Venting I see no other way to fix my life, than to end it.

[Pollenallergy]

I'm still young yet I feel as if I've messed up my life in every way possible. I have made mistakes I don't think I can ever make up for, or ever forgive myself for making. I've just ruined others lives again and again, I continue to do the horrid things that make me hate myself over and over. I can't even imagine a future for myself anymore, I'm so tired of living I just want some relief. I'm currently on my way to my therapist, not that I really want to go but, my loved ones kept insisting it was best for me. It's draining all my money, I can't even bring myself to really say anything while there either, just two hours of silence most of the time. Ptsd is getting harder to deal with as well, it's ruining my life, my relationships. I'm pushing away the people I'm bothering to stay alive for in the first place. And my education has just gone to shambles, I contribute absolutely nothing to the people around me, I've brought them pain time and time again the guilts too much for me. I hate who I've become, and I'm tired of living. I wish I could just peacefully fall asleep and never wake up. It's all so exhausting

 

[Hunter2005]

Same because even if it does get better, I will still have the feeling of suicide.

 

[Pollenallergy]

Same because even if it does get better, I will still have the feeling of suicide.

I understand what you mean, the feeling doesn't seem like it'll ever really go away. Being forced to suffer everyday by simply being alive is truly unfair, I wish you the best

 

[FuneralCry]

I also just wish to never wake, I hate how we are denied the option to pass away in peace, none of us should be forced to suffer against our wishes. To me it's cruel how many people see continuing to exist here as being an obligation rather than a choice, it's like they forget that we are all just going to die anyway so I see no point to unnecessary suffering.