Venting I'm nobody's priority.

[DepressedEgg]

One of the big reasons I'm suicidal is that I'm not, nor have I ever been, a priority. My parents always focused on themselves or my brother, and my friends don't care about me. I tried going back and checking when the last time was that a friend messaged me first and it wasn't because I'd told them to. And I couldn't find an example. I've never had a friend that would message just to check on me, and yet I do that for all my friends. I once almost got stabbed to help someone break up with their boyfriend, only for her to never speak to me again.

Everyone sees me as just a comic relief, someone who provides a service and nothing more. I don't want that for myself. I wish I could just not wake up tomorrow. But I'm too spiteful to ctb, I don't wanna give the world the satisfaction.
I checked. June 5th. That's the last time someone sent me a message without wanting something from me.

 

[Yllene13]

I completely understand, my friends also do this to me. What sucks even more is when you see them have wayyy more fun with other people and when they only go to you when said 'other people' aren't available

 

[lokabe82]

I'm sorry. It's rare for people to check in just to make sure their friends are doing okay. You deserve people who realize how special that is.

 

[cami]

hey im talking to you now, okay? you didn't ask me too but here i am. if you ever need to talk or vent please PM me, i promise i'll reply within 24 hours unless something happens to me. you can be your own priority. take time for yourself and take care of not just your body but your soul. i care.

 

[MrDarkness]

I hope you can find a group of people that help you, I hope you can start being recognized as the person you are. Life is shit but at least we are in it together

I hope you can find peace in life or death

 

[Mord.]

I feel the same. In every friendship i had i was the one who tried to please everyone so they acept me but they didn't care about me. Now it feels like i'm not important in anyone's life, I'm dispensable

 

[90starve]

im seeing that a lot of people can relate to this - it's a very big problem for me too. loneliness is a very difficult thing to overcome, and im not sure i'll ever be okay with being alone <3

 

[angel31]

I can totally relate. I have really cool friends and I love them, but I am not their priority and I am invested so much more in the relationship… But if you ever want to talk, PM me, id answer as soon as I see your message
Sending you hugs and love

 

[Asingletwig]

Same and it fucking sucks to always having to be the one to initiate everything. Like I've deleted my Instagram account with "friends" that I've known for almost a decade and one of them I've known my whole life. Two of them literally live around the corner from me and not one of them sent me a message or check up on me. Even though I've been there at some of their lowest moments and they can't even be bothered to take the 2minute walk to see whats up. So fuck em I've got no actual friends.

I completely understand, my friends also do this to me. What sucks even more is when you see them have wayyy more fun with other people and when they only go to you when said 'other people' aren't available

Dis be way too relatable.

 

[The anhedonic one]

I definitely feel you on this one.
All of my so-called relationships in the past were completely one-sided. Nobody ever contacted me unless I contacted them first.
I developed a seriously toxic habit with my phone where I would be checking every 2 minutes to see if someone had read my texts and emails etc.
It eventually made my mental illness's worse, because people rarely responded and only did so when it suited them .
I eventually cut all ties with everyone, even though it was emotionally devastating to do so.
Being completely alone in this world is emotionally difficult at times, yet so much more easier and less stressful.

 

[happyhippo69]

Hey bro, your post really spoke out my mind and you are not alone. Just recently I realised that they are way more people that go through the same thing we do. If you ever like to text or talk hmu. It's up to you I won't be upset if you won't just want to get you know a bit more <3

 

[FuneralCry]

Humans certainly are very self centred after all, and most only care about what directly affects themselves so it's true that you cannot rely on them. It's really such a cruel world we exist in where humans just create more suffering but sadly this is the reality.

 

[OAn0n]

One of the big reasons I'm suicidal is that I'm not, nor have I ever been, a priority. My parents always focused on themselves or my brother, and my friends don't care about me. I tried going back and checking when the last time was that a friend messaged me first and it wasn't because I'd told them to. And I couldn't find an example. I've never had a friend that would message just to check on me, and yet I do that for all my friends. I once almost got stabbed to help someone break up with their boyfriend, only for her to never speak to me again.

Everyone sees me as just a comic relief, someone who provides a service and nothing more. I don't want that for myself. I wish I could just not wake up tomorrow. But I'm too spiteful to ctb, I don't wanna give the world the satisfaction.
I checked. June 5th. That's the last time someone sent me a message without wanting something from me.

December 12 last time anyone sent me a message

 

[DepressedEgg]

I developed a seriously toxic habit with my phone where I would be checking every 2 minutes to see if someone had read my texts and emails etc.
It eventually made my mental illness's worse, because people rarely responded and only did so when it suited them .

This definitely hits close to home

 

[brokeandbroken]

One of the big reasons I'm suicidal is that I'm not, nor have I ever been, a priority. My parents always focused on themselves or my brother, and my friends don't care about me. I tried going back and checking when the last time was that a friend messaged me first and it wasn't because I'd told them to. And I couldn't find an example. I've never had a friend that would message just to check on me, and yet I do that for all my friends. I once almost got stabbed to help someone break up with their boyfriend, only for her to never speak to me again.

Everyone sees me as just a comic relief, someone who provides a service and nothing more. I don't want that for myself. I wish I could just not wake up tomorrow. But I'm too spiteful to ctb, I don't wanna give the world the satisfaction.
I checked. June 5th. That's the last time someone sent me a message without wanting something from me.

Me too. There isn't anyone for me. I'm literally on my own. Broke/Homeless. Society just collectively went fuck that guy. Literally couldn't tell you why. Maybe they just think it's funny to watch someone who worked hard and tried to do the right thing suffer. I have been slowly building to it. But today you know today is the day I realized I literally hate people. When you are abandoned because you were the *victim* of a crime by your parents, your "friends", family, extended family, your government, fucking everybody when you spent your life trying to help people with the flip side being utter undeserved poverty, destitution, disease whatever. Yeah fuck people. Everyone just wants to focus on themselves. SS is the only place I've gone where anyone gives a damn. How is it the only people who show me any signs of caring are people who want to be dead. What is wrong with this world.

 

[The anhedonic one]

Me too. There isn't anyone for me. I'm literally on my own. Broke/Homeless. Society just collectively went fuck that guy. Literally couldn't tell you why. Maybe they just think it's funny to watch someone who worked hard and tried to do the right thing suffer. I have been slowly building to it. But today you know today is the day I realized I literally hate people. When you are abandoned because you were the *victim* of a crime by your parents, your "friends", family, extended family, your government, fucking everybody when you spent your life trying to help people with the flip side being utter undeserved poverty, destitution, disease whatever. Yeah fuck people. Everyone just wants to focus on themselves. SS is the only place I've gone where anyone gives a damn. How is it the only people who show me any signs of caring are people who want to be dead. What is wrong with this world.

I'm completely alone in this dreadful world and living in my car.
You are not alone my friend. So sorry you are going through this.

 

[brokeandbroken]

I'm completely alone in this dreadful world and living in my car.
You are not alone my friend. So sorry you are going through this.

I'm in a homeless shelter. I wish I had a car. I wish you the best. If you need anything let me know.

 

[The anhedonic one]

I'm in a homeless shelter. I wish I had a car. I wish you the best. If you need anything let me know.

Thank you.
I'm here for you too.