Insulting to be human

[Disintegration]

I was wondering if anyone else feels that it is insulting to be human? Maybe it is difficult to understand, but I haven't seen it anywhere else that someone has expressed this feeling. I believe that having this experience and going through these motions is insulting to me and my intelligence. Perhaps this is an egocentric view, but I can't help but feel like I'm above being human somehow. I don't enjoy this and I find the limitations frustrating, to say the least. I find it boring, repetitive and arduous to take on this form and interact with the world.

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

From a Buddhist perspective, it sounds like suffering due to non-acceptance. From a Christian perspective, it sounds like blasphemy. From a psychological perspective, it sounds like grandiosity or the expression of a narcissistic wound. From a neurological perspective, it sounds like you have a brain tumor. From a conspiracy theory perspective, it sounds like you are a Reptilian trapped in a human body.

 

[Disintegration]

From a Buddhist perspective, it sounds like suffering due to non-acceptance. From a Christian perspective, it sounds like blasphemy. From a psychological perspective, it sounds like grandiosity or the expression of a narcissistic wound. From a neurological perspective, it sounds like you have a brain tumor. From a conspiracy theory perspective, it sounds like you are a Reptilian trapped in a human body.

Everything you've said makes sense in some way. Something must be terribly wrong with me if others can't understand this perspective. Based on a quick search I haven't seen this discussed anywhere else. This is part of what drives my suicidal ideation. It is a bit disturbing that I find the experience of being human to be grotesque. Thanks for replying... it's something at least.

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

I recognize I wasn't sensitive or compassionate enough.

It was my tongue-in-cheek way of saying that all of these perspectives are judgmental and negating, with the exception of Buddhism. And of course the last one was silly.

I better recognize now that it may feel less isolating if someone else here shares such feelings, and I hope if there is a current member who does, that they'll respond.

Personally, I would step out of all frameworks that negate. I would stop viewing myself as wrong, nor seek to be right, but just accept and explore it.

Such a stance reminds me of when I used to binge and purge. After many years, I decided to just stay full when I binged, and experience the feelings. Occasionally, I would still purge, and I'd forgive myself. Over time, both acts lost their power.

Suicidal ideation can be the same way, getting bigger the more it is repressed and fought against. Then folks come here and engage with it, researching and planning and writing letters, etc., and suicide shrinks to a more manageable size, and what it was previously blocking has a chance to emerge. Sometimes what was obscured still leads to suicide, and sometimes it leads to continuing to live.

 

[Disintegration]

I recognize I wasn't sensitive or compassionate enough.

It was my tongue-in-cheek way of saying that all of these perspectives are judgmental and negating, with the exception of Buddhism. And of course the last one was silly.

I better recognize now that it may feel less isolating if someone else here shares such feelings, and I hope if there is a current member who does, that they'll respond.

Personally, I would step out of all frameworks that negate. I would stop viewing myself as wrong, nor seek to be right, but just accept and explore it.

Such a stance reminds me of when I used to binge and purge. After many years, I decided to just stay full when I binged, and experience the feelings. Occasionally, I would still purge, and I'd forgive myself. Over time, both acts lost their power.

Suicidal ideation can be the same way, getting bigger the more it is repressed and fought against. Then folks come here and engage with it, researching and planning and writing letters, etc., and suicide shrinks to a more manageable size, and what it was previously blocking has a chance to emerge. Sometimes what was obscured still leads to suicide, and sometimes it leads to continuing to live.

I guess that is what I'm trying to do. I'm not trying to fight the thoughts as much as I'm trying to understand them. I'm very comfortable with my view, I just can't understand why many others wouldn't feel the same way. Why wouldn't people find it insulting to be this organism that eats, shits, fucks, labors, is bound by the laws of physics, doomed to live this absurd existence, etc... Our consciousness should be revered in a much more respectful way. Whatever force or higher intelligence that gave us sentience clearly wanted to diminish us in some way.

Thanks for trying to help and being sensitive to this odd issue.

 

[Life sucks]

Yes specially how I know that being a human is just following a flow and species stupidity. Additionally, knowing how life is shitty and inherently flawed. I oppose it completely and won't bring any new human to this world.

