Venting I made the wrong career choice and it is destroying me.

[nux_walpurgis]

this is a mess I am so sorry

I never knew what I wanted to do with my life. I still don't. Unlike most of my friends, I never had a dream job. I went into a university just to get a degree and be able to work somewhere and make a living and support myself. The first couple of years were fine. I found this career path quite interesting. But I am in the third year right now and it is getting obvious that this career path has a lot to do with interaction with people. I thought it didn't. It was not mentioned in the department description. We have many labs that are going to take place in a hospital, which I don't mind. The thing is, we will have to take blood sampling from patients.

I thought I could do that. I thought I'd be fine. I cannot. My anxiety is overwhelming me. My hands tremble, my mind goes blank, I simply cannot function. If I don't do this I will not pass the lab and not graduate. All those years and money I spent studying this will be lost. I don't know what to do. I tried taking sedatives but they didn't work at all for me. I am lost. I want to tell my parents I cannot go on with this course. This is too much. It's too much for a job I am not even crazy about. All I can think about is the money my parents have spent on me those two years. If I drop out of uni I will be a failure. All my friends will have a degree except for me. I am ashamed. What am I going to do with my life?

I just want to end it all. Suicidal thoughts are creeping up on me. I cannot go on like this. I want to be independent but my anxiety is ruining everything. I want to crawl into a hole and die. I am trying to look strong but I am not. I want someone to take care of me. I want softness and tenderness. I am so so alone.

Anxiety and loneliness are a terrible combination. But even talking to my friends doesn't make it better when I see them doing so well, while I am drowning inside myself. Trying to make everything look okay is so exhausting. I can't, I just can't. I want this to stop.

 

[F&Inside]

Hello nux, I understand you perfectly It has already happened to me and not just once.
Tell them the whole truth, ignoring other people's achievements, assume that you have lost a few years and continue with another goal as soon as possible otherwise you will lose more time they must be understanding. It will be very hard but there is no other alternative if you want to rebuild your life.
Whatever you decide, good luck.

 

[itsraining]

this is a mess I am so sorry

I never knew what I wanted to do with my life. I still don't. Unlike most of my friends, I never had a dream job. I went into a university just to get a degree and be able to work somewhere and make a living and support myself. The first couple of years were fine. I found this career path quite interesting. But I am in the third year right now and it is getting obvious that this career path has a lot to do with interaction with people. I thought it didn't. It was not mentioned in the department description. We have many labs that are going to take place in a hospital, which I don't mind. The thing is, we will have to take blood sampling from patients.

I thought I could do that. I thought I'd be fine. I cannot. My anxiety is overwhelming me. My hands tremble, my mind goes blank, I simply cannot function. If I don't do this I will not pass the lab and not graduate. All those years and money I spent studying this will be lost. I don't know what to do. I tried taking sedatives but they didn't work at all for me. I am lost. I want to tell my parents I cannot go on with this course. This is too much. It's too much for a job I am not even crazy about. All I can think about is the money my parents have spent on me those two years. If I drop out of uni I will be a failure. All my friends will have a degree except for me. I am ashamed. What am I going to do with my life?

I just want to end it all. Suicidal thoughts are creeping up on me. I cannot go on like this. I want to be independent but my anxiety is ruining everything. I want to crawl into a hole and die. I am trying to look strong but I am not. I want someone to take care of me. I want softness and tenderness. I am so so alone.

Anxiety and loneliness are a terrible combination. But even talking to my friends doesn't make it better when I see them doing so well, while I am drowning inside myself. Trying to make everything look okay is so exhausting. I can't, I just can't. I want this to stop.

I'm having this same problem, I didn't go to university for the career path I'm on right now but I did have to dedicate years of my life towards training and I don't feel fulfilled in it. My heart goes out to you, it makes me feel so empty inside and like life isn't worth living.

 

[binkie]

People switch majors or fields of study all the time. You're not the first person this has happened to and you won't be the last. There are also other jobs in labs where you wouldn't be working with the public. My step-sister is a molecular biologist and doesn't work with the public.

 

[sserafim]

Same, I also made the wrong career choice. I wish I majored in something else instead. My current degree is useless at the undergrad level (unless I want to be paid peanuts in a lab)