Help I need help adulting (going to university)

[author]

I want to at least try to get my life together so that even if I fail, I can say that I did my best.

Backstory: Currently I live in the US but I feel unsafe and am very unhappy here. I've always wanted to escape. Recently I talked with a friend from the UK who suggested a place within the UK that I could go to university, earn a degree, and then theoretically get a visa to work in the UK long enough to claim ILR, and then eventually, citizenship. My time as a student wouldn't count towards citizenship, but work would. It's my best shot at getting out of the US, I think, and at the very least I'll be out of here for the duration of the current presidency (which is part of the reason that I'm unsafe).

Now, I'm trying to apply to university, but I need to retake the SAT because I was in such a bad place in high-school that I didn't do very well (for me, at least. I scored perfectly average, in the 50th percentile, but it's not good enough to get into a university in the UK as an overseas student).

I'm currently in my 20s. I know I can schedule to take the SAT, but I need accommodations to be able to type my essay, and I'm scared they won't give that to me despite it being part of my IEP in high-school (which I'm not even sure how to get because my school was a charter that shut down...)

Aside from that, I don't even know how to apply. I tried emailing the university, but I basically got a "everything is on the website" which wasn't very helpful. They do FAFSA by working with the US, but they wouldn't tell me if FAFSA could be combined with a direct loan for example. I just couldn't get actual answers out of them.

I literally do not know how any of this works. I was very isolated growing up, and never had the opportunity to do anything myself. Now that I'm trying to escape my household, I don't have anyone to really teach me how any of this works, especially since I've already graduated high-school (no teachers or guidance counselors anymore).

TL;DR - Trying to apply for university abroad and I don't know where to start. I know I need my IEP to (re)take the SAT, since I need accommodations, but I don't know how to get a copy of it since my school shut down. I don't even know how to apply for university, financial aid, etc.

If anyone could help me with even just one of these things, I'd be extremely grateful.

 

[Johnzaga23]

I dont know about all that but I would suggest that you hire a counselor. It costs money but that will save you from the hustle. And he will guide you through it.
Also, I don't know what ideas you have about the UK and europe in general, but its not better here in terms of transphobia/homophobia. Its usually better in terms of social security though.

 

[SVEN]

If the University seemed unhelpful and failed to communicate, welcome to the general attitude of Government and Local Authority agencies here in the UK.
To be honest, nothing really works in this broken country. Anticipate a wait of 2-3 years for NHS dentistry if you can get on a waiting list, similar for a Dr practise. Endless delays in attempting to get grants or student loans and horrendously expensive rented accomodation (when available).
Really sorry to sound so endlessly negative, however there are good reasons why any of our young people who can are emigrating. Our welfare state is going broke paying for hotels & housing for illegal asylum seekers who are getting prioritised access to housing & medical facilities.
Best wishes in getting something sorted out, however please do think very seriously before boarding this sinking ship.

 

[enduringwinter]

Your time as a student counts, you just need to stay in the UK for 10 years. The work visa thing needs 5 years to qualify for PR, to get a degree and a sponsorship job with a salary that qualifies it's gonna take more than 10 years anyway. And you don't need SAT, just take a year of Foundation.

Tho idk why first world people move around. All the countries are the same and they get priority and take up all the quotas. Sorry if it's mean but I think you all are very dramatic. Speaking as a third world person, my family's war trauma and trying to migrate with weak passport and complicated profile have genuinely ruined me as a person, the reason I plan to die. Just decades of being a ghost. I am very bitter about first world people who could go wherever they want and fill up all the increasingly limited quota. Their countries waged the wars and imposed passport strength and limited immigration and free movement for their benefits in the first place.

 

[quietism]

The department of education probably has useful records about your high school. You can make a FOIA+privacy act request with them. Best to submit it in the broadest possible terms that they can work with. Depending on the particular circumstances of the school there might be other FOIA targets too, or at least the department can point you in the right direction.

As mentioned, the UK is really a pretty bad place to pick for tans/gnc rights. One landmark case showing this is McNally v R. Just as a very rough ballpark you can consider the global trans rights index, don't take it too seriously though. I would recommend keeping your options open for universities until you know your offers and chances at scholarships. There are a lot of pathways going to Canada too (here's one search result), I know someone who fled that way, it's worth considering as well.

FAFSA is a grant/loan application process, not a grant/loan itself. It was originally made to help with grant and loan eligibility since it's so confusing and discriminatory, but now the FAFSA application itself has become confusing and obtuse and discriminatory as well. Stigma treadmill. I have no personal experience with it, but it's been getting changed a lot the last few years and while it is almost certainly worth filling out, I wouldn't view it as the only option. The nonbinary option has also apparently been removed from FAFSA applications just a few weeks ago?