Other than that, I feel existence generally is like an insult to anyone with consciousness. Most people try to ignore or don't see the truth while its clear but life is just limitations within limitations and problems within problems. A very flawed biological body with much needs and problems or threats trapped in space/time and facing endless problems and almost always fall in contradictions. For example, they tell you that you must choose one path in life but thats stupid and you can't even go back and change, even if you want to expand in your path, you are restricted by time. So I can't have endless time for my hobbies, what a fucking shit is life.

 

[CynicalHopelessness]

See the title under my avatar lol. I don't feel any attachment to humanity anymore. Somehow being human is irrelevant to my life, like there's a way in which I'm always alone.

 

[enjolras]

I think it was Nietzsche's quote : "God is dead due to his love of the human beings".
Out of curiosity, are you feeling deceived by an excess of empathy towards the human race ? Or is it just straight criticism with zero equilibration ?
You may be of a divine essence, get tested without waiting, fuck this Covid19, skip the waiting line. We were waiting for you, dear saviour

I ran out of energy for today but I used to absolutely relate to the disgrace of belonging, with pity. But I ended up attributing it to the education that was forced into me, many times preaching a biased programming on many topics, whose human's superiority is one (but it could have been about falsifying the history and feeding me with patriotism views also, etc). In the end, continuing to suffer would be my own fault, when I'm unable to retrieve reason by putting things into perspective.

On the most cultural european TV channel, I came across a documentary arguing how the human race is nothing special in the grand scheme of things, versus both macro and micro scales. It was the best deconstructing info I was fed with since a long time, so damn right. It gave me some relief by wiping even further pain away, because my position felt again centred in the middle of it all with more humility, not above, leading to a misunderstanding of the paths followed. It confirmed, adding to my interpretation, that humans are vastly unaware creatures with flaws, victims of their own evolution, not responsible of their failures. Forgiveness hit me and it helped (Do the hospital test between christianity and buddhism ?)

From a Buddhist perspective, it sounds like suffering due to non-acceptance. From a Christian perspective, it sounds like blasphemy. From a psychological perspective, it sounds like grandiosity or the expression of a narcissistic wound. From a neurological perspective, it sounds like you have a brain tumor. From a conspiracy theory perspective, it sounds like you are a Reptilian trapped in a human body.

See, these stances resonate. Think I was stricken by a few. Hope to have chased away some or most, expect maybe the helpful lizard tumour !

Our consciousness should be revered in a much more respectful way. Whatever force or higher intelligence that gave us sentience clearly wanted to diminish us in some way.

What if it did to give you the opportunity to elevate with ascension ?

————



There's a wheel at the bottom caption to set subtitles to auto-translate (very good translation) in english (try to do it 2 times in a row for english to become available)

Most vibrant tribute to the magic of life in general. It should have been the education to get for my well being. I was longing for the truth, instead I was lied to, then I became judgemental around me, lost respect to the world, because my observations did not match the expectations of my specie I was taught with.
It did distribute me some comfort, if it can help...

 

[Epsilon0]

Grotesque is indeed a perfect description for all the atrocities that happen every second all around us.

I am not so much appalled by the meaningless marathon we run on our hamster wheels, but by the pain we inflict on each other during this frantic march: abuse, war, torture and so on.

The only acceptable position for me is misanthropy, and the only course of action that I endorse is one that adds as little pain to the world as possible.

I think it was Nietzsche's quote : "God is dead due to his love of the human beings".
Out of curiosity, are you feeling deceived by an excess of empathy towards the human race ? Or is it just straight criticism with zero equilibration ?
You may be of a divine essence, get tested without waiting, fuck this Covid19, skip the waiting line. We were waiting for you, dear saviour

I ran out of energy for today but I used to absolutely relate to the disgrace of belonging, with pity. But I ended up attributing it to the education that was forced into me, many times preaching a biased programming on many topics, whose human's superiority is one (but it could have been about falsifying the history and feeding me with patriotism views also, etc). In the end, continuing to suffer would be my own fault, when I'm unable to retrieve reason by putting things into perspective.

