Venting I simply don't want to be here in this world

[Darkover]

Honestly why should I? Why should I want to live in this world which is filled with suffering, evil, wars, death and torture? I seriously hate this whole freaking universe and existence itself. Life is based on violence. I literally have to hurt and destroy other beings to live. What the actual hell is this?
People just keep telling me to focus on the good things. To focus on some stupid selfish pleasure. Only to distract myself from it like an idiot. We can't exist without harming others and it's been going on for billions of years. And for what? For nothing at all. There's literally screaming every single second and I am going crazy from it. I cannot stop thinking about it. Even if we are gone it's still the same. Wild animals eating each other alive then procreating to have more offspring who will do the same. This is a freaking abomination. Life and existence is an abomination.
I just want peace. That's it. Is this too much to ask for? I would want to live if this place would be good. A place filled with peace and compassion but no. I have to live in this literal hell. Only because my parents were ignorant and now I have to suffer for this. I am thinking about death every single day. I can't really cry much but I am always screaming internally. The pain has never been greater. The worst thing is that there's no end of it.
This thing goes so far and wide that nothing can keep me here. There's no excuse for this horror. I literally think that my fate is to kill myself. If not now then in the future. It is simply inevitable. Nothing can stop this and there's no end of it. There's no hope. I want death.

 

[Darkover]

I hate life for making me exists.
People have children because they are selfish and/or delusional.
Too many people want children purely because they want children (they don't have any real reason for doing it). Many people who have children, can't afford to feed, clothe, and shelter them and don't provide for them long term. They think "you're 18 now, take care of yourself." It's simply not that easy.
Life isn't enjoyable to me. It's a struggle every day. People are disgusting creatures, life is ridiculous.
We were all thrust into life without our consent i'd never consent to being enslaved in awful shit.
I have absolutely no hope for anything left. The world has absolutely nothing to offer me but pain and suffering.
I fucking hate the fact that I was born. I hate the fact that I exist. I absolutely hate the fact that I was even a thing.
I don't like people, being around people, and dealing with people, this life is a curse.
I hate being forced to inhabit this worthless sack of flesh called a 'body' with it's own plentiful of problems and needs. I hate having to use the bathroom every day, I hate having to shower and brush my teeth every day, I have having to eat and sleep and exercise every day. What's the point of doing all of this just to prolong my meaningless existence?
I hate this planet and it's selfish, cruel, and close-minded inhabitants. They've all deluded themselves into believing that they matter, that their actions, morals, hobbies and relationships (AKA all the things they use to distract themselves from the futility of life) have some sort of meaning. Even though they themselves often acknowledge that life is full of suffering and hardship, they still choose to breed out of a selfish desire to pass on their insignificant genetic code.