B
bluesleep
Member
- Apr 1, 2019
- 43
I still hesitate a bit, but I know it's time. I've been working on a noose for a few days, I have the house to myself today, I have alcohol an diazepam to numb myself out a bit before.
It's just been so much. My mother and I hate eachother, I have no friends, no siblings, nobody seems to love be, I've been through a lot of shit, so why should I stay, for more of that or worse? I can see what's coming and it isn't pretty or pleasant.
I know I owe it to myself to die after this many years of pain, disappointment and failure.
Anyway, I believe death is the end of everything, so please hope (or pray if you believe in that) that I have the guts to kill myself today. Also, if you have any tips, I'd greatly appreciate them.
If I'm here after today, that just proves how much of a failure I am. Please please let this be the day.
It's just been so much. My mother and I hate eachother, I have no friends, no siblings, nobody seems to love be, I've been through a lot of shit, so why should I stay, for more of that or worse? I can see what's coming and it isn't pretty or pleasant.
I know I owe it to myself to die after this many years of pain, disappointment and failure.
Anyway, I believe death is the end of everything, so please hope (or pray if you believe in that) that I have the guts to kill myself today. Also, if you have any tips, I'd greatly appreciate them.
If I'm here after today, that just proves how much of a failure I am. Please please let this be the day.