I think im killing myself soon

[InductionStove]

The place I live, it is very hard to kill yourself. Not many buildings are tall, no gun, not many tall bridges. But I think I finally found a place I will jump from.
Tomorrow I will see if there is rooftop access, I want to kill myself before adulthood.
I dont want to fail this time, and i certainly do not want to end up in a looney bin if I do fail. Everyday it is suffering, I can not do it anymore. I have been searching a lot; A fall like this will not be painful - and instant death. It is over 15m - enough to kill you instantaneously. Im still thinking of a note, but I have until October, before my birthday.
Im sorry if this is not appropriately written, I dont really frequently post on forums, and im still need to be educated on the etiquette, please treat me with kindness.

 

[FuneralCry]

Failing ctb sounds so horrific to me, that is exactly what I fear so I hope that you find the freedom that you search for. It's very much understandable wanting to finally be free from all the suffering that this life brings.

 

[ThisIsLife]

It is over 15m - enough to kill you instantaneously.

It would have to be much higher than 15m cause you'd survive otherwise.

 

[InductionStove]

It would have to be much higher than 15m cause you'd survive otherwise.

I thought so too? - The height sounded far too short. I think the building is atleast 4 stories tall. Landing on concrete, its the closest to me, and the tallest commercial that I could reasonably get access too. I dont mind travelling to the city, but my parents do. Im not sure how id manage to get there either.
I think youre right though, the only other option for me would be being hit by the train, but even so they slow to a near halt here and I dont think I have it in me to do that, though it would be pretty cool.

 

[CellarBoy]

Well, whatever you choose to do, good luck.

 

[sadjenny]

Be careful friend. You need a great height to die for certain. Would you consider hanging? You need only a rope and a door. It's not my method of choice, but I have heard when done effectively, you lose consciousness quickly. It should not bring pain.

 

[DerOesi]

Have you thought about gettin SN? Sorry for your situation and i hope you find peace somehow

 

[Wrxngg]

I'm sorry for your situation and I hope whatever you decide brings a safe trip.

 

[Caoine01]

four story, 15m is like driving about 50km/h also it depends on the structur below.
it is not a a good idear, in any ways.

 

[GasMonkey]

I want to kill myself before adulthood.

How old are you?

Don't jump, is not worth it unless is a HUGE height.

 

[InductionStove]

How old are you?

Don't jump, is not worth it unless is a HUGE height.

You sure? From what I know, its almost painless if its instant. Though, I was thinking of going to the city. The building isn't tall enough, and i got stopped while going to the rooftop. I think they have an access point, but I was told off because its dangerous, and i was in my uniform.
Only problem is i have no way in hell of getting to the city, and how on gods earth id even go into a building in the first place. I think my anxiety would kill me first.

four story, 15m is like driving about 50km/h also it depends on the structur below.
it is not a a good idear, in any ways.

View attachment 106828

Its just concrete below, but i contacted a site that listed the building to see how high it actually is.

Have you thought about gettin SN? Sorry for your situation and i hope you find peace somehow

Cant :/ Ive browsed briefly, but looks hard to obtain.

Be careful friend. You need a great height to die for certain. Would you consider hanging? You need only a rope and a door. It's not my method of choice, but I have heard when done effectively, you lose consciousness quickly. It should not bring pain.

I have, but i have no where to hang. What do you mean by door? Ive tried from my closet, but its just too short. Kind of painful too. Im only 5'1 (157cm) so, i dont need a great height to hang properly but everywhere in my room is too short

 

[outrider567]

The place I live, it is very hard to kill yourself. Not many buildings are tall, no gun, not many tall bridges. But I think I finally found a place I will jump from.
Tomorrow I will see if there is rooftop access, I want to kill myself before adulthood.
I dont want to fail this time, and i certainly do not want to end up in a looney bin if I do fail. Everyday it is suffering, I can not do it anymore. I have been searching a lot; A fall like this will not be painful - and instant death. It is over 15m - enough to kill you instantaneously. Im still thinking of a note, but I have until October, before my birthday.
Im sorry if this is not appropriately written, I dont really frequently post on forums, and im still need to be educated on the etiquette, please treat me with kindness.

You need at least 10 floors landing on concrete to have near a 100% chance of success

 

[Departme]

Although scary thinking about it, I fell from maybe 5-6m direct onto my head back in 2014 (onto concrete) and lived to tell the tale but had zero memory of it happening so with the right height you'll be lights out & painless. The only pain I suffer now is from the broken spine that I sustained in the accident which bizarrely is now one of the reasons I want to CTB!