Venting I'm a bad person and i definitely deserve everything that's happening to me

[Nights]

Few years ago, i had a lot of friends, i was so famous among people, i was the first thing that comes across the mind of people when they think about the word "based" i did raided a lot of discord servers especially lgbt and gacha servers, i hacked many people, i doxxed a lot of people that was considered "cringe" just for fun, i sim-swapped and taken over people accounts, i did a lot of funny trolling, i swatted people, i taken over sites, i ruined a lot of pedophiles lives (not something that i regret for, but i could've fixed problems without resorting to causing unnecessary pain), i sneaked into my school's at night and peed there and stole important documents that caused my teacher to be kicked off the school, everyone used to brag about even getting a reply from me due to how famous i was in my community, i liked being known as the based legendary kiddo, it made heaven to me, but i regret being extremist and causing a lot of suffering to other pain just for fame, i even almost got away with what i have done without facing any consequence, but karma still got me anyways, i changed a lot since that time tho, i fixed myself and become more empathetic and helpful towards others, and i become a loner and left islam, but i can't undo shit that i did sadly

 

[jaxxon_sunn]

Few years ago, i had a lot of friends, i was so famous among people, i was the first thing that comes across the mind of people when they think about the word "based" i did raided a lot of discord servers especially lgbt and gacha servers, i hacked many people, i doxxed a lot of people that was considered "cringe" just for fun, i sim-swapped and taken over people accounts, i did a lot of funny trolling, i swatted people, i taken over sites, i ruined a lot of pedophiles lives (not something that i regret for, but i could've fixed problems without resorting to causing unnecessary pain), i sneaked into my school's at night and peed there and stole important documents that caused my teacher to be kicked off the school, everyone used to brag about even getting a reply from me due to how famous i was in my community, i liked being known as the based legendary kiddo, it made heaven to me, but i regret being extremist and causing a lot of suffering to other pain just for fame, i even almost got away with what i have done without facing any consequence, but karma still got me anyways, i changed a lot since that time tho, i fixed myself and become more empathetic and helpful towards others, and i become a loner and left islam, but i can't undo shit that i did sadly

Im glad that you've learned since then and became more empathetic. I hope you keep doing kindness now rather than hurtful things.

 

[Goodgirlryeo101]

Few years ago, i had a lot of friends, i was so famous among people, i was the first thing that comes across the mind of people when they think about the word "based" i did raided a lot of discord servers especially lgbt and gacha servers, i hacked many people, i doxxed a lot of people that was considered "cringe" just for fun, i sim-swapped and taken over people accounts, i did a lot of funny trolling, i swatted people, i taken over sites, i ruined a lot of pedophiles lives (not something that i regret for, but i could've fixed problems without resorting to causing unnecessary pain), i sneaked into my school's at night and peed there and stole important documents that caused my teacher to be kicked off the school, everyone used to brag about even getting a reply from me due to how famous i was in my community, i liked being known as the based legendary kiddo, it made heaven to me, but i regret being extremist and causing a lot of suffering to other pain just for fame, i even almost got away with what i have done without facing any consequence, but karma still got me anyways, i changed a lot since that time tho, i fixed myself and become more empathetic and helpful towards others, and i become a loner and left islam, but i can't undo shit that i did sadly

Not to sound judgmental but why would you hack and Doxx anyone?? Do you know how traumatising is it to be the one being hacked??? Was being famous that important to you??

 

[endofafoxtwo]

Being extremist for fame or money is not remotely based. That shit is cringe as fuck, essentially grifting. It's only based if done soley for the spirit of the act.

 

[Nights]

Not to sound judgmental but why would you hack and Doxx anyone?? Do you know how traumatising is it to be the one being hacked??? Was being famous that important to you??

I did consider stealing people accounts "funny" and i also did consider doxxing as a "troll" and when i was younger, i was a narcissist so i found "fame" so important and i deeply regret that, sadly i can't undo the shit that i did :/

Being extremist for fame or money is not remotely based. That shit is cringe as fuck, essentially grifting. It's only based if done soley for the spirit of the act.

