Venting Im evil for being lazy?

[TheSomebody]

My whole life is all about pain. I have always been humiliated and abused at school, college, everywhere. At home I didn't have much peace either, because my parents were always fighting and things got uglier between them with each passing year.

Even so they decided to breed again , in the hope that this newborn would bring the family closer together. It didn't help, the difference is that now I have a younger sister suffering with me in a dysfunctional family.
in fact, things have gotten worse, because my sister is as disabled as I am and creates a lot more stress for my family.
My father constantly says that life sucks, that raising a child is a torment and that he will not accept another failed child like me. He says he can't take this family anymore, that he feels disgust for the family he created.

I suffer from severe depression. I already tried psychologists, nothing helps. I have no strength for anything, not even to things i enjoy.
I can't work or study anymore. I spend the whole day in a dark room sleeping, listening to music and gaming. I already gave up living and plan to kill myself in November.

Lately, my whole family is making my days far more painful. They are constantly roasting me without mercy . They say that what I am doing with my parents is something horrible, because I am already an adult and I should support myself. They say I have no right to complain about anything because I don't work, I don't pay bills and I don't do anything but stay in a room

My mom recently fought badly with my dad and they don't speak for a while. Yesterday my aunt said I'm an asshole for not supporting my mom, because she is going through a painful moment. She said I should be the man of the house and work to give my mom some support.

Every time she said that to me, I felt angry, like I was being wronged in some way.

I know, im lazy and jobless, its my fault too... but f#ck ... i didnt ask to be born in this hell...I didn't ask to have to deal with all the work that life demands from us

I wonder what they will say when I ctb: "That shit had everything in life and still killed himself!" or "How can he do this to his parents?

 

[SmellyRat]

It's your bastard parents fault for bringing you into this hellish world.

Hope you're ok

 

[Disappointered]

You don't have to feel guilty about not working or not getting along with your shitty parents. Or about catching the bus. This all a crazy and mostly terrible dream. We need to leave it.

 

[KClown]

When a human being gets control of his life, he is completely free to change it in the way he thinks is right for him.
Deviating from social stigmas is hard but manageble. Voluntarily cutting ties with society is just as good as an option as any others. I dont believe there is need for remorse in such decision.
People tend to humiliate those of opposite opinions. Its sociology. Dont feel bad for having different life goals/life style. Feel bad for them being as barbaric as they are.

 

[ZardozOmega]

I'm lazy and jobless too. Spend all the time in my room. The shame and guilt are insurmountable. Thankfully, if I keep myself ocuppied I don't feel shame.

 

[demuic]

People force children into the world...then get mad when they grow up and tell them they don't want to be there anymore. When they never made the choice to be there in the first place. Life was forced on them.

People think, because parents give you the "gift" of life, now you owe everything to them. When in reality, parents must provide you with support or else it's abuse, and while you shouldn't abuse them in turn, there's no reason why "a gift you didn't want" should have to be repaid.

 

[Deleted member 17949]

I think a lot of normal people do see laziness as evil to an extent, thinking that all people should have a drive to work and those that don't are leeches. I probably am evil kek but gonna die anyway

 

[Good4Nothing]

"You were put on this earth to fart around. Don't let anyone tell you any different."
- Kurt Vonnegut, Jr.

 

[ZardozOmega]

I think a lot of normal people do see laziness as evil to an extent, thinking that all people should have a drive to work and those that don't are leeches. I probably am evil kek but gonna die anyway

why do you think you're evil?

 

[TheSomebody]

People force children into the world...then get mad when they grow up and tell them they don't want to be there anymore. When they never made the choice to be there in the first place. Life was forced on them.

People think, because parents give you the "gift" of life, now you owe everything to them. When in reality, parents must provide you with support or else it's abuse, and while you shouldn't abuse them in turn, there's no reason why "a gift you didn't want" should have to be repaid.

If I had a child, I would not force them to work, because I know that they did not ask to be here and I imposed this life on them. Yeah, I wouldn't be able to deal with a lazy person ... so I would never have children just in case. This is a thought that I have had since I was a kid.

I think that the act of imposing on its own is already quite immoral and once you impose something on someone you lose the right to complain about the results. If life is hardship, basically by having children you are enslaving that person, becaue now they will be forced to work.

But the worst thing is that people don't let you go. If I tell my family that I am going to kill myself they will roast me even more and still arrest me in a madhouse later.

 

[rabbithole]

Hey, you're absolutely not evil for being "lazy". You're depressed, hence the lack of motivation. Please do not demonize yourself for being depressed.

 

[LittleJem]

Depression is a neurological issue - they just can't see it cos it's invisible. And lots of people believe rubbish about it. No-one would choose to be like this - it's a disability. So anyone saying it's laziness is just another person blaming people with disabilities.