kuroshimi
If you're not remembered, then you never existed.
- Dec 1, 2025
- 87
Recently I am thinking about giving another shot to therapy. When I came to psychiatrist in last year, right away I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety and prescribed meds. I told about my suicidal ideation, attempts and generally how I feel. At some point I started feeling worse along with negative side effects and changed the treatment plan (just started to take another meds) and started to feel better overall.
Now I am not taking any medications. I feel terrible about my life again. Just don't want to live in this despair. And I don't see myself in future, I'm not even sure it will be.
But at the same time I don't really ready to die. Although I began preparing myself to ctb, I still have some hope that I will get my life in order. And I should probably try to get therapy once again.
On other side, I don't think it makes much sense. The world is declining rapidly every time and I don't want to observe this. Therapy won't fix the world state, therapy won't heal the wound from my childhood traumatic experience. Therapy won't reduce my worries about future. At least that what I think.
I am not sure if it's even get better, I don't see any other variants.
Now I am not taking any medications. I feel terrible about my life again. Just don't want to live in this despair. And I don't see myself in future, I'm not even sure it will be.
But at the same time I don't really ready to die. Although I began preparing myself to ctb, I still have some hope that I will get my life in order. And I should probably try to get therapy once again.
On other side, I don't think it makes much sense. The world is declining rapidly every time and I don't want to observe this. Therapy won't fix the world state, therapy won't heal the wound from my childhood traumatic experience. Therapy won't reduce my worries about future. At least that what I think.
I am not sure if it's even get better, I don't see any other variants.
