Help I'm back/need help

[PrettyKitty]

I know I know, I was trying to recover and I still am but, I have this very big dream of wanting to bleed out or just bleed alot (aka slitting my wrisits)
I really really wanna do this and I know i shouldnt because I'm not in sound mine (ive been drinkin) but even when im sober i want too. I'm scared of to much pain but I really wanna just bleed alot and I deserve this pain for being worthless. Does anybody know where I can find derections on how to cut the artery or something (this is not to die but if i dide accidently than I wouldnt be upset)
thanks dudess

 

[WorthlessTrash]

if you're trying to recover, cutting yourself is probably a bad thing to do. If I remember correctly, you seemed to have body positivity issues so mutilating yourself is probably going to make things a lot worse.

You're trying to recover so you don't need directions to cut yourself. You need therapy. Also a person who's trying to recover does not insinuate that they'd be okay with accidentally dying......

 

[PrettyKitty]

if you're trying to recover, cutting yourself is probably a bad thing to do. If I remember correctly, you seemed to have body positivity issues so mutilating yourself is probably going to make things a lot worse.

You're trying to recover so you don't need directions to cut yourself. You need therapy. Also a person who's trying to recover does not insinuate that they'd be okay with accidentally dying......

i dont know what to do its just stuck in my head and the only way to get it out is doing it

 

[WorthlessTrash]

i dont know what to do its just stuck in my head and the only way to get it out is doing it

Therapy, then. Since you're trying to recover.

 

[thatlatealready]

If you can call a therapist or access a crisis line, this would probably be the time to do so. You can always go to A&E or something if you're truly unable to stop yourself. These resources exist to try to prevent impulsive suicides and acts of self harm. Admittedly, they're not always the most helpful, but they're there for a reason.

The periods where you aren't certain you want to act but feel compelled to do so are the best times to take advantage of these kind of options. They can help stop the thoughts or delay you until the urge passes.

 

[LittleJem]

It might be silly, but watching video interviews with serial killers can distract me a little. I don't know if it will help you, but for me because it's a bit gruesome it can distract me from suicidal thoughts.

This is a painful dangerous option and no way you deserve it.

 

[EmmaD]

It might be silly, but watching video interviews with serial killers can distract me a little. I don't know if it will help you, but for me because it's a bit gruesome it can distract me from suicidal thoughts.

This is a painful dangerous option and no way you deserve it.

I think I relate to this too! I used to look up gore sites and stuff. Maybe when I was feeling self destructive, watching disturbing stuff was like mental harm rather than doing something physical?

 

[charlotte_]

I don't think you should try any of that if you're trying to recover, since it can easily influence you to relapse. If you cut yourself, then you've accepted that you're worthless and only deserve punishment. That's not what you're aiming for right? Maybe try to engage in healthier activities or hobbies and learn to appreciate yourself, rather than doing that

 

[SVEN]

You've come through so very much already, Pretty Kitty, surely the very fact that you've posted here about this tells you that somewhere deep inside you already know that this is not the time or the way.
You're here where you know you are safe amongst others who travel this same dark, gloomy path. We're not going to judge, criticise or try to tell you what to do or not do. We're just friends you've never met who hope for the best possible outcome (whatever that may be) for you.
Be gentle with yourself, Sweet Pretty Kitty.

 

[macrocosm]

I know I know, I was trying to recover and I still am but, I have this very big dream of wanting to bleed out or just bleed alot (aka slitting my wrisits)
I really really wanna do this and I know i shouldnt because I'm not in sound mine (ive been drinkin) but even when im sober i want too. I'm scared of to much pain but I really wanna just bleed alot and I deserve this pain for being worthless. Does anybody know where I can find derections on how to cut the artery or something (this is not to die but if i dide accidently than I wouldnt be upset)
thanks dudess

Well, for one you aren't worthless and you don't deserve pain for any reason.

If you're trying to recover probably wait till you sober up and explore your options

 

[glitterypearls]

I been seeing a lot of your posts trying to CTB, I'm sorry you have BPD too. I know this disorder make everything so hard for us but I don't think you should CTB unless you are 100% sure. I know this will sound harsh but I don't think you are 100% sure even from your other posts. also slitting your wrist rarely succeed. I say all of that with love. this isn't something you can rush or impulsively do unless you want to end up regretting it in a ward.