![obsessiveDreamer](/data/avatars/l/97/97324.jpg?1723077009)
obsessiveDreamer
angelgirl
- Aug 7, 2024
- 1
i can't go on like this. i want to love somebody and i want somebody to love me. i have bpd so all my youth i've been obsessing over people who don't give a flying fuck about me. i just want to hold someone close, to hear someone say i should live, that someone would be very sad if i kill myself, but i can't just find that person. nobody i ever liked cared about me. i'm nothing to them. if only i had someone, i would acquire the meaning to live, to get off the bed, to study, to make art, to feel emotions, to exist.
i don't feel "whole". i feel like there's a gaping hole in the core of my personality. sometimes i feel like i don't exist at all.
i feel lost all the time, i feel like i'm the only one who's factory defect everywhere. if only somebody loved me… if only i was needed and wanted… i would feel "completed". i would feel "correct" and "right". i would feel i exist.
i have so much love inside me, actually. i just have no one to give it to.
i don't feel "whole". i feel like there's a gaping hole in the core of my personality. sometimes i feel like i don't exist at all.
i feel lost all the time, i feel like i'm the only one who's factory defect everywhere. if only somebody loved me… if only i was needed and wanted… i would feel "completed". i would feel "correct" and "right". i would feel i exist.
i have so much love inside me, actually. i just have no one to give it to.