Story In Memoriam

[gingerplum]

Last Monday night, a member of the SS community asserted her right to exit on her own terms. This is unverified, but the timeline of her communication indicates that in all likelihood she has CTB.

Groovy123 joined SS on August 13 of this year. She was resolute about taking charge of her own fate, but for most personal details, she held her cards close to her vest. What little we know of her was revealed in a few posts and a handful of PMs:

Lost my mind & health after surgery.

My health is only getting worse and now I'm over life time medication.

Tried different methods like antifreeze, partial, & full but none work.

Went to a mental health facility for a week. Unfortunately no matter what the pain and things I'm dealing with are still here.

Without specific details, Groovy was struggling with serious health issues, marital problems, and financial struggles. Her living situation was very precarious.

She was sweet, friendly, and extremely polite in her PMs. She thought I was British, and she called me "Ms. Gingerplum," both of which completely charmed me. At times, she seemed so guileless and candid that at one point I questioned her age, but as it turned out, she was just an unaffected young adult.

I couldn't help but like her.

On Monday afternoon, she reached out to chat via PM with @Blackjack.
Later that night, she reached out again, stating her SN had arrived that day. At 10:57, she wrote:

I'm attempting it. I can't keep putting it off. No more what if's; I know I don't want to be here, and I have the opportunity.

This was completely unexpected and surprising. Despite @Blackjack questioning her about the impulsivity of her decision, and urging to wait until she had antacids and antiemetics, by 11:36 pm she said:

11:32 I ingested it. Stomach is starting to rumble and not going to lie I'm starting to get tired.

At 11:46 she reported a rapid heart rate and feeling tired.

Her last message was at 11:52, stating that her head was starting to hurt.

For those collecting data, Groovy weighed 112 lbs and reported taking 15 gms SN. More notably, she ingested the SN on a full stomach, with no acid reducers and no antiemetics whatsoever.

A heartfelt thank-you to @Blackjack, who continued to check in, long after Groovy had sent her last message. We should all be so lucky to have a Blackjack by our side in those final moments.

 

[wendydong1]

Hope she is in peace

 

[White_Room293]

This shit hurts a lot to talk about. I didn't know jack about her but she's back into the dirt and her pain is gone now.

 

[SinisterKid]

Part of me always wants to cry when we lose anyone from this place, the other half wants to sing and dance in celebration at the person hopefully being at peace or at the very least no longer suffering.

RIP Groovy.

 

[eightyninedee]

I hope she is at peace now, and found some comfort in this community in her final hours

 

[Blackjack]

Thanks for posting this @gingerplum. While I had never chatted with @Groovy123 before that day, the little interaction I had with her she was informed and resolute. But clearly in a tremendous amount of pain. She just didn't want to be alone in her final minutes and I felt humbled that she reached out to me. I have thought about her every day since and hope her passing was peaceful.

 

[wendydong1]

This shit hurts a lot to talk about. I didn't know jack about her but she's back into the dirt and her pain is gone now.

I think we know that nobody deserve the pain that she felt. That is the sad part. But it was what it was. At least she is no longer in pain now. That's the good part.

 

[woxihuanni]

I never talked to her one on one, but hope that she has found peace. She seems to have been a very graceful lady.

 

[LonelyLight]

Part of me always wants to cry when we lose anyone from this place, the other half wants to sing and dance in celebration at the person hopefully being at peace or at the very least no longer suffering.

RIP Groovy.

You hit the nail on the head there!! Exactly how I feel reading posts like this.

Hope you found peace Groovy

 

[woodstacker]

Last Monday night, a member of the SS community asserted her right to exit on her own terms. This is unverified, but the timeline of her communication indicates that in all likelihood she has CTB.

Groovy123 joined SS on August 13 of this year. She was resolute about taking charge of her own fate, but for most personal details, she held her cards close to her vest. What little we know of her was revealed in a few posts and a handful of PMs:

Lost my mind & health after surgery.

