Venting I just want to be loved

[Futile]

You know the drill: no friends, no gf, family doesn't care. But at the end, it isn't even the real problem; the real problem is that I already know that if I go outside to meet new people everyone will automatically reject me before even speaking, because in their minds I'm "inferior" and unworthy to be considered a real person

There's nothing for me out there, no exeperiences to be lived and that's what hurts most. I'm stuck in this endless loop of pain and boredom without any way of getting out

Even on this very site every time someone talks about his problems deriving from being an ugly male, people like to gaslight him pretending that the problem doesn't exist or that it's still somehow his fault. This reflects what I've already said about normies not considering us worthy of living and therefore, not considering our problems worthy of care.

It really sickens me, but more than that it depresses me knowing that there's no love on this world and people only care about genes and nothing else

It's too late now, nothing can fix me and/or this world, leaving is the only reasonable choice

 

[delilahmaie]

I know looks do play a part in how the word treats you, especially in a social setting and I'm sorry to hear you are suffering but there are so many happy ugly people out there. I actually have the opposite idea In my head, I personally thought people less admirable are happier, because there isn't any pressure. You can be who you are without constantly striving to be better. When you do find someone you know they want you for you. Being good looking doesn't make the world turn for you it can actually make things worse. Obviously I'm talking from a female perspective but just thought I'd chip in to try show you that there are so many people who feel this way no matter on their looks. It's easy to focus your issues onto a specific fault, you're not good looking enough you'll never be happy kinda thing when even good looking people wake up and think that exact same thing because there is always someone better looking. I think if you convince yourself of a problem that you can't fix you can let it consume you, making it all feel even more hopeless. I think the problem is more likely down to social skills and a warped thought process. I get sickened by the world but realistically I'm more angry at myself for not fitting into it.

 

[Meditation guide]

Even on this very site every time someone talks about his problems deriving from being an ugly male, people like to gaslight him pretending that the problem doesn't exist or that it's still somehow his fault.

Do you know what Woody Allen looked like? When I think of ugly that person comes to mind yet he had girls. Howard Stern too, very ugly but no problem getting girls. I've seen terrible looking homeless men get attractive women.

Women are not completely focused on a man's looks sometimes. There could be other things they like about him.

 

[nitroautnz]

Do you know what Woody Allen looked like? When I think of ugly that person comes to mind yet he had girls. Howard Stern too, very ugly but no problem getting girls. I've seen terrible looking homeless men get attractive women.

I agree, look don't do everything.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

I feel for ya dude. I'm also quite ugly. As other people are saying, looks aren't everything though. If you want to cast your net really wide, then being tall and/or very successful helps in a lot of ways in attracting them as long as you're not physically deformed or anything like the Hunchback of Notre Dame or something (If you are, then I'm sorry for bringing it up). Anyway, being approachable and funny also apparently works but those can take a long time to work on if you aren't already at that level.

 

[XYZ]

problem doesn't exist or that it's still somehow his fault. This reflects what I've already said about normies not considering us worthy of living and therefore, not considering our problems worthy of care.

Hello, average looking "normie" here!

I have never considered anyone unworthy to live because of their looks. I believe your suffering is real and I feel compassion for you. It is not your fault that you were dealt a bad hand at birth.

But I would still like to offer you a different perspective on the matter: yes, you have been wronged genetically, and yes, average people have an advantage over you, but there are plenty of "ugly" men and women with careers, partners, friends and successful lives. So, it's not all society's fault that you feel rejected.

You must accept some responsability for how others perceive you.

There are things you can control (such as being kind, compassionate, hard working and helpful) that can make others appreciate and like you. And the good news is that these attributes have nothing to do with looks.

I must add that I hate using the word "ugly" to describe bodies. The only ugly people I have met in this world had blackness pouring out from their inside their hearts, their ugliness had nothing to do with their physical appearance.

