
Pen>Sword
Ad Majorem Dei Gloriam
- Jan 13, 2021
- 465
I know what some of you are thinking: be careful what you wish for. I exactly know what I'm wishing for. I've weighted the pros and cons, and pros greatly outweigh the cons. I don't value my life anymore.
Fuck life. I'd rather have cancer than live the rest of my remaining life. I know the pain associated with cancer is unbearable, but I don't care about that. Living this hell called "life" is worse. If only I could trade my perfect health to someone else, I'd do it. "Health is wealth" they said. In most situations, that's true, hospitals costs money. I don't care about my health anymore.
I just want to die and disappear into oblivion. Being completely forgotten is a blessing now. No more judgment from other people. No more expectations. No more work, under-performance, incompetence or malpractice. No more mistakes to be made. No more godforsaken and irrelevant homeworks to worry about. Nobody to impress anymore. No more expenditures. No more pressure whatsoever. Last but not least, no more pain!
Hell, if the only way to have access to a legal suicide services is through guillotine, I'd sign up for it. At least most of my organs are intact and give my perfectly healthy organs to those who really need it: eyes for the blind, ears for deaf musicians, kidney for those with kidney failures, same for liver, and so on. I'd give my heart to fathers or mothers who want to see their child grow up. I'd give those for a better future for them. I never signed up to this world. I'm fine with donating my entire carcass to science since they need more cadavers, and that will solve the funeral costs.
Mom, Dad, I love you and all, but you shouldn't have given birth to me. I never consented to being born. Here I am in my mid-20s and failing nursing school with no real job experience. I'm nothing but disappointment. I want to end my suffering.
Fuck life. I'd rather have cancer than live the rest of my remaining life. I know the pain associated with cancer is unbearable, but I don't care about that. Living this hell called "life" is worse. If only I could trade my perfect health to someone else, I'd do it. "Health is wealth" they said. In most situations, that's true, hospitals costs money. I don't care about my health anymore.
I just want to die and disappear into oblivion. Being completely forgotten is a blessing now. No more judgment from other people. No more expectations. No more work, under-performance, incompetence or malpractice. No more mistakes to be made. No more godforsaken and irrelevant homeworks to worry about. Nobody to impress anymore. No more expenditures. No more pressure whatsoever. Last but not least, no more pain!
Hell, if the only way to have access to a legal suicide services is through guillotine, I'd sign up for it. At least most of my organs are intact and give my perfectly healthy organs to those who really need it: eyes for the blind, ears for deaf musicians, kidney for those with kidney failures, same for liver, and so on. I'd give my heart to fathers or mothers who want to see their child grow up. I'd give those for a better future for them. I never signed up to this world. I'm fine with donating my entire carcass to science since they need more cadavers, and that will solve the funeral costs.
Mom, Dad, I love you and all, but you shouldn't have given birth to me. I never consented to being born. Here I am in my mid-20s and failing nursing school with no real job experience. I'm nothing but disappointment. I want to end my suffering.