I wish I wasn't horrible at being alive

[hurts2b]

All I've ever wanted was bare minimum comfort and stability. Yet I can't manage even that. Every time an opportunity comes my way I fuck it up.

I don't even want to die all that badly. I just have to because the alternative is completely unsustainable.

 

[tonicer]

Same. I have a really good chance at a really good job but for some reason i don't really want it. When my mother dies i am going to kill myself anyway so why build a career?! I only applied for the position because i want to support my mother in any way i can because she is really nice and has done so much for me.