The reason for why i was extremist was being indoctrinated by cringe parents and society, and i didn't wanted money at all in fact i made 0 money irl from all the shit that i did but i did leaked people's credit cards and their paypal accounts credentials, but i caused people to lose money, i caused loses that are likely worth 20k dollars on discord nitro to many, for example once time i hacked a kid and i wasted all of his parents money over discord nitro, like 900 dollars or so i don't know how he dealt with his parents but i'm deeply regretful for causing that unneccesary pain to others as according to his login credentials he was doing bussiness and that was probably the way he makes money to feed himself, i wish i was more mature when i was young but i don't have the ability to undo things that i did :/

 

[Aisley]

I've ruined lives. Not online, but face to face. My younger years were a real slash amd burn kind of race. Some of those lives were pedos, but one was a mother of three. I've never made ammends, and I hardly even think of her. I've trained my brain over the years to only think what I let it. And if this is advice, it's terrible. So it's not. Just letting you know you're not the only one. Maybe, if you have the cash and this really keeps you up at night, you could find these people all over again and send them money. Not the pedos, fuck them.
Congrats on leaving Islam, btw.

 

[Goodgirlryeo101]

I did consider stealing people accounts "funny" and i also did consider doxxing as a "troll" and when i was younger, i was a narcissist so i found "fame" so important and i deeply regret that, sadly i can't undo the shit that i did :/

You think doing that to people is funny ?? Do you know the psychological damage that you cause someone on the receiving end of that. Even if someone is a pedophile it wasn't your place to do that and that's why there is "laws". You think the psychological damage that you would have caused would have resolved this?!

Now let me tell you something because I have been on the receiving end of this… it is the most traumatic thing that anyone could ever go through and no amount of medication or therapy can ever fix this. Period.

If I was on the receiving end of this I would never accept that apology because there are certain things and problems that once done they can never be fixed or sorted out. I'm talking from my own experience here, I have gone through this hell on and off since 2018 and truly a person can take so much and because of this that's why I want to take my own life because I hate anything associated with living. I only get solace from music, crime documentaries and forums, I hate living and it's because of people like you.

Because of this I have lost everything in my life and like one time wasn't enough and now back for more, like okay you will only stop me being the "punching bag" once I'm dead. I will never want to live because of people like you who take fun and please upon someone's expense and misery.

 

[Forever Sleep]

I did consider stealing people accounts "funny" and i also did consider doxxing as a "troll" and when i was younger, i was a narcissist so i found "fame" so important and i deeply regret that, sadly i can't undo the shit that i did :/

The reason for why i was extremist was being indoctrinated by cringe parents and society, and i didn't wanted money at all in fact i made 0 money irl from all the shit that i did but i did leaked people's credit cards and their paypal accounts credentials, but i caused people to lose money, i caused loses that are likely worth 20k dollars on discord nitro to many, for example once time i hacked a kid and i wasted all of his parents money over discord nitro, like 900 dollars or so i don't know how he dealt with his parents but i'm deeply regretful for causing that unneccesary pain to others as according to his login credentials he was doing bussiness and that was probably the way he makes money to feed himself, i wish i was more mature when i was young but i don't have the ability to undo things that i did :/

I'm really curious about this... Sorry to treat you like a lab rat! You say you WERE a narcissist. Are you not now? Does realisation change you? (I guess it must do...) Can I ask- what made you change? Are you grateful that it happened? It's got to be kind of bittersweet in a way.

I guess I'm curious because I feel like I've been around a narcisist before. I've cut all ties and hope to God I'll never see them again. I suppose- I just won't accept that they will ever change. If people think they have- I'm just convinced it's an act and the same old them is there underneath- waiting to be triggered and emerge.

I'm curious to hear how much you have changed and how you now feel regret now etc. That's also something I never thought possible for a narcissist- so- congratulations! But also- commiserations- it's got to be unpleasant looking back on all that and feeling guilty.