On the most cultural european TV channel, I came across a documentary arguing how the human race is nothing special in the grand scheme of things, versus both macro and micro scales. It was the best deconstructing info I was fed with since a long time, so damn right. It gave me some relief by wiping even further pain away, because my position felt again centred in the middle of it all with more humility, not above, leading to a misunderstanding of the paths followed. It confirmed, adding to my interpretation, that humans are vastly unaware creatures with flaws, victims of their own evolution, not responsible of their failures. Forgiveness hit me and it helped (Do the hospital test between christianity and buddhism ?)


See, these stances resonate. Think I was stricken by a few. Hope to have chased away some or most, expect maybe the helpful lizard tumour !



What if it did to give you the opportunity to elevate with ascension ?

————



There's a wheel at the bottom caption to set subtitles to auto-translate (very good translation) in english (try to do it 2 times in a row for english to become available)

Most vibrant tribute to the magic of general life. It should have been the education to get for my well being. I was longing for the truth, instead I was lied to, then I became judgemental around me, lost respect to the world, because my observations did not match the expectations of my specie I was taught with.
It did distribute me some comfort, if it can help...

Arte does indeed have the best documentaries.

 

[Disintegration]

I watched it. I can see how this changes a persons perspective on things. I believe I have a healthy outlook on what I am. I'm vegan and definitely do not ascribe to any form of speciesism. I understand the insignificance and significance of humanity in my own way.

I guess I feel contempt for whatever allowed me consciousness. I do not want this experience and I can't help but feel like I'm being fucked with somehow. I don't appreciate being toyed with or manipulated, part of some cosmic science experiment. My sense of self awareness shouldn't be mocked by giving me this insignificant life. At the core of it all, I'm seething with rage towards my parents and creation in general.

Suicide does seem to be the only form of rebellion suitable enough to combat whatever has decided to mess with me. I don't take being victimized in this manner lightly and oblivion is at least an end to this particular stream of consciousness.

I think it was Nietzsche's quote : "God is dead due to his love of the human beings".
Out of curiosity, are you feeling deceived by an excess of empathy towards the human race ? Or is it just straight criticism with zero equilibration ?
You may be of a divine essence, get tested without waiting, fuck this Covid19, skip the waiting line. We were waiting for you, dear saviour

I ran out of energy for today but I used to absolutely relate to the disgrace of belonging, with pity. But I ended up attributing it to the education that was forced into me, many times preaching a biased programming on many topics, whose human's superiority is one (but it could have been about falsifying the history and feeding me with patriotism views also, etc). In the end, continuing to suffer would be my own fault, when I'm unable to retrieve reason by putting things into perspective.

On the most cultural european TV channel, I came across a documentary arguing how the human race is nothing special in the grand scheme of things, versus both macro and micro scales. It was the best deconstructing info I was fed with since a long time, so damn right. It gave me some relief by wiping even further pain away, because my position felt again centred in the middle of it all with more humility, not above, leading to a misunderstanding of the paths followed. It confirmed, adding to my interpretation, that humans are vastly unaware creatures with flaws, victims of their own evolution, not responsible of their failures. Forgiveness hit me and it helped (Do the hospital test between christianity and buddhism ?)


See, these stances resonate. Think I was stricken by a few. Hope to have chased away some or most, expect maybe the helpful lizard tumour !



What if it did to give you the opportunity to elevate with ascension ?

————



There's a wheel at the bottom caption to set subtitles to auto-translate (very good translation) in english (try to do it 2 times in a row for english to become available)

Most vibrant tribute to the magic of life in general. It should have been the education to get for my well being. I was longing for the truth, instead I was lied to, then I became judgemental around me, lost respect to the world, because my observations did not match the expectations of my specie I was taught with.
It did distribute me some comfort, if it can help...

Thank you for your efforts.

 

[Epsilon0]

The little alien inside whose science project we live our petty lives, is going to get a big intergalatic ice-cream after school, and accidentaly drop in on the Earth, drowing us all in green goo.

