I'm so sorry for my friend

[Toxic Person]

I'm a really silent and inactiv member ik.
But i need to tell anyone about my biggest fear:

I ctb soon and i'm sad about my friend.
I know he will be sad and he never come over this bc he loves me like a lil sister.
I'm the only person that makes him feel like a normal person or do stupid stuff with him.
(His girlfriend hates me for that)

Its hurt.
I know he will be sad and its make me crazy that he isnt "important enough" (i hate me to say that) to stay alive.
This fact broke my heart tbh.
But i know he have a lot of friends and a girlfriend. So he isnt lonley.

My biggest fear is that he hates me after my cbt and he forgets me.

I wish he will understand why and doesnt hate me for that.

 

[color_me_gone]

To be honest, he could never hate you for ctb.
People who lose close friends severely grieve and miss them.
That is what he will do.
That is what all people do.
You could leave a note and explain your reasons.
That would help.
Hoping you find peace. <<<HUGS>>>

 

[Toxic Person]

To be honest, he could never hate you for ctb.
People who lose close friends severely grieve and miss them.
That is what he will do.
That is what all people do.
You could leave a note and explain your reasons.
That would help.
Hoping you find peace. <<<HUGS>>>

I hope it :/ so much..thanks

*hug back*

 

[JayZT]

Are you leaving a note? Maybe you could leave a special message for him saying how you feel.

 

[Toxic Person]

Are you leaving a note? Maybe you could leave a special message for him saying how you feel.

Yes, i write everyone a lil note.
But i'm scared about the note for him :/ Its will be a long note and i hope he will understand this.

 

[Dead_Inside]

It will be ok. He won't hate you. He will be sad and maybe he will feel angry for a little bit while he processes his grief.... but you can't helploving the people you do in this life..... you love people forever.
I still think about my friend who hung himself in high school- and that was many years ago. I still remember him. His name was Nick.
Write him a note. It will be ok.

 

[Toxic Person]

It will be ok. He won't hate you. He will be sad and maybe he will feel angry for a little bit while he processes his grief.... but you can't helploving the people you do in this life..... you love people forever.
I still think about my friend who hung himself in high school- and that was many years ago. I still remember him. His name was Nick.
Write him a note. It will be ok.

Thanks that u share ur story with me... I hope ur friend had find piece <3

I write him the longest note on this planet.. Ughb

 

[Memento Mori]

I know he will be sad and its make me crazy that he isnt "important enough" (i hate me to say that) to stay alive.
This fact broke my heart tbh.
But i know he have a lot of friends and a girlfriend. So he isnt lonley.

My biggest fear is that he hates me after my cbt and he forgets me.

I wish he will understand why and doesnt hate me for that.

So would he be important enough if you'd be together? It sounds like you should replace her if you're the only one making him feel normal...
Well thats complicated, know a bit of that feeling from both sides, just different

He will be lonely, part of him will always be...and he won't forget your suicide, maybe not even a single day. For making him understand you should talk cause leaving a note could throw up just more questions, at least try to talk to him a bit before leaving a death note as last words.
People can love each other to the maximum but that still doesn't have to be an important reason not to CTB, doesn't matter if it has something to do with each other or just with the own life itself...dying together sounds quite romantic but I couldn't take my beloved one with me, even if I have to be alone in afterlife bc of that. Thats the price and it's never easy to understand or to live with for the opposite person

Damn we have a hell of a struggle with all this existance shit

 

[21Neberg]

(I love your profile picture so much <3)

You really care about your friend, it shows how great of a human being you are :-). Maybe you could not only write a note, but also record a video especially for him to see? It's more personal I think. You could record the video, and then use an online e-mail service to send the e-mail after you're dead.

 

[Toxic Person]

So would he be important enough if you'd be together? It sounds like you should replace her if you're the only one making him feel normal...
Well thats complicated, know a bit of that feeling from both sides, just different

He will be lonely, part of him will always be...and he won't forget your suicide, maybe not even a single day. For making him understand you should talk cause leaving a note could throw up just more questions, at least try to talk to him a bit before leaving a death note as last words.
People can love each other to the maximum but that still doesn't have to be an important reason not to CTB, doesn't matter if it has something to do with each other or just with the own life itself...dying together sounds quite romantic but I couldn't take my beloved one with me, even if I have to be alone in afterlife bc of that. Thats the price and it's never easy to understand or to live with for the opposite person

Damn we have a hell of a struggle with all this existance shit

Its sounds like a good idea to talk with him before the cbt and note.
I guess i will meet him one day before i do it and spend the whole day with him.

I never could do it with him togheter.

(Okay da ich weiß, dass du deutsch kannst schreibe ich auf Deutsch weiter, weil mir gerade englisch etwas schwer faellt.)

Das Problem ist halt, dass ich weiß ich werde ihm wahrscheinlich mit meinem cbt ziemlich verletzen und ich lasse ihn mit vielen bösen Menschen alleine (Seine Freundin zb. Sie hasst mich und wenn es nach ihr gehen würde, würde er nur bei ihr oder Zuhause hängen)

Ich hab wie gesagt ueberlegt den ganzen Tag mit ihm zu verbringen, aber nicht, dass es ihn noch mehr verletzt und es nach hinten los geht :/ Ich will es ihm so sanft wie möglich machen.

Warum ist das existieren so schwierig und man nicht mal seinen cbt ohne schlechtes Gewissen durchziehen kann und ohne an andere denken usw.

 

[Toxic Person]

(I love your profile picture so much <3)

You really care about your friend, it shows how great of a human being you are :-). Maybe you could not only write a note, but also record a video especially for him to see? It's more personal I think. You could record the video, and then use an online e-mail service to send the e-mail after you're dead.

(I love ur profil picture too <3)

Thanks for this words. They makes me really happy <3
But the idea with the record r really good.
Maybe i do this too or only this.
Thanks for this idea <3 **hug** <3 <3

 

[Memento Mori]

If you're lazy continuing in English I'm gonna answer you per PM so that we won't break any rules or cast out ppl who don't understand :)