Imagination more painful than reality?

[jbleakness]

I keep having my chosen method of full suspension hanging playing in my mind on repeat. Relentlessly.

I try to visualize every single moment leading up to it. Obsessing over every detail and action.

The biggest part I think of though obviously is the pain that will hit me as soon as I step off my stool and the ropes grip tightens just above my throat. I tell myself I'll be able to bear the pain. But I won't know for sure until I take that final leap into the unknown.

Hopefully it will be over soon. I have my date.

 

[OzymandiAsh]

I hope you find peace and freedom. Such a method does take some courage and pain tolerance. Maybe you can try some padding around the neck like a scarf or pillowcase to reduce the pain. I think with FSH things are usually over quickly.

 

[OnMyLast Legs]

FSH was my go-to method for a while. Best I could do was step off with my hands on the rope for a second. It hurts your neck big time.

Part of me still hopes I can do it. No planning, no buying, I already have the rope. It is the ready way out. But I almost certainly can't.

 

[jbleakness]

I hope you find peace and freedom. Such a method does take some courage and pain tolerance. Maybe you can try some padding around the neck like a scarf or pillowcase to reduce the pain. I think with FSH things are usually over quickly.

I figure I'll wear a hoodie backwards with the hood up. Black things out before I go.

FSH was my go-to method for a while. Best I could do was step off with my hands on the rope for a second. It hurts your neck big time.

Part of me still hopes I can do it. No planning, no buying, I already have the rope. It is the ready way out. But I almost certainly can't.

That's what I'm struggling with the initial pain. I don't think it'll last too long but probably feels like a chainsaw on the neck. I hope we find the courage

 

[OnMyLast Legs]

That's what I'm struggling with the initial pain. I don't think it'll last too long but probably feels like a chainsaw on the neck. I hope we find the courage

I'm considering attempting partial with the same anchor point I would use for full, but a little more slack in the rope. Standing (nearly). Better than a door with a handle I could hit. All I have to do is lower myself into blackout one time. Again, probably a fantasy.