Venting I hate the paternalism of Pro lifers

[FutureHanger]

that tantacrul vid came up on my recommended so I read the comments out of curiosity and although I'm not shocked by the amount of people calling us evil, I'm still pissed off that when people are born against their will in a world that gives plenty of reasons for people to want to die, rather than pro lifers seeing the world as the problem that needs change or just allowing those who've always been suicidal for natural/genetic inclinations to just choose to die they instead try the individualistic solution of telling people not to die which is just so unfair, some people are just naturally suicidal why should someone like that be forced to live simply because most people aren't naturally like that and can't relate? and a lot of people are pushed to suicide due to how shit their life is, why should people who've been driven to suicide be forced to live just because MAYBE they might get better? Sure there's plenty of suicidal people who get the help and recovery they want and a lot of the comments were from people like that but that's a massive survivorship bias as there are people with multiple attempts who are still suicidal and most of the people who were beyond "saving" are already dead so it's hard to be certain whether those people would have gotten better as well had they stayed alive a little longer. If I was to say that no matter what, people should be allowed to live if they want then no one would bat an eye but once it's the opposite end of the coin that people should be allowed to die then all of a sudden it's an issue because MAYBE in the future they'll change their mind, well if you're dead it wont matter if it would've gotten worse or better and besides we all die regardless so it's the peak of self righteous paternalism to extend the life of someone who doesn't want to live anymore because of your own view of life that it's inherently good and death should be avoided like the plague, as if people dont all die at some point

 

[imastain]

It's so funny being infantilised by people who would not last so much as a day in our shoes. But it's not even about that. I don't understand this insistence upon denying us agencies over our own lives just so they can put up an act of being morally superior as though condemning us to living this life isn't the more evil thing to do.

 

[FutureHanger]

It's so funny being infantilised by people who would not last so much as a day in our shoes. But it's not even about that. I don't understand this insistence upon denying us agencies over our own lives just so they can put up an act of being morally superior as though condemning us to living this life isn't the more evil thing to do.

exactly and it's also partially due to the bias that mental pain is less important than physical, there's sometimes a chance that chronic pain MIGHT go away yet if someone with chronic pain wanted to die their decision would be understood a lot more than someone with chronic mental pain's decision

 

[Forever Sleep]

Yeah, I agree. I don't actually mind concern and well wishing for other people- that's compassionate, even if it's sometimes misguided! But it tends to go further than that. When the nicely nicely approach doesn't work- they don't always back down. It's sometimes clear that they won't accept that and then- it does become an insistance that we have to see it their way. They simply won't accept that we should have the choice. How would they like it if some of their major choices in life were controlled because we think we know what's best for them? With no idea of their history, health conditions- what it's like to be them? Would they enjoy being invalidated and ignored like that?

 

[FuneralCry]

If one doesn't wish to delay the inevitable in this existence that they never consented to being in then that's always a valid way to feel. I see suicide as very rational to escape from and prevent all future unnecessary suffering anyway so I don't think it makes much sense how they label suicide as "bad". In fact in my case ceasing to exist is the only relief, I find it comforting to think of eternally not existing. If someone wants to die on their own terms then that's their personal decision, it's none of other people's business

 

[huggyob]

the issue with the people which assume that; living automatically = good, is how shallowly they give thought of the matter at hand and solely hyper focus on the intention rather than the consequences of their actions and the actions of people around them - i'm sure pro lifers don't mean harm to anyone and their intention is directly tied to the aforementioned thought that living must be good and having every human live would lead to benefits. not everyone will ever agree to something in this world and that's perfectly fine, and the best course of action would be to just not associate and try to argue with them as it's clear they're not keen on changing their mind and agree with the minority of a controversial topic

 

[Abyssal]

The comments on that video make me sad, not because they want us to recover or seek support, but because they choose to hate us instead. Rather than seeing us as those suffering from mental illnesses or conditions, the media paints us as being cruel, perverted freaks with a love for watching others suffer.

I don't want to see suffering, I want to end my own.

 

[FutureHanger]

Yeah, I agree. I don't actually mind concern and well wishing for other people- that's compassionate, even if it's sometimes misguided! But it tends to go further than that. When the nicely nicely approach doesn't work- they don't always back down. It's sometimes clear that they won't accept that and then- it does become an insistance that we have to see it their way. They simply won't accept that we should have the choice. How would they like it if some of their major choices in life were controlled because we think we know what's best for them? With no idea of their history, health conditions- what it's like to be them? Would they enjoy being invalidated and ignored like that?

exactly there's a fine line between compassionate help and self righteous preaching, I've met two people online who've been suicidal themselves but are recovering from their depression and are trying to help me but neither have tried to force me not to do it and have said it's my choice at the end of the day because they actually understand unlike these pro lifers who think telling ppl how to painlessly die from SN is what causes suicide smh