Venting I want her to know.

[Chisel]

My wife had an affair and left me and my daughter. I've tried getting help and have family around, tried moving on too.
Sadly she was everything to me, was my only shining light in all that was dark in my world.
All I can think of is that I want her to know what's she's done to me, how she's betrayed me. I want her to see that not only did she take all that was keeping me together she's taken my life also.
Same goes for the piece of shit that clearly didn't understand about not going near a married woman.
Only wish I could put the knife in their hands.
I want to ring her when while I'm fading on my SN but I know if I do she'll manage to get help to me in time for them to save me and I don't want to be saved.
I want to be able to tell her and show her the damage she's done and the pain she's caused.
I want them both to live with it forever.
I only hope my daughter and my family punish them both what they've done to my little family.
I just cannot live anymore knowing I'll never see her face in the morning again. And share those little things that you do when your together.
11years just thrown away.
I can never love anyone again as she truly was my love of my life and he's stolen that from me. Taken a mother away from her child and destroyed my little family and the rest of my family in process.
I can only hope that at some point Karma will get you both for what you've done.
Neither of us deserved this.

 

[FuneralCry]

Some people are just so cruel and awful. I'm sorry you have had to go through this. Life is just so horrible. I hope you find peace and freedom from suffering.

 

[Snake of Eden]

What you went through is very upsetting. I want to point out as a parent your love for your child should be stronger than your hurt out of betrayal by your ex spouse. Your child already lost one parent and will suffer twice as much by losing the second. Please think about your child interest before your own as they didnt choose to come to this world and exist and it is you who brought them into it

 

[Mukey]

I know this feeling. I was in a love triangle as well but I had a backup plan too. 11 years is a long time though, something I probably couldn't get over.

 

[ShatteredReality]

No kids, but I waver on whether i want her to think it's her fault. I had problems going into marriage that led to downfall, but what she did broke me in a way I couldn't understand until a year later when completely fell apart.

But she knows about the thoughts more than anyone else. She has asked me not to do it. But I feel too far gone, even though I don't want to be.

 

[sadbadpsychogirl]

if you feel you need to do it, don't do it to spite her. if she is that much of an asshole she probably won't care (no offense). really think it through.

 

[Chisel]

if you feel you need to do it, don't do it to spite her. if she is that much of an asshole she probably won't care (no offense). really think it through.

Your right, I'm not sure she will care.
But I'm in a loose loose situation no matter what.
Stay alive and fight on, and watch the only thing I want in my life live her life with someone else, them doing things with my daughter and moving on being happy, while I wither away in depression and self loathing? I don't think so.
Or I ctb and remove myself from the whole problem.
I also suffer Eupd.
My daughter knows I'm not well and I just hope that when I do leave the one day she truly understands my reasoning and forgives me.
I cannot express how much pain is in my heart one for what's happened and one for my daughter. I so wish I was stronger better man so I could watch her grow and be the Father she deserves. But I'm mentally and emotionally broken. I love her so much and hate both us for bringing her into this world only to end up here.
All I ever wanted was for us to be a perfect family. Seems fate had other ideas.

 

[Apricity]

Your right, I'm not sure she will care.
But I'm in a loose loose situation no matter what.
Stay alive and fight on, and watch the only thing I want in my life live her life with someone else, them doing things with my daughter and moving on being happy, while I wither away in depression and self loathing? I don't think so.
Or I ctb and remove myself from the whole problem.
I also suffer Eupd.
My daughter knows I'm not well and I just hope that when I do leave the one day she truly understands my reasoning and forgives me.
I cannot express how much pain is in my heart one for what's happened and one for my daughter. I so wish I was stronger better man so I could watch her grow and be the Father she deserves. But I'm mentally and emotionally broken. I love her so much and hate both us for bringing her into this world only to end up here.
All I ever wanted was for us to be a perfect family. Seems fate had other ideas.

Your story is difficult to read, because I'm going through almost exactly the same thing. My wife and I don't have any children together though, the closest we got was a 12-week pregnancy that we lost. She basically told me the other day that her and him are just waiting to see what I do before they get together. I'm hoping to gather enough courage to ctb by Halloween.