Help iPhone help -where do links open??

[DOHARDTHINGS24]

Hi guys
Another dumb tech question because I don't know what I'm doing. I'll try to keep this one short, am a rambler sorry…
I am living with my digital snooping ex who is great at tech & I am shit. That sums it up. I have set up a secret email & a VPN & this account & that's as far as I've managed. I "think" I've managed to have my own Apple ID but I'm still not confident of what he can & can't see. I am limited in my research to just an iPhone & pen & paper & it's taking forever. Tomorrow, hopefully I have time to take some really good notes - I definitely can't take screenshots, I legit think we still might have same cloud??? I don't know what the cloud is, so there's that.
So my very specific problem is, if I'm on an iPhone using a VPN & on here, I'm pretty confident I'm ok. But, I don't know about the links & stuff. So for two specific examples,
1 - in threads where there are purple "spoiler" boxes eg SN Megathread, what happens if I click on that? Does it just expand? Or open somewhere?
2 - there is a https:// link to pph. If I open that, what happens? Where does it open? Does it go in files? Or somewhere else? A lovely & generous helper on here sent me the sticky thingy, but now that I actually "should" have time to properly research, I want to smash out as much as possible & get back on track to hurrying this back up - I had planned to be gone by now - so I don't know what else I'll stumble across on here & want to read. I've bookmarked things like Stan's Bible & they seem straightforward & safe. But I need to be really really careful about how I proceed with the rest. I'm trying to get a hold of a laptop but that just may not happen. So I just need to know how each thing opens & where & how & if our phones are still linked in any way (& it's entirely possible, including spy /tracking stuff or just simple tech stuff that I know nothing at all about). If he has this information, he won't be using it to save me, that won't be the priority, it'll be blackmail or worse, & I'm legitimately concerned about my safety but also need to read as much as I can so I don't stuff this up.
That didn't end up short, even though I tried very, very hard. I'm sorry. I NEED to know any digital traces before I open absolutely anything, I can't wing it, I have to be sure. And I don't know even the basics. So any help appreciated, even if it seems very obvious & basic to you, that any idiot should know, I assure you, this idiot does not know.

 

[DOHARDTHINGS24]

Self bump

 

[itsalittlecold]

I can't cover/explain it all, however…

1- it shouldn't open any extra tabs, when you click on them it should redirect you to the page you clicked on, without opening an extra tab.

2- yes, clicking on the pph link will open another tab on your browser… downloads won't happen automatically & you'll always get a message asking if you want to download & you'll have to confirm yes or no before it'd happen.

Can't really answer about spy/tracking software as the possibilities are endless there. If you are using the same iCloud it should show you via settings-apple id- sign in & security.


I recommend you use a browser called 'BRAVE' once installed, use the private tab and nothing can track or trace you & the tabs and history are automatically deleted when you leave the browser. As a bonus brave has adblockers (great for YouTube)

 

[DOHARDTHINGS24]

Thanks so much! I installed Brave but have been using Proton VPN. Is that much different?? I changed my Apple ID & everything I could manage but I think somehow the cloud stuff, he still sees. I really don't know.

 

[itsalittlecold]

Thanks so much! I installed Brave but have been using Proton VPN. Is that much different?? I changed my Apple ID & everything I could manage but I think somehow the cloud stuff, he still sees. I really don't know.

Still use the VPN just added security for you.
I'm not to sure how to get past the Apple ID, however using private tab on brave will prevent anything been seen.

 

[DOHARDTHINGS24]

Still use the VPN just added security for you.
I'm not to sure how to get past the Apple ID, however using private tab on brave will prevent anything been seen.

I'm using private tabs for everything.
And Proton VPN for stuff like this.
I "thought" he'd been removed from everything & didn't have access to my phone or emails but today I saw something not right on my phone by accident & asked a friend & they showed me ways he still had access. Which I stopped. Well, what I know of for sure. But I didn't feel comfortable telling my friend any more than that to get them to look for more. When I got home, I confronted him about it, WITH PROOF, actual evidence, on the screen, can't be faked or just paranoia, & he went bananas. Shouldn't have done it. But I was just so sad. So sad. More than mad. Heartbroken & demeaned & I wish it had been in my head. And the denying made me sick to my stomach, the way he lied to my face without a moments hesitation. In the face of evidence. And it just makes me wonder what else he's doing that I've got no clue about. I think it's got to the stage where I have to humiliate myself at the Apple Store & let the geniuses do their magic. I feel sick & sad & just so so sad

 

[let.me.let.go87]

I have iPhone as well. Use DuckDuckGo. You can clear the browser history easily by hitting the little flare symbols at the bottom of the screen and he won't be able to view your browser history at all.

 

[DOHARDTHINGS24]

I have iPhone as well. Use DuckDuckGo. You can clear the browser history easily by hitting the little flare symbols at the bottom of the screen and he won't be able to view your browser history at all.

Thanks
I'm using the private pages & a VPN & am not overly concerned with browser history.
My problem is more like I don't know which links open as downloads or where they go etc.
Like, for a very specific example of something I want to look at but am too scared - in the resources, rain and sadness has posted a link to the pph 2022 edition. I WANT TO READ THIS MORE THAN ANYTHING!!! Plus a bunch of other stuff on here. So I read threads like Stan's & the SN bible because they just open, there's nothing else in purple to click.
But what happens on an iPhone if you hit that very specific link???? The Pph link in resources that rain and sadness posted??
Does it just open a page, in browser, easy to hide? Or does it open as a download or a file or anything like that? Anything that could possibly leave a digital trail on phones that aren't "supposed to be" linked in any way, but still are.
They. Just. Still. Fucking. Are.
I gotta get to the geniuses but I can't medically drive & it's gonna take a while & I can't wait that long. Today was horrific. I didn't think it was possible to be more sure of the decision to CTB than where I was already at, that it was outside daily circumstances now, but honestly I am sure to my bones, to my core, to my goddamn cells. So it anyone with an iPhone & some privacy & some skills wants to open that link & pay attention where it opens & how, but also if you can find traces in files or downloads or if it automatically goes to the cloud or anything (I don't know enough to know what the possibilities are) & let me know, I would be beyond thrilled. I can't take this much longer. I just can't do it. But I can't fuck it up. It's an endless endless vicious cycle of bullshit. Sorry for rant. If anyone has answers, yay. Thank you to the moon & back & around again. And if not, that's ok & sorry for the rant & for being so shit at this & needing so much help - I feel helpless & hopeless & geez…. I dunno, I'm so sorry