![Boudika](/data/avatars/l/74/74654.jpg?1693042509)
Boudika
Trauma? Oh you mean reason why I'm hilarious
- Aug 22, 2023
- 155
My mental state continues to deteriorate. In addition to feeling like the biggest loser in the world, like I've wasted my life, I feel like I'm getting closer and closer to insanity. I'm getting crazy because of nostalgia, actually my mind is only focused on memories and on made up stories. I spend all day as if daydreaming, and the feeling of nostalgia and longing is killing me. It literally feels like I would give up everything to return to my childhood, to be happy again at least for a moment more. I can't express my emotions, even though I'm filled with them, I feel a burning desire to do anything just to stop suffering. The only thing I want is ctb. And I don't know what to do. A psychiatrist is out of question, because I don't have the money, and my parents won't take it seriously. I keep waiting for the opportunity to do it, but I'm too much of a coward to finally kill myself. Tell me what to do, how to make it all go away. Please.