sleeplessboyinbed
Some guy
- Mar 26, 2026
- 24
I mean both social and medical.
I really want to be a man, be seen as a man. But the only way (in this life) for me to be a man is to be trans. In a perfect world i wouldn't mind being trans and transitioning medically and socially, i really want to actually. Im just not sure how it will be in real life. In my country it's not really common to see trans people at all, so everything i know is from the internet, American one to be exact. And the problem is, i don't know if im being realistic here. I watched so many happy trans men just live their lifes, but they're all American. I don't know how it will translate into my reality, i really just feel delusional for ever thinking i could be one of them.
I also feel really selfish for it. Who do i think i am? Do i even deserve happiness? Am i asking for too much when i say i want to be a man? I feel like a man and i want everyone to see it too, is it wrong? Im genuinely asking because i don't know anymore. Should i just accept my misery? I feel like i don't deserve to live.
Sorry im imposing a role of a therapist to you, i just don't have anybody else to ask. I hope it's appropriate to ask this. It's really a problem i cant solve on my own. I need input from other people :ā -ā !. And sorry for being so negative, i would never think and say this to another trans person.
Also, i think my ctb is soon but im not sure, so briefly mentioning it here. Should be April 8th, if not you can shame me
I really want to be a man, be seen as a man. But the only way (in this life) for me to be a man is to be trans. In a perfect world i wouldn't mind being trans and transitioning medically and socially, i really want to actually. Im just not sure how it will be in real life. In my country it's not really common to see trans people at all, so everything i know is from the internet, American one to be exact. And the problem is, i don't know if im being realistic here. I watched so many happy trans men just live their lifes, but they're all American. I don't know how it will translate into my reality, i really just feel delusional for ever thinking i could be one of them.
I also feel really selfish for it. Who do i think i am? Do i even deserve happiness? Am i asking for too much when i say i want to be a man? I feel like a man and i want everyone to see it too, is it wrong? Im genuinely asking because i don't know anymore. Should i just accept my misery? I feel like i don't deserve to live.
Sorry im imposing a role of a therapist to you, i just don't have anybody else to ask. I hope it's appropriate to ask this. It's really a problem i cant solve on my own. I need input from other people :ā -ā !. And sorry for being so negative, i would never think and say this to another trans person.
Also, i think my ctb is soon but im not sure, so briefly mentioning it here. Should be April 8th, if not you can shame me
