Itsme19
Member
- Aug 27, 2025
- 5
I can't stop ruminating over all the things I've ruined in my life. I was supposed to be fulfilled and successful on paper. I did everything i could, i was a good student, a "role model" to other kids, an obedient Christian, and now I have absolutely nothing. I dropped out of med school bc I was extremely depressed going into it and the stress was unbearable, I gave up on finding a meaningful career bc I feel I'm gonna fail again, I broke up with the only guy that ever loved and took care of me and now I'm alone, I cut off all my friends bc I don't wanna be a burden to them and letting them see my failure is too much for me, I completely lost my faith and now have to pretend I'm a Christian so my family doesn't shun me. Now I'm trying to get a degree in something that probably has shitty job prospects and I feel myself slipping into sadness n apathy again thinking about my future. I only have a few months left to graduate. In every single situation I'm the problem and I will ruin anything that I touch. I have no anchors in my life anymore and I want to be swept away finally so I don't have to be looked at and pitied.
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