My health is only getting worse and now I'm over life time medication.

Tried different methods like antifreeze, partial, & full but none work.

Went to a mental health facility for a week. Unfortunately no matter what the pain and things I'm dealing with are still here.

Without specific details, Groovy was struggling with serious health issues, marital problems, and financial struggles. Her living situation was very precarious.

She was sweet, friendly, and extremely polite in her PMs. She thought I was British, and she called me "Ms. Gingerplum," both of which completely charmed me. At times, she seemed so guileless and candid that at one point I questioned her age, but as it turned out, she was just an unaffected young adult.

I couldn't help but like her.

On Monday afternoon, she reached out to chat via PM with @Blackjack.
Later that night, she reached out again, stating her SN had arrived that day. At 10:57, she wrote:

I'm attempting it. I can't keep putting it off. No more what if's; I know I don't want to be here, and I have the opportunity.

This was completely unexpected and surprising. Despite @Blackjack questioning her about the impulsivity of her decision, and urging to wait until she had antacids and antiemetics, by 11:36 pm she said:

11:32 I ingested it. Stomach is starting to rumble and not going to lie I'm starting to get tired.

At 11:46 she reported a rapid heart rate and feeling tired.

Her last message was at 11:52, stating that her head was starting to hurt.

For those collecting data, Groovy weighed 112 lbs and reported taking 15 gms SN. More notably, she ingested the SN on a full stomach, with no acid reducers and no antiemetics whatsoever.

A heartfelt thank-you to @Blackjack, who continued to check in, long after Groovy had sent her last message. We should all be so lucky to have a Blackjack by our side in those final moments.

Heartfelt kudos to all. The CTB stories are unfortunately recurrent and tormenting. In our own good intentions we try our best to look out for one another.

However, if there's any solace for our community, it's knowing that her physical suffering is no more and that she left knowing there's a fine community that really cared for her.

stacy

 

[Lefty]

May she rest in peace.

 

[Seagirl]

Thanks for posting this @gingerplum. While I had never chatted with @Groovy123 before that day, the little interaction I had with her she was informed and resolute. But clearly in a tremendous amount of pain. She just didn't want to be alone in her final minutes and I felt humbled that she reached out to me. I have thought about her every day since and hope her passing was peaceful.

R

R

Really kind of you Blackjack.

 

[Blackjack]

Really kind of you Blackjack.

I know someone here would do the same for me.

 

[Stan]

It highlights the best in this forum. I only spoke briefly to Groovy over pm. She was focused on her goal and showed quiet strength in her resolve. Didn't want intervention, just help in making sure she wasn't going to hurt herself needlessly, so I would class that as 'sound mind'.

To hear that she had comfort and company from @Blackjack in possibly her darkest hour is one of the unmeasurable benefits of being in such a community.

 

[gingerplum]

It highlights the best in this forum. I only spoke briefly to Groovy over pm. She was focused on her goal and showed quiet strength in her resolve. Didn't want intervention, just help in making sure she wasn't going to hurt herself needlessly, so I would class that as 'sound mind'.

To hear that she had comfort and company from @Blackjack in possibly her darkest hour is one one unmeasurable benefits of being in such a community.

Hear, hear!

 

[Taki]

Encouraging that she didn't have to spend 48 hours with the full SN routine. RIP

 

[Dubs]

I wonder how long it takes someone to get back to ss after a failed attempt. Not to be a Debbie downer but it seems difficult to know if she succeeded or not, and whether her sn technique was sufficient.

 

[gingerplum]

I wonder how long it takes someone to get back to ss after a failed attempt. Not to be a Debbie downer but it seems difficult to know if she succeeded or not, and whether her sn technique was sufficient.

Again, we can't be 100% sure, but given her size, the amount she took, the fact that she kept it down for 30 minutes and was drowsy, and her stating there was no chance of discovery, it seems like a foregone conclusion.

