starrvingstar

starrvingstar

suicidal anorexic
Apr 9, 2023
141
another reason for hating myself that i can not move past is a mistake i made as a dumb preteen that i have not told a soul no matter how much they pester me about it because it is disgusting and i feel like a terrible human being for doing something like this, i block it out of my memory on most days until i have to think back on my life and everything that has ever gone wrong.

we all do disturbing things as humans and if you feel the same you are not alone.
 
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man_in_red:)

man_in_red:)

Wandering with no destination
Mar 27, 2023
88
I know how you feel. Guilt can kill in it's own way.
 
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Archer

Archer

Member
Apr 8, 2023
12
I too have done something so awful and disgusting when I was about 16 that I hate to even look at myself I can never stop thinking about how much I hurt myself and others I just know they would want me dead too.
 
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starrvingstar

starrvingstar

suicidal anorexic
Apr 9, 2023
141
I too have done something so awful and disgusting when I was about 16 that I hate to even look at myself I can never stop thinking about how much I hurt myself and others I just know they would want me dead too.
i understand how you feel, its so hard to look at myself/the involved in the same way knowing i could have prevented something probably traumatic and disgusting.

teenagers think to do the dumbest shit, but im glad you know its wrong of you to have done now. i guess we can only learn and not repeat the past...
 
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ExistHarm

ExistHarm

suffering
Mar 12, 2023
216
same, the guilt is eating me inside like a rot or a cancer
 
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