Venting I like cutting myself

[dyr]

I havent really seen anyone express this before but i kinda enjoy slicing up my arm. I really want to be covered in scars and i really wish i had someone to cut with. or at least talk about it without having to hid how we feel about it.
For me its mostly just part of how i express myself. the only reason i ever feel bad about it is when people are weird about it. I wish it wasnt seen as such an inherently bad thing.
Like everyone does something to cope. why does my thing have to be so stigmatized?

idk im just wondering if anyone else feels the same way.

 

[Traumagotchi]

I feel the same way! Would love to talk about it more in private

 

[dumbash]

+1 it definitely helps lol. I have intrusive thoughts about cutting my arm to the fatty level but can't go through with it due to sports and general judgement…

 

[minoumyheart]

I havent really seen anyone express this before but i kinda enjoy slicing up my arm. I really want to be covered in scars and i really wish i had someone to cut with. or at least talk about it without having to hid how we feel about it.
For me its mostly just part of how i express myself. the only reason i ever feel bad about it is when people are weird about it. I wish it wasnt seen as such an inherently bad thing.
Like everyone does something to cope. why does my thing have to be so stigmatized?

idk im just wondering if anyone else feels the same way.

soooo relatable. been cutting for 10+ years, cant stop and honestly now just want a partner. i be taking cute pics and stuff ): nobody to share w

 

[dyr]

soooo relatable. been cutting for 10+ years, cant stop and honestly now just want a partner. i be taking cute pics and stuff ): nobody to share w

ive always liked taking pictures right after. sometimes i send pics to my gf but it makes her worry.

I feel the same way! Would love to talk about it more in private

im down with that. im not sure how to send direct messages tho.

 

[With0ut]

i feel the same too, i'm really into scarification and making cool patterns. i also used to post on self harm pics a LOT but i guess it's gone now so i don't have anyone to talk about it with either

 

[dyr]

i feel the same too, i'm really into scarification and making cool patterns. i also used to post on self harm pics a LOT but i guess it's gone now so i don't have anyone to talk about it with either

i havent been brave enough to try doing any real patterns. im just really into my arm looking like a cutting board tbh.
self harm pics is still around. its just its own website now: selfharm.pics

 

[With0ut]

i havent been brave enough to try doing any real patterns. im just really into my arm looking like a cutting board tbh.
self harm pics is still around. its just its own website now: selfharm.pics

i've done anarchy symbols and starburst patterns and such, i feel like they hurt more (what i'm looking for) because of the lack of adrenaline so that's something to think about if you wanna do them. they do seem to clear my head a lot more tho as i'm REALLY focusing on not fucking them up.

thank you so so so so much i had no clue they still existed!

 

[dyr]

I really wish i could find someone irl that would cut with me. like we could have like a day of the week where we meet up and carve each other up. the idea of it makes me really excited. i think about stuff like that every day.
im bad at keeping friends cuz i end up sharing how i feel about something like this and it scares people i think.
maybe all the abuse got to me idk.

 

[cryvinglightning]

i don't always cut on my arm because i've had too many close calls, but cutting on my thighs helps me a lot. i make it an actual moment, where i put on some music or a nice video and take my time washing up and disinfecting. almost like skincare.

 

[exiled]

I'm glad you've found community here, and I don't mean to be a party pooper here, but I hope you're careful. Cutting, while a coping mechanism, is not a good method for catching the bus. I'm not saying that you're doing it with that intent, but a lot can happen from cutting that doesn't kill you. You could acquire a terrible infection, or hit a vein in the wrong way and cause permanent damage for yourself without death. That would be the real life sentence there. This narrative that cutting is just a coping mechanism is extremely harmful. There is SO much more this can do just short of killing you that can significantly ruin your quality of life WHILE being on heavy surveillance so you can't even CTB & have an out.

I don't say this to sound like I want to destroy your need for community. Just take it from me because I was a cutter. I also have a couple illnesses I was born with. For me, the two did not seem to go together and I ended up in a really, really treacherous spot. Alive, but totally in capable of killing myself, and furthermore suffering.

 

[sulyed]

I've actually always had fantasies of having a partner who would cut with me, I've sh'd a long time and while I never got deep I would go crazy with cat scratches all over my body. I always dreamed of having a boyfriend who would sit with me and we could cut together, make it cute and gross and romantic.

Related note, If we pushed eachother to be more toxic that would be the dream. I know it's a messed up fantasy, but my current partner is too good to me. I never felt like I deserved someone to be good to me, I want someone to hurt me or at least encourage me to hurt myself. Idk if it's the trauma or the kink talking though.

 

[NeedAnEscape]

I have not cut myself in a long time, but I still experience urges frequently. I miss my coping strategy.

 

[Idontwanttolive_200]

I have not cut myself in a long time, but I still experience urges frequently. I miss my coping strategy.

Honestly i miss it too. Its the biggest relief ive ever felt. Have not done it consistently in a year. I miss waking up every morning and cutting but i cant bring myself to do it like that again. Ill occasionally do a real deep cut in my leg, but i always limit myself to one or two.