Method I'm considering jumping off a rooftop I can not take it anymore

[Iwtbm1]

it's my first thread here
I've always considered ending my life because I have so much mental problems and zero self esteem that is worsen and I had few maniac episodes due to bipolar.
i live very far away from family or friends and it make it worse but it will be the same if i went back plus learning disabilities. even though i managed to have master degree because i stayed my whole life studying to avoid interaction , im fucked up in the head

im now considering jumping off a rooftop but when i have fear that i will chicken out and not do it, and that will make me in trouble ..
i am looking for suggestions about legal substances (maybe psycadelics or types of pot
or to take so i can be calm and not fear the jump ..
250' is enough to end it all
please help me
I want answers ...
can you help me with info about this method or posts here talking about it , because i cant use search option now

 

[doctordetritus]

Hello Iwtbm1. i am sorry that things are so inane and sucky. life gets two big thumbs down from me.

i would not recommended taking psychedelics for that. at all. the last time i crammed mushrooms into my face, i was trapped in a very convincing and truly intense hell realm. it was not great.

i dont really know anything about being bipolar, so im sorry i cannot really comment on that, but im reminded of one of my favorite comedians stephen fry. heres a thoughtful video of him speaking about having bipolar as well as suicide:

 

[Iwtbm1]

Thank you for replying
I never tried psychedelics and that's why I'm so afraid to do them..
What do you suggest for me to take to make me less afraid.
I'm diagnosed but never got treatment for a long.

 

[another_creature]

it's my first thread here
I've always considered ending my life because I have so much mental problems and zero self esteem that is worsen and I had few maniac episodes due to bipolar.
i live very far away from family or friends and it make it worse but it will be the same if i went back plus learning disabilities. even though i managed to have master degree because i stayed my whole life studying to avoid interaction , im fucked up in the head

im now considering jumping off a rooftop but when i have fear that i will chicken out and not do it, and that will make me in trouble ..
i am looking for suggestions about legal substances (maybe psycadelics or types of pot
or to take so i can be calm and not fear the jump ..
250' is enough to end it all
please help me
I want answers ...
can you help me with info about this method or posts here talking about it , because i cant use search option now

You sound a lot like me. If you want we could talk

 

[annointed_towers]

There's nothing you can take that will make you not afraid. Your fear and survival instinct are deeply ingrained.

 

[Iwtbm1]

You sound a lot like me. If you want we could talk

It's comforting to know this..
I'm new member so I'm not able to send message. Could you?

 

[movingvibes247]

Based on what you've said about yourself, psychedelics may be a hit or miss for you. The most important thing with psychedelics is set and setting. Right mindset, and right location.

Experimenting with them a few times before CTBing may give you insights to how you'll respond when actually CTBing with them, but even this is not 100% reliable because you can have a string of good psychedelic experiences, and one bad trip just hits you in the face. Also different psychedelics will produce different experiences so keep that in mind.

 

[Iwtbm1]

You sound a lot like me. If you want we could talk

It's comforting to know this..
I'm new member so I'm not able to send message

There's nothing you can take that will make you not afraid. Your fear and survival instinct are deeply ingrained.

There's nothing you can take that will make you not afraid. Your fear and survival instinct are deeply ingrained.

I'm afraid I can't do it and end up in jail or mental institute because I have no one here

 

[another_creature]

It's comforting to know this..
I'm new member so I'm not able to send message. Could you?

Oh no, I think I can't yet :( that's upsetting

 

[Iwtbm1]

Oh no, I think I can't yet :( that's upsetting

I know
I can chat on telegram if you like

 

[another_creature]

I know
I can chat on telegram if you like

Sure, what's your @?