I'd say there's more than one. There's more than eight billion people alive. That's a number that can't even be understood, not at all visualized in any way. You'd be unlucky to have less than a few hundred thousand at the least.
But it really feels like there's almost nobody around. Why's it feel as though I have to be the wild extrovert, that I have to maintain keeping contact, that I have to initiate always- always? That's the real issue for me. When's it gonna be that someone else picks up the slack?
Well said. I feel almost exactly the same. Almost, because as Tyutchev said;
"How can a heart expression find?
How should another know your mind?"
But I feel similarly.
Gotta be honest first. I had a rough couple of days, been enduring the most conniving treatment at work, working myself to exhaustion, so obviously, and getting ridiculed all the same. This is not at all an apology for not answering promptly to your thoughts. It's a tantrum. I'm not able to put myself in a state of mind to answer this coherently and with a bit of flare.
Fortunately for this argument, coincidentally, my incoherence and distress is linked to me not knowing what is going on in other people's heads. I'm genuinely perplexed. This is so old news it shouldn't surprise me, but it always does. People change their mind and attitude quick! How abruptly they show their true face, how shocking it is every time. Just when you thought you have tapped into some sort of sincerity, you are shown you didn't. And it's either that people have indeed multiple masks they casually wear when it is appropriate, or they are so weak they can't hold themselves accountable for anything so their mask is just cowardice. Either way, makes me wanna quit people. I wish I could.
Tbh, it's me. It must be. I am too harsh and direct. But at least I'm honest. I have no mask except my half-faked smile intended to make people laugh alongside me... I so want everyone to like me. Guess it's because nobody does lol
1 or even more in a 8 billion chance is pretty clearly a good odd. But Tyutchev is right. It's one of those eternal questions that will never have less than 2 true and directly opposite answers.
It is impossible to know anyone simply because we don't and can't express everything that's in us. From visceral, untranslatable impressions to experiences so infinitely complicated that everyone closes themselves off because nobody wants another life to bear besides their own.
But that's why we are same. We are people. Objectively we absolutely must have an innate capacity to understand that we are a variation of the same thing. Can't deny that: our "throwness" in this world that's too complicated for us in every direction, forced to constantly improvise with no idea of the end result, cursed (and blessed bla bla) with memory that makes sure that we never forget the mistakes that hurt us.
People are closing themselves off from being good, open, sincere because they shield themselves from being hurt. Because they get hurt. Fact is, we are lowering our odds. Blame what you must for it - dangerous times, evil people, evolutionary programming, misanthropy. Even if you hate, on some level, you do understand.
Maybe it's not the chances at all and it's not about a decision you can make... Maybe it just hard to have broken pieces fit together. It doesn't neutralize the odds completely, but it pushes them to the edge.