Nice


@Disintegration

"I don't appreciate being toyed with or manipulated, part of some cosmic science experiment"

I think it was Nietzsche's quote : "God is dead due to his love of the human beings".
Out of curiosity, are you feeling deceived by an excess of empathy towards the human race ? Or is it just straight criticism with zero equilibration ?
You may be of a divine essence, get tested without waiting, fuck this Covid19, skip the waiting line. We were waiting for you, dear saviour

I ran out of energy for today but I used to absolutely relate to the disgrace of belonging, with pity. But I ended up attributing it to the education that was forced into me, many times preaching a biased programming on many topics, whose human's superiority is one (but it could have been about falsifying the history and feeding me with patriotism views also, etc). In the end, continuing to suffer would be my own fault, when I'm unable to retrieve reason by putting things into perspective.

On the most cultural european TV channel, I came across a documentary arguing how the human race is nothing special in the grand scheme of things, versus both macro and micro scales. It was the best deconstructing info I was fed with since a long time, so damn right. It gave me some relief by wiping even further pain away, because my position felt again centred in the middle of it all with more humility, not above, leading to a misunderstanding of the paths followed. It confirmed, adding to my interpretation, that humans are vastly unaware creatures with flaws, victims of their own evolution, not responsible of their failures. Forgiveness hit me and it helped (Do the hospital test between christianity and buddhism ?)


See, these stances resonate. Think I was stricken by a few. Hope to have chased away some or most, expect maybe the helpful lizard tumour !



What if it did to give you the opportunity to elevate with ascension ?

————



There's a wheel at the bottom caption to set subtitles to auto-translate (very good translation) in english (try to do it 2 times in a row for english to become available)

Most vibrant tribute to the magic of life in general. It should have been the education to get for my well being. I was longing for the truth, instead I was lied to, then I became judgemental around me, lost respect to the world, because my observations did not match the expectations of my specie I was taught with.
It did distribute me some comfort, if it can help...

Nietzsche was an atheist and the word God in this famous quote does not mean God, but rather Christian morality.

 

[Disintegration]

The little alien inside whose science project we live our petty lives, is going to get a big intergalatic ice-cream after school, and accidentaly drop in on the Earth, drowing us all in green goo.

Nice


@Disintegration

"I don't appreciate being toyed with or manipulated, part of some cosmic science experiment"



Nietzsche was an atheist and the word God in this famous quote does not mean God, but rather Christian morality.

I've read Nietzsche. The Antichrist was my favorite.

 

[Epsilon0]

Moral relativism caused by the loss of the traditionalist moral compass which always pointed in the right direction, is the big tragedy of the modern individual in the western world.

Once there was no religion to set down the game rules (i.e. once god was dead) morality and truth were up for grabs, and we were left with a huge void and a cacophony of ideologies.

It's practically impossible for us today to find a stable ground on which to build concepts such as justice, right, wrong, truth, death.

 

[CynicalHopelessness]

It's practically impossible for us today to find a stable ground on which to build concepts such as justice, right, wrong, truth, death.

Maybe it's time to shed some of those concepts, then? There's been insane amount of suffering inflicted for the name of justice, right, wrong and truth. Not sure about death.

 

[Epsilon0]

I've read Nietzsche. The Antichrist was my favorite.

"Mankind surely does not represent an evolution toward a better or stronger or higher level, as progress is now understood. This "progress" is merely a modern idea, which is to say, a false idea. The European of today, in his essential worth, falls far below the European of the Renaissance; the process of evolution does not necessarily mean elevation, enhancement, strengthening."



Quotes from the Antichrist

"—I cannot, at this place, avoid a sigh. There are days when I am visited by a feeling blacker than the blackest melancholy—contempt of man. Let me leave no doubt as to what I despise, whom I despise: it is the man of today, the man with whom I am unhappily contemporaneous."

He must have been a lot of fun at parties


Oh and my personal favourite:

Wear gloves when you open the Old Testament.

(Or something along those lines)

 

[Disintegration]

I'm glad to find like minded, intelligent people here. Suicidal communities seem to attract some of the brightest minds in an unconventional sense.

 

[enjolras]

Grotesque is indeed a perfect description for all the atrocities that happen every second all around us.

