think you have chronic Candida, parasites, toxins, heavy metals etc in your body. Your head is reacting like that because your stomach is so toxic. They are connected. I'd suggest trying kambo, it's a frog medicine and it works fast. Seek iakp.org and find a practitioner close to you. Then get colonic irrigation and do saunas. You can heal from that, you just need to shift things out of you so your body can breathe and do it's work. I can't seem to find pm on the new .org site. If you pm me I can help you with what to do. Stay off meat, gluten, diary. Eat organic fresh foods.
 
Water-Lily

Water-Lily

Enlightened
Dec 26, 2020
1,190
I have BPD and depression
I have mentally give-up so much that I feel I cannot recover. I wont let myself recover because I am scared. I push people away, hate myself and the cycle repeats. I feel as if this whole world is better off without a bitch like me existing. All I do is cause trouble

All that I say about myself though, if you can try. Think of it like this, we can CTB whenever we want to. If you try something and it doesn't work out CTB is always an option. And then maybe you might realize CTB isn't necessary. Though its up to you. Just try and see. And if not there is always CTB
 
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DetachedDreamer97

DetachedDreamer97

Enlightened
Mar 17, 2018
1,402
I'll say it's possible. The thing is, you're gonna have to obsessively look up and research what you have, after a diagnosis if you haven't already. Then search for remedies, whether it's be diets, supplements, teas, or whatever. Probably forget about taking medicine prescribed by doctors for GI issues unless you're absolutely sure it won't harm you in the long run. I haven't the same exact issues as you, but a couple years back, I had IBS-D and GERD, and it took me months of drinking teas, eating sauerkraut, apple cider vinegar, D-Limonene supplements, melatonin, etcetera to bring my life back to normal. Which in a way, made things better for me mentally.

Not sure on what is a good solution for you mentally, but I'd say gut and grain goes a long way. I believe you got this! Just gotta push yourself.
 

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