You can also look for international scholarships, although they tend to be very competitive no matter where you go. As mentioned, the SAT score isn't everything, Just keep your options open.

I'm happy to talk more about this in DMs if you'd like that.

 

[author]

I dont know about all that but I would suggest that you hire a counselor. It costs money but that will save you from the hustle. And he will guide you through it.
Also, I don't know what ideas you have about the UK and europe in general, but its not better here in terms of transphobia/homophobia. Its usually better in terms of social security though.

I didn't know you could hire counselors for this. That's very helpful, thank you. I know that the UK has its own problems, but one of those problems is not whatever is going on with the US government right now... I figure I could at least try and see how I like it through university.

If the University seemed unhelpful and failed to communicate, welcome to the general attitude of Government and Local Authority agencies here in the UK.
To be honest, nothing really works in this broken country. Anticipate a wait of 2-3 years for NHS dentistry if you can get on a waiting list, similar for a Dr practise. Endless delays in attempting to get grants or student loans and horrendously expensive rented accomodation (when available).
Really sorry to sound so endlessly negative, however there are good reasons why any of our young people who can are emigrating. Our welfare state is going broke paying for hotels & housing for illegal asylum seekers who are getting prioritised access to housing & medical facilities.
Best wishes in getting something sorted out, however please do think very seriously before boarding this sinking ship.

The US is its own sinking ship right now lol. I was looking into the rent prices where I wanted to go in the UK though, and to be honest, it's way cheaper than it is here, and the place looks way nicer than it would here for the price. There's actual food regulations in the UK as far as I'm aware, too. Grass is greener or whatever they say lol
I've been putting a lot of thought into it, and even if I decide not to go to the UK, there's no reason not to try to go abroad to college somewhere else, so figuring out how to do this will be good for me I think.

Your time as a student counts, you just need to stay in the UK for 10 years. The work visa thing needs 5 years to qualify for PR, to get a degree and a sponsorship job with a salary that qualifies it's gonna take more than 10 years anyway. And you don't need SAT, just take a year of Foundation.

Tho idk why first world people move around. All the countries are the same and they get priority and take up all the quotas. Sorry if it's mean but I think you all are very dramatic. Speaking as a third world person, my family's war trauma and trying to migrate with weak passport and complicated profile have genuinely ruined me as a person, the reason I plan to die. Just decades of being a ghost. I am very bitter about first world people who could go wherever they want and fill up all the increasingly limited quota. Their countries waged the wars and imposed passport strength and limited immigration and free movement for their benefits in the first place.

Thank you for the information, I didn't know about the year of Foundation and I'll definitely look into that.
Living in a place, and looking at other places from the outside, it can be hard to see their problems. I'm sorry about your situation, I really am, but I am genuinely not trying to say that I'm in a worse situation than you or anyone else. I'm just someone trying to get to a better place as I'm sure everyone in this difficult time is.

The department of education probably has useful records about your high school. You can make a FOIA+privacy act request with them. Best to submit it in the broadest possible terms that they can work with. Depending on the particular circumstances of the school there might be other FOIA targets too, or at least the department can point you in the right direction.

As mentioned, the UK is really a pretty bad place to pick for tans/gnc rights. One landmark case showing this is McNally v R. Just as a very rough ballpark you can consider the global trans rights index, don't take it too seriously though. I would recommend keeping your options open for universities until you know your offers and chances at scholarships. There are a lot of pathways going to Canada too (here's one search result), I know someone who fled that way, it's worth considering as well.

FAFSA is a grant/loan application process, not a grant/loan itself. It was originally made to help with grant and loan eligibility since it's so confusing and discriminatory, but now the FAFSA application itself has become confusing and obtuse and discriminatory as well. Stigma treadmill. I have no personal experience with it, but it's been getting changed a lot the last few years and while it is almost certainly worth filling out, I wouldn't view it as the only option. The nonbinary option has also apparently been removed from FAFSA applications just a few weeks ago?

You can also look for international scholarships, although they tend to be very competitive no matter where you go. As mentioned, the SAT score isn't everything, Just keep your options open.

I'm happy to talk more about this in DMs if you'd like that.

Thank you for the information! I didn't know about the FOIA+ so I'm definitely going to check that out, I appreciate it.

I'm considering different options on where to go, but there's certain places in the UK that appeal to me and are considered very safe for trans people. It's not the end-all-be-all but I do have online friends in the UK who have told me about it, and given suggestions on the safer locations as well.

Yeah, nonbinary or x was removed from all IDs as far as I'm aware. Luckily for me, I hadn't done the documents yet, so I can still pass for my birth gender and won't be held up for "mismatched or false documents". Just one of the reasons not to be here at the moment though. At least, I'd like to be away for the duration of the current presidency, as selfish as that is.