 

[tsuina]

people don't like me irl because of my appearance. i'm not ugly, in fact, most people would say i'm cute.. i guess. well, that's the problem. i look like a 12 year old due to my weight, my style, and my genetics. so people my age reject me entirely, thinking i'm just some weird little kid following the big college kids around (...when i'm literally just the same age as them.) and people are mean, so they shun me, they don't ask me my age or anything. it's hard and i definitely feel isolated. not lonely, but hated by society and isolated.
but i also am in a serious relationship. and yet, i also desire to be loved, because i don't feel loved in my relationship most of the time due to my own faults. more and more i can sense my partner hating me and wanting to leave me, and i almost hope they would so i'd be one step closer to CTB.... but even when you have a girlfriend/boyfriend- it doesn't mean you'll feel loved. especially if you don't love yourself.. it's hard to fill that void..

 

[Futile]

Do you know what Woody Allen looked like? When I think of ugly that person comes to mind yet he had girls. Howard Stern too, very ugly but no problem getting girls. I've seen terrible looking homeless men get attractive women.

Women are not completely focused on a man's looks sometimes. There could be other things they like about him.

The fact you consider them ugly proves my point, truly ugly people don't get even considered as people

I feel for ya dude. I'm also quite ugly. As other people are saying, looks aren't everything though. If you want to cast your net really wide, then being tall and/or very successful helps in a lot of ways in attracting them as long as you're not physically deformed or anything like the Hunchback of Notre Dame or something (If you are, then I'm sorry for bringing it up). Anyway, being approachable and funny also apparently works but those can take a long time to work on if you aren't already at that level.

I appreciate your effort, but what does being "approachable" mean when people just don't want to talk to you? A lot of these social skills are just a polite way of saying looks at the end of the day

 

[noaccount]

Ok it's a real problem, but you know that women considered ugly don't get treated any better right?

 

[Futile]

Ok it's a real problem, but you know that women considered ugly don't get treated any better right?

Ugly women can still (fairly easily really) find friendship and love

 

[Wheelz1985]

I feel ya brother man. I want to be loved too. But I hate myself and my self esteem is super low. Hence, suicide..fuck this place and my fat genetics

 

[noaccount]

Ugly women can still (fairly easily really) find friendship and love

Dude. If you're a man don't even try, to speak to what experiences women do and don't have. It's not that hard. (Especially if you consider it "GASLIGHTING" for people to do the same to you!!) Also don't conflate sexual objectification with love for fucks sake. Having someone want to hook up with you is not the same as friendship or understanding or respect or even BEING SEEN AS A HUMAN BEING. And the good news is, by your own standards and descriptions, you could also "find friendship" if you didn't expect that to mean something else, or be from women!

 

[L I F E T O L O S E]

You know the drill: no friends, no gf, family doesn't care. But at the end, it isn't even the real problem; the real problem is that I already know that if I go outside to meet new people everyone will automatically reject me before even speaking, because in their minds I'm "inferior" and unworthy to be considered a real person

There's nothing for me out there, no exeperiences to be lived and that's what hurts most. I'm stuck in this endless loop of pain and boredom without any way of getting out

Even on this very site every time someone talks about his problems deriving from being an ugly male, people like to gaslight him pretending that the problem doesn't exist or that it's still somehow his fault. This reflects what I've already said about normies not considering us worthy of living and therefore, not considering our problems worthy of care.

It really sickens me, but more than that it depresses me knowing that there's no love on this world and people only care about genes and nothing else

It's too late now, nothing can fix me and/or this world, leaving is the only reasonable choice

that is normal,not always for being an ugly guy,not a reason to kill yourself

 

[Futile]

Dude. If you're a man don't even try, to speak to what experiences women do and don't have. It's not that hard. (Especially if you consider it "GASLIGHTING" for people to do the same to you!!) Also don't conflate sexual objectification with love for fucks sake. Having someone want to hook up with you is not the same as friendship or understanding or respect or even BEING SEEN AS A HUMAN BEING. And the good news is, by your own standards and descriptions, you could also "find friendship" if you didn't expect that to mean something else, or be from women!

