Venting I thought I had a chance of being loved...

[ming]

I know meeting men online is already iffy, but I thought I found a nice guy for once who accepted me for everything. He liked me so much at first, but then something changed out of the blue. Now I know that sex was his main priority and that he never saw me as a potential life partner. I was feeling alive for the last 2 months because of him, but now I'm miserable again. The reality is sinking back in and everything feels hopeless again. I was foolish to believe that I could be loved, but now I am reminded that the only thing that will bring me true peace is the nothingness provided by eternal sleep. Merry Christmas I guess.

 

[fr0ggie]

I'm sorry this happened. It's heartbreaking to find out someone you thought cared about you was only playing an act to get what they want. Most men conflate feelings of care and love with sex, and once the fog of wanting sex with someone new is over, they get over those feelings. Even when they still want you after the brief honeymoon period, most will still leave once ur sexual value is lost, whether it's getting older or looking different. I know it's hard to be tricked like that, it feels so personal on the receiving end. Try to remember your actual worth and value as a person did not matter to this guy, he only had one plan for this relationship. I'm sorry again.

 

[WantToQuit]

Be glad that you can at least have sex unlike many of us others.

 

[Julgran]

I know meeting men online is already iffy, but I thought I found a nice guy for once who accepted me for everything. He liked me so much at first, but then something changed out of the blue. Now I know that sex was his main priority and that he never saw me as a potential life partner. I was feeling alive for the last 2 months because of him, but now I'm miserable again. The reality is sinking back in and everything feels hopeless again. I was foolish to believe that I could be loved, but now I am reminded that the only thing that will bring me true peace is the nothingness provided by eternal sleep. Merry Christmas I guess.

I hope that love can guide your way again some time in life.

Most men conflate feelings of care and love with sex, and once the fog of wanting sex with someone new is over, they get over those feelings. Even when they still want you after the brief honeymoon period, most will still leave once ur sexual value is lost,

Unfortunatley, this is the way it has because, since only a few men have a chance at all to find a partner - then those men are shared by several women or men, and they may choose which woman or man - depending on their inclination - to stay with. Probably, even they will be lonely and without a partner in the future, when they realize that it's not possible to sleep around like that.

 

[FuneralCry]

I can imagine it must be painful to be in this situation. People can be cruel. I'm sorry you are going through this. Whatever happens, I wish you the best.

 

[busternaught]

This doesn't make you unlovable! The way you describe it makes it sound like you feel manipulated by him. Again, that doesn't mean you're unlovable, just that you're the victim of a vile person who misused your trust! I'm sure you'll be able to find someone else (and hopefully better) once you've processed this experience and break up

 

[Pluto]

I am reminded that the only thing that will bring me true peace is the nothingness provided by eternal sleep.

I know the feeling too well.

Be glad that you can at least have sex unlike many of us others.

Women are (generally) entitled to basic human affection.
Men are (generally) entitled to not being raped.
Life is peachy.

 

[Kobusu]

You're not unlovable at all, he was just a shitty human being. You deserve so much better than people like that, don't let yourself be told otherwise.

 

[ming]

I'm sorry this happened. It's heartbreaking to find out someone you thought cared about you was only playing an act to get what they want. Most men conflate feelings of care and love with sex, and once the fog of wanting sex with someone new is over, they get over those feelings. Even when they still want you after the brief honeymoon period, most will still leave once ur sexual value is lost, whether it's getting older or looking different. I know it's hard to be tricked like that, it feels so personal on the receiving end. Try to remember your actual worth and value as a person did not matter to this guy, he only had one plan for this relationship. I'm sorry again.

Thank you for your kind words :) I'm still grieving the loss but I'll do my best to get over it. I doubt I will ever find my "forever" person but I hope that everyone else is able to.

Be glad that you can at least have sex unlike many of us others.

Sex is just another temporary distraction from the endless pain.

This doesn't make you unlovable! The way you describe it makes it sound like you feel manipulated by him. Again, that doesn't mean you're unlovable, just that you're the victim of a vile person who misused your trust! I'm sure you'll be able to find someone else (and hopefully better) once you've processed this experience and break up

I mean in a way I do, because he knew I wanted something serious and reached out to me anyways. There are so many other women in the world who want casual things, so why choose someone like me? I don't understand. I feel even more pathetic knowing that a part of me wants to give him a second chance. Thank you for the support though.

 

[Midgardsorm]

Hello.

Online dating is very complicated, not that real life is less complicated, of course. I understand the feeling of frustration, I've been there quite a few times. Don't feel bad.

We are mainly apes, so sex is a very important part in the relationship, at least for the majority of people.

It got to a point where people understood how to connect with other people, understand feelings, sensations, all with the sole purpose of sex. It happens.

But you have a chance of being loved. You still do. ^^

In any case, I'm sorry that this happened to you. I wish you the best.

 

[Quiet Desperation]

I know how it feels to love someone with every fiber of your being and have them turn on you. I'm so sorry that you're hurting.

 

[Sister of the Moon]

Sorry this has happened to you. It has also happened to me time and time again. It confuses me and hurts so much, makes me feel like shit basically. Even someone I have known my whole life and been close to, did it to me, and he pops in and out of my life at will. You really can't trust anybody these days. Just wanted you to know you are not alone in feeling the way you do, and I hope things pick up for you. Blessings.

 

[LittleBlackCat]

I know meeting men online is already iffy, but I thought I found a nice guy for once who accepted me for everything. He liked me so much at first, but then something changed out of the blue. Now I know that sex was his main priority and that he never saw me as a potential life partner. I was feeling alive for the last 2 months because of him, but now I'm miserable again. The reality is sinking back in and everything feels hopeless again. I was foolish to believe that I could be loved, but now I am reminded that the only thing that will bring me true peace is the nothingness provided by eternal sleep. Merry Christmas I guess.

Similar thing happened to me. Except I didn't meet him online, he's my boss at work. It's so messed up, it's the reason I've decided to ctb in the coming weeks and not put it off. It's broken me
Sorry to hear you're in a similar situation

 

[Someone123]

I know meeting men online is already iffy, but I thought I found a nice guy for once who accepted me for everything. He liked me so much at first, but then something changed out of the blue. Now I know that sex was his main priority and that he never saw me as a potential life partner. I was feeling alive for the last 2 months because of him, but now I'm miserable again. The reality is sinking back in and everything feels hopeless again. I was foolish to believe that I could be loved, but now I am reminded that the only thing that will bring me true peace is the nothingness provided by eternal sleep. Merry Christmas I guess.

The fact that you were together for two months is a good thing except for that it turned out this person isn't who you thought they were. Maybe a better thing is to be set up with someone by a person who cares about you- when you have a connection like this there may be a better chance that they will really care due to the bigger picture of social connectinos, plus this person who mght set you up could know their character better over time.