リンさん
Rina • she/her, lesbian
- Sep 9, 2023
- 323
I don't have a job. I abandoned my studies because I feel absolutely terrified of how much catching up I need to do bc I fell off due to personal problems which led to me being incapacitated for weeks.
I look normal on the surface but on the inside I am hurting so much every single day. I don't want this. I'm so tired. Everything hurts. I maybe get two or three good hours out of the day, and all I can do is to enjoy what little normalcy I have doing things I love instead of doing things I need to do.
Im so scared to get back into studying because I missed so much. I feel like I will never catch up and will always be judged. I know my parents hate me because I am so lazy and unmotivated.
They always ask me about it and all I can do is lie. I try my best not to speak to them because they will always ask me about studying and nothing more.
Im such a disappointment. All I want is for someone to tell me I got this, that my life won't be ruined and that I can still fix things. Because it really feels like this is it for me.
I want to die so badly just so I don't have to feel shame anymore and let my parents live their lives instead of taking care of a mentally disabled person. I know that. I have nobody to comfort me or rely on. The only person I loved has left me and lied to me.
I don't want to live anymore. I am so tired and worthless
I look normal on the surface but on the inside I am hurting so much every single day. I don't want this. I'm so tired. Everything hurts. I maybe get two or three good hours out of the day, and all I can do is to enjoy what little normalcy I have doing things I love instead of doing things I need to do.
Im so scared to get back into studying because I missed so much. I feel like I will never catch up and will always be judged. I know my parents hate me because I am so lazy and unmotivated.
They always ask me about it and all I can do is lie. I try my best not to speak to them because they will always ask me about studying and nothing more.
Im such a disappointment. All I want is for someone to tell me I got this, that my life won't be ruined and that I can still fix things. Because it really feels like this is it for me.
I want to die so badly just so I don't have to feel shame anymore and let my parents live their lives instead of taking care of a mentally disabled person. I know that. I have nobody to comfort me or rely on. The only person I loved has left me and lied to me.
I don't want to live anymore. I am so tired and worthless