Gaslighitng is when you undermine a specific person's experience. If you said "ugly men have no problem" it wouldn't have been gaslighting (still false though)

As for the rest, every woman can find a loyal boyfriend if she wants to, there are more than enough lonely boys on this world for it. And no, people seek good genes even in friendship (for social status and shit like that), so even making friends is almost impossible.

that is normal,not always for being an ugly guy,not a reason to kill yourself

Any reason for ctb is a good reason if you want to

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

I appreciate your effort, but what does being "approachable" mean when people just don't want to talk to you? A lot of these social skills are just a polite way of saying looks at the end of the day

I meant like not being overtly rude, particularly to strangers. Although, yeah while being ugly does make people less likely to physically approach you, there are mental or emotional reasons not to approach someone too like if they appear to be violent or easily enraged. That's more of what I meant. I don't think looks always takes priority over social skills when it comes to just getting people to approach you for completely platonic reasons at least (again, unless you're actually physically deformed). Waiters and waitresses will still serve you because it is their job and coworkers might do the same. But I get it, you can still resent that people will only approach if they have to and knowing they might already be repulsed by your looks up close is no fun either. Though I don't know exactly what features of yours are ugly so I can't say for sure. Hope you know I meant no disrespect.

 

[262653]

There are things you can control (such as being kind, compassionate, hard working and helpful) that can make others appreciate and like you. And the good news is that these attributes have nothing to do with looks.

I feel different about it, that for things like you mentioned there are some underlying causes. These things might have to be considered worth doing by internal authorities, and there would be certain preferences. Without preferences (wanting one over the other) there would be no decisions, like to be kind vs. cruel. And even if we could choose what we want, it would in turn be based on something... like me wanting the pain to be enjoyable might be influenced by my preference for avoiding pain instead of wanting and welcoming it.

I've heard a quote that was attributed to Spinoza, loosely: "A sense of free will rises as the result of being aware of the events but unaware of their causes."

 

[Hanna Backer]

You know the drill: no friends, no gf, family doesn't care. But at the end, it isn't even the real problem; the real problem is that I already know that if I go outside to meet new people everyone will automatically reject me before even speaking, because in their minds I'm "inferior" and unworthy to be considered a real person

There's nothing for me out there, no exeperiences to be lived and that's what hurts most. I'm stuck in this endless loop of pain and boredom without any way of getting out

Mesmo neste mesmo site, toda vez que alguém fala sobre seus problemas decorrentes de ser um homem feio, as pessoas gostam de chamá-lo de gás fingindo que o problema não existe ou que ainda é de alguma forma culpa dele. Isso reflete o que já disse sobre os normies não nos considerarem dignos de viver e, portanto, não considerarem nossos problemas dignos de cuidado.

Isso realmente me enoja, mas mais do que isso me deprime saber que não existe amor neste mundo e as pessoas só se preocupam com os genes e nada mais

Agora é tarde demais, nada pode consertar a mim e / ou este mundo, partir é a única escolha razoável
[/CITAR]i wanted love me

 

[Tonight634]

Ugly girl here. I know how you're feeling, it's like there are two worlds here. The one for attractive people and for us, ugly. What can I say. It sucks and I'm gonna kill myself because of it because I feel like a worthless trash, inferior to the normal good looking people.

 

[nitroautnz]

I don't think I am attractive, but I still ended in a relationship for 4years, still not sure how it happens. But it was the best 4 years of my life regardless. But I definitely experience that the more you look for it the less you find.

 

[Futile]

Ugly girl here. I know how you're feeling, it's like there are two worlds here. The one for attractive people and for us, ugly. What can I say. It sucks and I'm gonna kill myself because of it because I feel like a worthless trash, inferior to the normal good looking people.

