I'm literally so close to finally doing it but I cant find the courage to actually do it, I'm kinda afraid of what's on the other side but it's gotta be better than this right?
Well, whats on the other side is something that keep part of everyone here. Im 47 and pretty skeptical about "other side". I think that is a lot worse try, fail and stay here. So if you really want to do something, be sure you're not going to make any mistake, there are bunch of info here about the effective methods and none of them are easy to do, so it's all about commitment. As atheist I dont believe in "other side" except our reality thats basically our conscious mind, The whole life experience is just based on this feeling of "consciouness" and nothing more. The moment your brain stop, no conscious, it's over. We're already living in hell, so it doesnt matter.
There seems to be a familiar pattern here. The more we think about it, the more difficult it is to carry it through to the end. I'm experiencing the same problem.
Exactly. The more you think, the more you become resistent. If we could bypass this mechanism things would be easier.