 

[Foresty]

Man, you didn't deserved anything bad that happened to you
Also It's me, Password is "Paperclips Vodka", remember?

 

[Nights]

You think doing that to people is funny ?? Do you know the psychological damage that you cause someone on the receiving end of that. Even if someone is a pedophile it wasn't your place to do that and that's why there is "laws". You think the psychological damage that you would have caused would have resolved this?!

Now let me tell you something because I have been on the receiving end of this… it is the most traumatic thing that anyone could ever go through and no amount of medication or therapy can ever fix this. Period.

If I was on the receiving end of this I would never accept that apology because there are certain things and problems that once done they can never be fixed or sorted out. I'm talking from my own experience here, I have gone through this hell on and off since 2018 and truly a person can take so much and because of this that's why I want to take my own life because I hate anything associated with living. I only get solace from music, crime documentaries and forums, I hate living and it's because of people like you.

Because of this I have lost everything in my life and like one time wasn't enough and now back for more, like okay you will only stop me being the "punching bag" once I'm dead. I will never want to live because of people like you who take fun and please upon someone's expense and misery.

As a kid i used to think that was funny because it gave me the feeling that i was superior to others and this bullshit, now i regret everything, i'm unable to undo all things that i did in the past, and yes i definitely deserve being tormented i understand that, and i can't blame you for hating on me since i've been a cruel person, i don't even deserve to end my life to stop my suffering, i understand that me and people like me are those little cocky cunts in this world that bring nothing expect troubles and suffering

I'm really curious about this... Sorry to treat you like a lab rat! You say you WERE a narcissist. Are you not now? Does realisation change you? (I guess it must do...) Can I ask- what made you change? Are you grateful that it happened? It's got to be kind of bittersweet in a way.

I guess I'm curious because I feel like I've been around a narcisist before. I've cut all ties and hope to God I'll never see them again. I suppose- I just won't accept that they will ever change. If people think they have- I'm just convinced it's an act and the same old them is there underneath- waiting to be triggered and emerge.

I'm curious to hear how much you have changed and how you now feel regret now etc. That's also something I never thought possible for a narcissist- so- congratulations! But also- commiserations- it's got to be unpleasant looking back on all that and feeling guilty.

No, realisation alone doesn't change narcissists (at least narcissists like me) in order to change i have to lose everything and lose all of my friends and suffer, and then be a lonely person for few years, and then meet few friends, and learn from the past's mistakes, if i didn't suffer i would have been a bad person now, i did change a lot, when i was younger, i was extremist, biased, very narcissistic, don't consider others opinions and directly throw people's opinion in the garbage without even trying to understand their point, somewhat near to muslim internet mafia (that was due to indoctrination and not my bad personality) unable to understand what is empathy (i wasn't a sadist but i couldn't understand empathy too much, i had very low empathy) now i become the complete oposite of what i was, i left islam and extremism, i'm no longer narcissit ( i'm a lot more empathetic than i was, i still want to have friends and people that care about me but it's not in the same way that i used to, i no longer consider people as my slaves that should only care about me and dedicate their whole life to care about me, but at same time i become a loner, i don't mind being alone as i no longer have problems with loneliness, i even enjoy the times when i'm lonely it gives me the chance to self-care about myself) i can cry due to empathy now, that's something i could never have done when i was a narcissist, i care about people and i care about their opinion i'm even always open to change and i consider people's opinion because i always think what if i'm wrong, i also try to think from the perspective of other people always in other to predict how things could do in x scenario, suffering and experiencing how it is like to be treated like a garbage and abused with 0 friends and failing doing anything that i want has indeed helped me becoming a better person

Man, you didn't deserved anything bad that happened to you
Also It's me, Password is "Paperclips Vodka", remember?