I feel confident enough to say the evidence almost certainly indicates the outcome.

 

[Stan]

I'd like to say thank you @gingerplum for taking the time to create this. Your generosity of spirit never fails to touch me.

Whether members are successful or not, whether a failed attempt needs to be pulled apart, analysed and critiqued in in open forum, whether doubt about the veracity of whether someone is real or not, lets remember one thing. There is a person in this story, a person who has reached a point in their lives that this is the only option, no matter how unsavoury others would see it. I would hope we could all give the same respect and support to them as we would wish upon ourselves.

 

[pandora]

The kindness, compassion, and love evident in this forum is the main reason I finally made an account after months of lurking. It's humbling that even in the darkest moments, we are able to give of ourselves when another is in need.

 

[gingerplum]

I'd like to say thank you @gingerplum for taking the time to create this. Your generosity of spirit never fails to touch me.

Whether members are successful or not, whether a failed attempt needs to be pulled apart, analysed and critiqued in in open forum, whether doubt about the veracity of whether someone is real or not, lets remember one thing. There is a person in this story, a person who has reached a point in their lives that this is the only option, no matter how unsavoury others would see it. I would hope we could all give the same respect and support to them as we would wish upon ourselves.

Thank you, Stan. I think everyone deserves a thread dedicated to who they were and what they brought to the community.

There are a couple of very difficult exits on the horizon, at least one of which I will be relying heavily on you for.

 

[Blackjack]

@gingerplum & @Stan, you 2 are both class acts and this forum is better because of you. You have become my most trusted confidants here and I will miss you when I go. I would have loved to hang out, drink & shoot the shit together in another time & place.

 

[JimFord99]

Yeah, thanks for sharing this with us, gingerplum. Sad, but hopefully groovy found peace.

 

[blackflag1]

I say she likely pulled it off and is over on the other side. The rapid heart rate is the body's attempt to compensate for oxygen deprivation, the end result of SN as more of the hemoglobin converts from ferrous to ferric iron content.

 

[gingerplum]

Like I said, BJ... I am convinced that, in any other circumstances, we'd be kicked out of a bar because of our raucous laughter and inability to KEEP IT DOWN.

I have formed a number of friendships here, but only a couple of real "insta-frienships" when the other person and I just clicked. Something about the way you write, especially your sharp wit, makes your words have their own cadence and inflection in my mind.

I just know irl we would go together like peanut butter & jelly. Or maybe stuffed olives and martinis... your choice

 

[woodstacker]

I'd like to say thank you @gingerplum for taking the time to create this. Your generosity of spirit never fails to touch me.

Whether members are successful or not, whether a failed attempt needs to be pulled apart, analysed and critiqued in in open forum, whether doubt about the veracity of whether someone is real or not, lets remember one thing. There is a person in this story, a person who has reached a point in their lives that this is the only option, no matter how unsavoury others would see it. I would hope we could all give the same respect and support to them as we would wish upon ourselves.

Nice @Stan! I have shared VERY similar thoughts via pm to @gingerplum, who is quick to post an uplifting take that enlightens a mournful event.

Thanks @Stan for sharing your heartfelt thanks to a member, who keeps us together. Posts like @gingerplum's and your's are indeed "humanizing."

stacy

 

[Sweet emotion]

I hope she is in peace.

 

[snowball]

It's good to read that there are people here who are serious about others. Such solidarity is amazing to see.

 

[toxicfox]

Rest In Peace, see you in week or two there angel

 

[not-2-b-the-answer]

Thank you Gingerplum for your thread about Groovy. I'm not always on here but I do remember seeing her screen name.
So nice to read all the posts for her. I hope she is finally at peace.
It's nice to see that people care about each other … seems people are nicer here than IRL. (For the most part)
If you end up finding peace before I do, you will be missed. Also to Blackjack for being with her in her final moments.
You are both so AWESOME !!!