coseymo

coseymo

I'd rather be sleeping
Sep 21, 2022
10
But I have no money. I wish I had the resources to buy land, build a house and grow my own food. I'm in university, pursuing a career while having 0 desire to work, developed cleanliness OCD and a makeup addiction, my diet is express sushi, instant oatmeal and cigarettes. How am I supposed to have passions or dreams while living in hell. I don't want to be traditional, I want to go back to being a neanderthal that picks berries, rolls in dirt and dies at 25. I wish I did not know what germs are. I wish I didn't have to worry about calories. I wish I could look in the mirror and not feel disgusted by myself in my natural state. Does anyone feel like that? How do you escape?
 
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lonelygirl111

lonelygirl111

i don’t know what i’m doing anymore
Sep 20, 2022
55
tradition is so damaging, i wish to be free too
 
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H

Hollowman

Empty
Dec 14, 2021
1,329
Yeah I've felt like that for decades. If I could I'd disappear into the wilderness and be a wildman.
 
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helplessness

helplessness

Member
Sep 24, 2022
29
I want off the grid life too. Living in the wilderness.
 
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Gniook

Gniook

Member
Jul 31, 2022
7
I feel you. I often fantasize about leaving all of my life behind and dissapearing
 
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ever so lonely

ever so lonely

terry joseph williams
Apr 17, 2022
282
wow that is the dream my friend to live off grid and maybe have sustainable renewable energy maybe working from home, maybe we should build our own communities and live off grid a kind of ss society of our own making away from this shit show
 
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J

Julgran

Enlightened
Dec 15, 2021
1,427
But I have no money. I wish I had the resources to buy land, build a house and grow my own food. I'm in university, pursuing a career while having 0 desire to work, developed cleanliness OCD and a makeup addiction, my diet is express sushi, instant oatmeal and cigarettes. How am I supposed to have passions or dreams while living in hell. I don't want to be traditional, I want to go back to being a neanderthal that picks berries, rolls in dirt and dies at 25. I wish I did not know what germs are. I wish I didn't have to worry about calories. I wish I could look in the mirror and not feel disgusted by myself in my natural state. Does anyone feel like that? How do you escape?

We are all imperfect beings. You are not worth less than the rest of us, but I do understand that you may be having severe doubts about your existence :wink:
 
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A

Area Man

Student
Mar 31, 2021
124
I belong to a small autistic group who have dreams of setting up a small settlement in a wild location and homesteading. We'd live in tiny houses and farm the land.

Seems a long way off still but one can dream and with a lot of time on one's hands move towards said dream.
 
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ever so lonely

ever so lonely

terry joseph williams
Apr 17, 2022
282
i dont c any feasible way of doing this without resorting to suicide unfortunately, you hear of people who go far away and live off grid they have escaped the rat race and hampster wheel, but what they don't tell you is there total spend how much it took, i know over in the uk you need a plot of land and planning permission to build on said land and that is just for starters, i dont know about anywhere else, and scotland differs enormously from england, different laws on land and property were passed during the act of union 1707, so it differs here, the idea becomes more appealing with each passing day, i hear you, i know i commented on this thread before but wanted to say maybe look into making it a reality if it is feasible for others it is feasible for us too, but i hear this sentiment so much like you want no part of it whatsoever, and people just dont understand, or assume you're playing when u mean it, have you looked into off grid living in your local area ?, maybe there is advice and guidance available to help assist you in making it happen, or get the ball rolling at least, wherever it is you may ben resident in, if your adamant about going your own way, i truly don't blame you for feeling this way either, you just get truly worn down by interactions esp irl when everybody WANTS or EXPECTS something from you.
 
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A

Area Man

Student
Mar 31, 2021
124
Yeah as an autistic honestly wherever you go it's the same exhausting problem of dealing with humans who expect you to play on the playbook you don't have. I have too many other problems besides including a general lack of motivation nowadays. Living off-grid can be backbreaking getting set up and not to mention the UK government are generally hostile to any attempt by a citizen to escape their imposed neoliberal system.
 
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C

crimson blue

My demons haunt me
Sep 29, 2022
90
I´d love living in the forest, as Julgran said we are all imperfect beings.
 
Hollowillow

Hollowillow

The only place that allows negative feelings.
Aug 7, 2022
1,515
But I have no money. I wish I had the resources to buy land, build a house and grow my own food. I'm in university, pursuing a career while having 0 desire to work, developed cleanliness OCD and a makeup addiction, my diet is express sushi, instant oatmeal and cigarettes. How am I supposed to have passions or dreams while living in hell. I don't want to be traditional, I want to go back to being a neanderthal that picks berries, rolls in dirt and dies at 25. I wish I did not know what germs are. I wish I didn't have to worry about calories. I wish I could look in the mirror and not feel disgusted by myself in my natural state. Does anyone feel like that? How do you escape?
I Wish!

The immune system are blood cells made with vitamin B and C to absorb iron. Do basic cleaning & trust your body. Covid is a scam

No need to count calories when focussing on eating food high in vitamin c (greens) and b (meat). You can't make fat with them. Only muscles, nerves, everything fancy.
 
theboy

theboy

Illuminated
Jul 15, 2022
3,016
you can escape by closing your eyes, turn on some music and imagine the perfect world.
 
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Hollowillow

Hollowillow

The only place that allows negative feelings.
Aug 7, 2022
1,515
you can escape by closing your eyes, turn on some music and imagine the perfect world.
I'd feel more depressed after by comparison.
 
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whatevs

whatevs

Mining for copium in the weirdest places.
Jan 15, 2022
2,914
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whatevs

whatevs

Mining for copium in the weirdest places.
Jan 15, 2022
2,914
And what do you suggest?
I'm trying spiritual Illumination and psychological transformation. The world won't morph into what I want but I can morph into someone that no longer suffers as much.
 
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makethepainstop

makethepainstop

Visionary
Sep 16, 2022
2,032
you can escape by closing your eyes, turn on some music and imagine the perfect world.
Have you been peeking in my bedroom window? How did you find out where I live? I do that and of course, my trusty TCH gummies make the experience even more enjoyable! Love and hugs to all!
 
S

SarRy

Student
Oct 5, 2022
192
I struggle with a similar feeling. After more reflection I've started to think about what I'd really get from the rural/rustic life. I figure a sort of modern monastic/hermit life would give me the same simplicity and solitude. I only need to have the bare minimum income etc. I just want to be left alone and leave others alone.
 
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