Hi, i can't pm you cause you limit people who can view your profile

 

[Foresty]

As a kid i used to think that was funny because it gave me the feeling that i was superior to others and this bullshit, now i regret everything, i'm unable to undo all things that i did in the past, and yes i definitely deserve being tormented i understand that, and i can't blame you for hating on me since i've been a cruel person, i don't even deserve to end my life to stop my suffering, i understand that me and people like me are those little cocky cunts in this world that bring nothing expect troubles and suffering

No, realisation alone doesn't change narcissists (at least narcissists like me) in order to change i have to lose everything and lose all of my friends and suffer, and then be a lonely person for few years, and then meet few friends, and learn from the past's mistakes, if i didn't suffer i would have been a bad person now, i did change a lot, when i was younger, i was extremist, biased, very narcissistic, don't consider others opinions and directly throw people's opinion in the garbage without even trying to understand their point, somewhat near to muslim internet mafia (that was due to indoctrination and not my bad personality) unable to understand what is empathy (i wasn't a sadist but i couldn't understand empathy too much, i had very low empathy) now i become the complete oposite of what i was, i left islam and extremism, i'm no longer narcissit ( i'm a lot more empathetic than i was, i still want to have friends and people that care about me but it's not in the same way that i used to, i no longer consider people as my slaves that should only care about me and dedicate their whole life to care about me, but at same time i become a loner, i don't mind being alone as i no longer have problems with loneliness, i even enjoy the times when i'm lonely it gives me the chance to self-care about myself) i can cry due to empathy now, that's something i could never have done when i was a narcissist, i care about people and i care about their opinion i'm even always open to change and i consider people's opinion because i always think what if i'm wrong, i also try to think from the perspective of other people always in other to predict how things could do in x scenario, suffering and experiencing how it is like to be treated like a garbage and abused with 0 friends and failing doing anything that i want has indeed helped me becoming a better person

Hi, i can't pm you cause you limit people who can view your profile

How Me turn it off tho, and me cant see others profiles Either bruh
Nvm, should work now, try

 

[Nights]

How Me turn it off tho, and me cant see others profiles Either bruh

You need to make few posts and be here for a certain time to unlock searchbar and the ability to message people tho, we can talk on protonmail tho

 

[Foresty]

You need to make few posts and be here for a certain time to unlock searchbar and the ability to message people tho, we can talk on protonmail tho

Try to dm me, cause me turned off that private profile shit

 

[Praestat_Mori]

That sounds a bit like "karma". I don't believe in karma. No one ever deserves a bad life.

 

[Nights]

Try to dm me, cause me turned off that private profile shit

I'm still unable to dm you tho, but i can view your profile

 

[Goodgirlryeo101]

As a kid i used to think that was funny because it gave me the feeling that i was superior to others and this bullshit, now i regret everything, i'm unable to undo all things that i did in the past, and yes i definitely deserve being tormented i understand that, and i can't blame you for hating on me since i've been a cruel person, i don't even deserve to end my life to stop my suffering, i understand that me and people like me are those little cocky cunts in this world that bring nothing expect troubles and suffering

I don't know about "deserving" of being tormented but I was talking to you adult to adult here. It's funny to me how people think that they are perfect so they think they have the right to torment someone because they are "deserving".

I always ask the same thing like in my situation the two guys who are doing this started spreading rumours at a local council (one of them being my partner) and the other one being a (former friend).

The former friend started looking for my "friends" on Facebook to talk bad about me and my then partner had gone to that former friend on Facebook to talk bad about me his own partner.

The thing is I retaliated:

•On my former partner - I called his work as well since he has called mine ( I'm the one who even did his CV and Applied this job for him whilst he was smoking weed outside)
• The former friend I called immigration on him because he was trying to mess with my career ( having spread rumours about me at the council and to my other) "friends".

So okay they think it is okay for them to do that to me but when I retaliate I'm the bad one.

What's funny to me is that the former male friend spoke so badly of my former partner and told me no to ever get back with him. ( If it wasn't for him I would have never know or find out the things he had been saying behind my back) Mind you my former partner had my picture on his phone as a wallpaper whilst doing this nonsense behind my back ( whilst telling me I was the best thing that had ever happened to him and calling me his guardian angel). And yet saying he didn't want me behind my back and if you didn't want why did you always ask me to spend time with you and come to pick me up every week with that bmw of yours.

