if will they think I don’t love them

[wildflowers1996]

I'm scared if I ctb my family will be thinking I didn't love them enough to stay alive for them
will they feel unloved? betrayed? angry?
I would leave a note telling them I love them and that there's nothing they could have done i don't want them to feel any guilt
I just feel so so so selfish

 

[Always_Ascending]

I feel very similar; I feel as though if I ctb my family will feel as though I chose to abandon them. I don't want to cause trauma for anyone, I just wish I could disappear without upsetting anyone.

 

[lita-lassi]

there is very rarely anyone able to to ctb without it distressing others, its part of the human condition as social animals. all we really can do when weve reached this point is like you said, a note or several clearly stating it isnt their fault, youre sorry, its other reasons entirely etc. i dont know your situation at all so sorry if im way off base but perhaps try spending some quality time beforehand with those you love making sure their last memories of you are loving and kind. thats likely the best last gift they could recieve

 

[Return2themoonlight]

I hear you whole heartedly, I also feel that when I CTB my family will think I abandoned them instead of continuing to fight alongside them. What I've realized tho is that no matter what you feel, they will come up with there own reasons as to why you chose this route. No matter what the note says, everyone will think differently as to the route we take. If you say nobody is to blame, they will think you were lying and either blame themselves or put the blame on another. Biggest realization is there is no avoiding it. The best we can do is apologize for our actions, that way they can blame us for our own misfortunes instead of each other. In my eyes, that's the best case scenario when it comes to who gets blamed and feelings of regret. For me, I will only apologize for leaving my mom as she's the only reason I stuck around for as long as I did. Everyone else can come up with their own reasons as to why I chose this route as long as they don't blame my mom. In reality, those who brought you pain, whether it be friends or family, will know it's their fault. No if, ands, or buts about it.