I am not so much appalled by the meaningless marathon we run on our hamster wheels, but by the pain we inflict on each other during this frantic march: abuse, war, torture and so on.

The only acceptable position for me is misanthropy, and the only course of action that I endorse is one that adds as little pain to the world as possible.

Ha ha. Now this has became how I picture you, how you spend your days.



(Woody Allen movie. The old guy is a hypocondriac mysanthrope who oftentimes tries to jump out of the window impulsively and fails ...then continues to share his torn bittersweet views on life at the pub and dinners)



——-

So would like to participate more, but crawling under fatigue. To my regret, let's speak another day.

 

[Epsilon0]

Ha ha. Now this has became how I picture you, how you spend your days.



(Woody Allen movie. The old guy is a hypocondriac mysanthrope who oftentimes tries to jump out of the window impulsively and fails ...then continues to share his torn bittersweet views on life at the pub and dinners)



——-

So would like to participate more, but crawling under fatigue. To my regret, let's speak another day.

You are speaking to the biggest Woody Allen fan :-)

"If God created this world, he is an underachiever."

"So what are you doing on Saturday?
I am going to kill myself.
Are you free on Friday?"


@enjolras


I love the music in the Larry David scene. Thank you for posting it.

Woody Allen had the best soundtracks in film history, wouldn't you say. Each time I listn to George Gershwin I see to heard Allen saying "you know... " and talking in his idiosyncratic, desperate manner.

"I can't express anger, you know. I grow a tumour instead."

 

[Mr2005]

What I find more insulting is some of the people that class as human. They look like one and that's about it

 

[Blue Starz]

What I find more insulting is some of the people that class as human. They look like one and that's about it

i know...right?! when they use jargon such as "inhumane" referencing animal abuse (which is sad)... i wonder how being "humane" is a supposedly a good standard of comparison?!


@Disintegration ...

You're not egocentric at all; You are simply sensing that you are not the average brain-washed, slave to social conditioning & you have risen above cultural indoctrination.

My point for your question is, You are rising above brainwashing or conditioning, you have "woken up" from the system.

You're not alone either.

i'm a Christian btw (daily prayer, not just a title), and many of us frequently discuss and refer to the insanity of "modern" culture, especially in the United States which has spiraled out of control with violence, selfishness, rudeness, cruel & nonsensical 'laws' that favor the rich, and inappropriate unhealthy behaviors.

My personal opinion, including from my Christian perspective, is that while technically everyone has a Soul, and although many are trying to humbly develop their's (as I also do)... there are way too many people who almost seem like metaphorical zombies who have been programmed (not literal zombies of course), or demonically possessed people with so much cruelty (even cruelty to innocent kind people),
or many that are a combination of the two above & might as well be primitive animals with a soul that is the size of a black dot, a small as pepper.

They have no conscience, they have no intelligence, They only operate on their most primitive physical desires, and they are 100% selfish. They care not for the impact or damage they inflict on others.

If you're reacting with disgust to any of these types of people, again, it just demonstrates that you have awakened.

Plenty of people here on SS (including the wonderful moderators / staff who are very intelligent) have the way above average capacity to actually think, contemplate, consider different understandings, and reach beyond what is indoctrinated.

Most People explore intellectually on SS, which is beautiful.

 

[Shinbu]

I found being human inconvenient rather than insulting.

 

[Deleted member 1465]

I guess that is what I'm trying to do. I'm not trying to fight the thoughts as much as I'm trying to understand them. I'm very comfortable with my view, I just can't understand why many others wouldn't feel the same way. Why wouldn't people find it insulting to be this organism that eats, shits, fucks, labors, is bound by the laws of physics, doomed to live this absurd existence, etc... Our consciousness should be revered in a much more respectful way. Whatever force or higher intelligence that gave us sentience clearly wanted to diminish us in some way.

Thanks for trying to help and being sensitive to this odd issue.

It's one of the reasons we have developed religions. Because we have a psychological urge to believe that we are more than merely animals subject to nature's whims and the laws of physics.
And it's perfectly natural to want to be more than the very thing we are part of. In fact it's an emotional expression of the very thing that makes the evolutionary wheels go round.