Thank you for understanding, it's truly a different world. Even here most people don't seem to get it, nothing matters when you're ugly

 

[262653]

I've recently joined a group chat on discord, there were two women with webcams, and I didn't like the way one of them looked. She had her qualities but I just couldn't cope with her appearance. I feel like it's a natural thing, like the lion wants antelope's meat while the antelope doesn't want to part with her meat. At least one party is bound to become the loser of a conflict. The same with liking someone who doesn't like you back.

 

[Tonight634]

Thank you for understanding, it's truly a different world. Even here most people don't seem to get it, nothing matters when you're ugly

Right? Last Friday I went drinking with my friend (she is BEAUTIFUL) and when I finally got drunk I started crying telling her I wanna be pretty, that life is different for me than for her and guess what I got as an answer - ooh but beauty is not everything....Pfff - when you're ugly it doesn't matter if your smart, talented, kind person. You're nothing. That's the truth

 

[inflammed123]

You know the drill: no friends, no gf, family doesn't care. But at the end, it isn't even the real problem; the real problem is that I already know that if I go outside to meet new people everyone will automatically reject me before even speaking, because in their minds I'm "inferior" and unworthy to be considered a real person

There's nothing for me out there, no exeperiences to be lived and that's what hurts most. I'm stuck in this endless loop of pain and boredom without any way of getting out

Even on this very site every time someone talks about his problems deriving from being an ugly male, people like to gaslight him pretending that the problem doesn't exist or that it's still somehow his fault. This reflects what I've already said about normies not considering us worthy of living and therefore, not considering our problems worthy of care.

It really sickens me, but more than that it depresses me knowing that there's no love on this world and people only care about genes and nothing else

It's too late now, nothing can fix me and/or this world, leaving is the only reasonable choice

sending love and hugs your way, you are loved.

 

[delilahmaie]

Everyone that thinks being seen as beautiful would turn their life around and they would suddenly live this happy sociable life, please try to consider that you are not correct. You are making assumptions because you haven't experienced it. It's what we all do constantly. Chunkier people wish they were skinny, skinny people wanna be thick. Tall people are wishing they were petite, lanky men want to be build and buff. We naturally want what we don't have, but it's a grass is greener thing and that beautiful girl that told you beauty isn't everything has probably had to deal with other hurdles you may never of had to face. Plus you clearly are not nothing to her or she wouldn't have been spending her time with you and comforting you when you were upset. She obviously likes you exactly as you are We all have our own struggles you can change your face or your body but you will still be you. Your mind and your thoughts will not change

 

[lonewolf22]

Thank you for understanding, it's truly a different world. Even here most people don't seem to get it, nothing matters when you're ugly

Perhaps you are overstating the importance of looks and overlooking the importance of personality because Ive seen many ugly people go on to lead fulfilling and successful lives. Ive been called a "chad" on forums, been called good looking by many people and had a lot of success on dating apps (matches), yet my life experience is not much different to yours. My "looks" have not entitled me to any kind of special priviledges nor has it given me advantages that are supposedly unattainable by those who are "ugly" (the only exception being dating apps which are not a realistic model of reality). I have no friends, never had a gf until recently and who as of last night, has pretty much dumped me but still wants to be a friend with benefits. She is average looking too but I was drawn to her personality. I have never been able to have lasting friendships or meaningful connections because of my social awkwardness. Ive been suffering from chronic loneliness for over two decades and have been in acute pain since. My life experience has made me desire a scenario where I can enjoy the freedom of trading my looks for confidence and social skills. Looks are pretty important no doubt, but they certainly aren't life ending as you suggest and they matter far far less after your thirties.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

I still sympathize with all you fellow ugly people but maybe this will help.

 

[lostangel]

I'm sorry you're enduring pain. But you're right people act like the problems doesn't exist but you can't blame them it's in our nature to be attracted to good looking people so we can reproduce with them. Unfortunately it all comes down to luck.