Venting insomnia

[adventurer]

it is 2am. i attempted to go to sleep first at 10:30pm. i have since then done nothing but lay still and gotten up once to use the bathroom. how in the actual fuck am i supposed to live with this. i'm dead tired but i'm wide awake. this feels like torture. i want to go to bed. i want to sleep. i NEED to sleep. there is no way i can survive if this is the way that i have to live. i already know that i won't close my eyes until 7. in the meantime there's nothing i can do.

absolutely fuck this.

 

[keitaro]

that sounds extremely frustrating. i hate it when i get behind on sleep. it causes so many issues.

 

[idk1]

Been there exactly. It is indeed torture.

You can try sleeping pills, but for me Clonazepam (benzo) helped a lot.

 

[annique]

i feel you! i'm heading to bed just now. put on some soothing music or sounds of rain, maybe that helps you to fall asleep
i know how tortuous it is not being able to sleep properly

 

[Soulless Angel]

I have given up with sleep! I just wait now til my eyes give up, then I attempt it!

 

[chloramine]

I feel you. Insomnia is brutal, from the hours of frustrated trying to sleep, all the way until the next day when you're trying to function on no sleep.

I don't know if you're looking for suggestions, but I've found asmr can sometimes be helpful? Personally it helps to engage my brain enough to keep it from making things worse and it can be relaxing.

I hope you're able to get some quality sleep soon.

 

[lights_are_on]

it is 2am. i attempted to go to sleep first at 10:30pm. i have since then done nothing but lay still and gotten up once to use the bathroom. how in the actual fuck am i supposed to live with this. i'm dead tired but i'm wide awake. this feels like torture. i want to go to bed. i want to sleep. i NEED to sleep. there is no way i can survive if this is the way that i have to live. i already know that i won't close my eyes until 7. in the meantime there's nothing i can do.

absolutely fuck this.

Insomnia sucks ass. I really sympathise with you. Hope you have a good nights sleep soon! I managed to fix my life long insomnia recently and I wish you can do the same. If you want to vent anytime my pm's are always open

 

[Werewolf]

I know exactly what you're going through. Try just accepting the fact that you can't sleep,
go up and do menial things like eat or clean something, don't watch stuff on the phone/tv whatever. I know it's difficult but most of the time you being stressed about not being able to sleep is what keeps you from going to sleep. Bensos/alcohol help, but not a long term solution.

Once went 4 days without sleep, laying on the couch watching planet earth episode about underwater caves and creatures started manifesting in the rock formations and crawling out of the tv, scary as fuck at the time but quite humorous in retrospect. Reality gets pretty blurry after ~48h awake. I'm on 38 hours atm.

 

[Fadeawaaaay]

That's awful… The only thing I can suggest is exercise, yoga, meditation, Sleeping pills and/or diet (cutting out caffeine).

 

[Ethereal Knight]

life-long insomniac speaking here. mine was fixed with amitriptyline. but I also heard people who had success with mirtazapine and many other antidepressants. this class of drugs don't cause as much dependence as benzodiazepines or Z-drugs. they do have side effects however, but at the end of the day, it's usually better to tolerate these instead of tolerating the consequences of sleep deprivation.

there's also a "hidden" cause of insomnia which people often dismiss, which is being a caffeine slow metabolizer (that's genetic, so no one can change that). these people (including me) should not consume any caffeine - not even small amounts from cocoa, chocolate or soda. try cutting all caffeine sources for 30 days and pay attention on how you feel.

 

[FuneralCry]

That sounds so horrifying. I know that it is so awful being unable to sleep and it seems as though in a life like this there is no escape from suffering. I'm sorry that you have to endure this.

 

[Blackhole999]

no dormir por una semana fue la peor experiencia de mi vida tomo diazepam dsd entontonces te recomiendo que consigas alguno recetado o en el mercado negro

 

[adventurer]

life-long insomniac speaking here. mine was fixed with amitriptyline. but I also heard people who had success with mirtazapine and many other antidepressants. this class of drugs don't cause as much dependence as benzodiazepines or Z-drugs. they do have side effects however, but at the end of the day, it's usually better to tolerate these instead of tolerating the consequences of sleep deprivation.

there's also a "hidden" cause of insomnia which people often dismiss, which is being a caffeine slow metabolizer (that's genetic, so no one can change that). these people (including me) should not consume any caffeine - not even small amounts from cocoa, chocolate or soda. try cutting all caffeine sources for 30 days and pay attention on how you feel.

my doctors won't prescribe me anything heavy. they've always been dodgy about it and only given me surface level meds you can get pretty much anywhere. i'm not sure what the reasoning is.

 

[Ethereal Knight]

my doctors won't prescribe me anything heavy. they've always been dodgy about it and only given me surface level meds you can get pretty much anywhere. i'm not sure what the reasoning is.

why is that? maybe they're afraid that you're gonna abuse the drugs recreationally or attempt to suicide by overdose?

mirtazapine should be an easy prescription to get. it's a substance that is not as controlled as benzodiazepines or opioids. 7,5 or 15mg and you get your night of sleep. maybe 30-45mg if the goal is to use it as an anti-depressant.

same for amitriptyline, although this one is more dangerous in overdoses compared to other TCAs. anything between 25 and 150mg can work for insomnia.

both of these make you gain a lot weight non-stop (not just in the beginning) and have other side effects, but that's better than not sleeping.

also, I'm suggesting you talk to your doctors about these drugs because I'm guessing you have already done the basic stuff (sleep hygiene).

using soft dimmed lights after 6 PM and being in complete darkness between 10 PM and 5 AM.

using blueblocking glasses after 6 PM.

going out outdoors immediately after you wake up, so the sun can shine on your face and "tell your body" that this is daytime (or using very strong indoor lights if the sun has not appeared yet but you want to be awaken at that time of the morning).

cutting caffeine down to zero

avoiding heavy meals at night

avoiding seed oils, flour, sugar and junk food in general

using healthy carbohydrates (like bananas) 3 hours before going to bed, to help relax

supplementing magnesium (malate, citrate, glycinate or threonate)

having a room that is cool (cold), dark, safe, silent and confortable

doing physical exercise, especially in the morning

etc...