My former partner was bragging to me in 2019 on how he was lying on my name because he found out that his mate had told me how he lied on his name as well once his mate kicked him out. My former partner LIED about rape accusations and till this day he is still lying and that's why the farmer male friend is still going on about it.

My former partner said some racist things about his "mate" to me calling him a "sub Saharan baboon" and an "ugly c?nt". Are they both good people??!! The answer is absolute NO… they are just better liars and better manipulators.

What's funny to me I remember my former partner saying he can't stand "blacks and Asians" because he truly felt that he was superior to them. But then again the former male friend also said to me "don't trust varungu, they are snitches" but now he runs to "varungu" to bad mouth me and those "varungu" that he said he didn't trust hahah I can just laugh at the irony of everything now (the level of hypocrisy here is mind blowing).

As for myself do I regret doing those things that I mentioned I did??? absolutely NOT (maybe they wish I did) but I don't my only regret was actually getting involved with those two biggest hypocrites and when it comes to my former partner a simple google search would have helped me to avoid a lot of issues and headaches in my life.

The former friend always blames my former partner for "ruining our friendship". Hahah but then they are mates and blaming me for causing and starting this…. is that really the truth? Your heart knows the truth.

Maybe it's you that put so much importance in "friends " and "friendships", I have zero interest in that now and those two think they are friends but talked bad about each other behind each other's back hahaha.. All the best and good luck to the "friendships" that you always speak of.

This is why I wil never want to be around "humans" because they have their own agendas when it comes to what they do and yeah I can't wait to leave this foolery behind.

Anyone that can make a lie about "rape" is truly sick to the highest level and a devil just because they have to hide their "sexuality" and discredit the person … ahahah Law you know I never accused your "mate" of rape, your heart know the truth.

That sounds a bit like "karma". I don't believe in karma. No one ever deserves a bad life.

I don't believe in karma, that's just some man made mantra….

 

[Nights]

I don't know about "deserving" of being tormented but I was talking to you adult to adult here. It's funny to me how people think that they are perfect so they think they have the right to torment someone because they are "deserving".

I always ask the same thing like in my situation the two guys who are doing this started spreading rumours at a local council (one of them being my partner) and the other one being a (former friend).

The former friend started looking for my "friends" on Facebook to talk bad about me and my then partner had gone to that former friend on Facebook to talk bad about me his own partner.

The thing is I retaliated:

•On my former partner - I called his work as well since he has called mine ( I'm the one who even did his CV and Applied this job for him whilst he was smoking weed outside)
• The former friend I called immigration on him because he was trying to mess with my career ( having spread rumours about me at the council and to my other) "friends".

So okay they think it is okay for them to do that to me but when I retaliate I'm the bad one.

What's funny to me is that the former male friend spoke so badly of my former partner and told me no to ever get back with him. ( If it wasn't for him I would have never know or find out the things he had been saying behind my back) Mind you my former partner had my picture on his phone as a wallpaper whilst doing this nonsense behind my back ( whilst telling me I was the best thing that had ever happens to him and calling me his guardian angel).

My former partner was bragging to me in 201@ on how he was lying on my name because he found out that his mate had told me how he lied on his name as well once his mate kicked him out. My former partner LIED about rape accusations and till this day he is still lying and that's why the farmer male friend is still going on about it.

My former partner said some racist things about his "mate" to me calling him a "sub Saharan baboon" to me and an "ugly c?nt". Are they both good people??!! The answer is absolute NO… they are just better liars and better manipulators.

What's funny to me I remember my former partner saying he can't stand "blacks and Asians" because he truly felt that he was superior to them. But then again the former male friend also said to me "don't trust varungu, they are snitches" but now he runs to "varungu" to bad mouth me and those "varungu" that he said he didn't trust hahah I can just laugh at the irony of everything now (the level of hypocrisy here is mind blowing).

