Venting i wish i didnt wake up bc of him

[sillyprincessmeow]

okay so basically it appears i will in fact be attempting tonight. i went to sleep at around 9:00 pm after my boyfriend left me on delivered for almost 30 mins. we had been on the phone since i posted up until abou 7:40 bc he wanted to shower. i told him to call me after and he never did. he acted like what he was doing (getting back scratches from whomever [lame]) was so much more important. he forgot about me for almost two hours and then called me at 10:30, blowing up my phone (1 missed call and like 10 msgs)
saying he was worried. obviously he wasnt if he couldnt bother remembering me. now hes just being mean again, asking what im typing and not doing snything to make me feel better. hes literally trying to go to sleep after making me fucking sob again. what the hell is his problem?? he acted like he didnt do anything wrong because ive left him on delievred for "two hours", like you left your SUICIDAL girlfriend on delievred for over an hour for what? to sit on your ass and watch youtube? hes so hrrible. hes taken away my will to live. i will be attempting tonight. there is nothing stopping me, unless of course i lose the motivation to do that. im getting number. my energy is being drained. ive got nothing keepinng me happy. my life is going so far into hell and i cannot stop it unless i kill myself.

all i wanted was for him to love me. all i wanted was for a good boyfriend. he said hed chang, he saisid it today.. hes said it so mnay time but nothing has ever changed. im suvh a fool fir beleiveing. i just wish i felt loved before i go. oh well, wishes cant alwas be obtainable..

 

[Sulyya]

Love is hard to find, especially in certain places. But we understand you.

 

[rec]

It sounds like he only cares about you when he thinks you're dead, which is horrible. He isn't right for you at all.

 

[SilentSadness]

That sounds painful for you, sadly you can't rely on anyone in this world. People are innately selfish and only see things from their own perspective, hence the huge majority of pro-life/pro-pain ideology. Anyway I hope that you don't suffer for much longer.

 

[AngelicPsychedelic]

I feel for you! Some people are so shitty in this world for absolutely no reason! If you decide to ctb by hanging, please be careful! If it goes wrong you can be in a lot of pain and end up with brain damage and I don't want you to suffer more than you already are! I hope you don't suffer for much longer! Life can be so cruel to some people! <3

 

[Georg]

Love don't exist for all people.

 

[FuneralCry]

The unfortunate reality is that in this world many people certainly can be so cruel and insensitive and you just cannot trust and rely on people because of that. It's awful to me how other people cause so much pain to be experienced, and it's very much understandable wishing to finally be free from all of the suffering. But anyway I wish you the best.