As for myself do I regret doing those things that I mentioned I did absolutely NOT (maybe they wish I did) my only regret was actually getting involved with those two biggest hypocrites and when it comes to my former partner a simple google search would have helped me to avoid a lot of issues in my life.

The former friend always blames my former partner for "ruining our friendship". Hahah but then they are mates and blaming me for causing and starting this…. is that really the truth? Your heart knows the truth.

Maybe it's you that put so much importance in "friend " and "friendship", I have zero interest in that now and those two think they are friends but talked bad about each other behind each other's back hahaha.. All the best and good luck to the "friendships" that you always speak of.

I don't believe in karma, that's just some man made mantra….

That's understandable, but i wasn't like hypocrite i was rather extremist cultish due to indoctrination i just was trying to be what people around me consideres as "gigachad" since all society and parents and everyone around me in my country was like anti-lgbt anti-gacha anti-sex anti-non muslims anti-critical thinking anti-dating, i was not the type that lies on people's back but i was worse than that since all i wanted was to cause harm and ruin things cause "it was funny and the right to thing because allah does not love such things and it is funny to me" and in my case i was barely smart to even manipulate i just considered everyone around me as fans and supporters and that's what their life should be about and i considered non-muslim people especially atheists and lgbt people and people who does dating literally just slaves to me

 

[Foresty]

I'm still unable to dm you tho, but i can view your profile

Let's talk then in Proton, for now, ig?

 

[Goodgirlryeo101]

That's understandable, but i wasn't like hypocrite i was rather extremist cultish due to indoctrination i just was trying to be what people around me consideres as "gigachad" since all society and parents and everyone around me in my country was like anti-lgbt anti-gacha anti-sex anti-non muslims anti-critical thinking anti-dating, i was not the type that lies on people's back but i was worse than that since all i wanted was to cause harm and ruin things cause "it was funny and the right to thing because allah does not love such things and it is funny to me" and in my case i was barely smart to even manipulate i just considered everyone around me as fans and supporters and that's what their life should be about and i considered non-muslim people especially atheists and lgbt people and people who does dating literally just slaves to me

I understand, fans and supporters do they happens to be "Asians" and "blacks" that my former partner said to me he couldn't stand ??… Gotcha hahah …

I can understand using the word ruin since the mate said to me my former partner ruined "my life and "ruined" his and i's friendship and that's why he called my former partner the biggest mistake of my life and urged me to get a guy on my level after saying that my former partner was not on my level hahaha .. but my former partner won't and can't see this because he is in "love" with my former friend.

My former partner surely like the word ruin and I remember him telling me G "your people ruined our relationship" and he even said that he wished I had never told him anything about my mates.

This former friend told me he did find it "disgusting" that a man can like another man. So that's being Anti LGBT right?? …. When it comes to talking about Allah, my former partner said he didn't believe in religion and now all of a sudden he believes in religion. Hahah don't make me laugh..

It must pain my former partner that he will do anything and everything for that "mate" but he will never want him, It must hurt huh ..

I know a lot of people in that what's app group who have said worse and said terrible things about those things that you have mentioned before. Just because it hasn't been brought to light doesn't mean they didn't. ( because I know majority of them ). So if someone is saying that I deserve to suffer for actually doing the same thing as them what does that make them ?

I know some of the religious people in that group who are very Anti- LGBT and I can just laugh at this because it's all filled with hypocrites who secretly despise one another but just enjoy the gossip because I'm the topic.

I will not be part of that mess anymore and I can't wait to leave this world.

Hypocrites that's what they are.

And also who is to say that making up a lie about "rape" is not worse than having certain views when it comes things, at least I don't go and make up lies and destroys peoples lives.

Anyone who makes up a lie like that in order to cause harm will never have peace or be happy (I'm talking about my ex because after all this denial he will never be able to be who he truly is because it will prove my point be it now or later when I have left this world)